Did The Pack Catch A Gator?

Nobody’s Opinion; It was one of those days in life…you hear there is a gator out in your neighborhood running around and you want to catch the gator but, you end up being too tired. The news was such a cannonade of gators today that frankly, I just wanted to crawl up like a puppy and sleep.

But there was one particular story that caught my eye. Some guy, shot and killed his black girlfriend and mother of his child, then went to the catering company where he used to work, and shot and killed the owner and her daughter---then killed himself in the parking lot.

Of course, they showed a picture of a rather worn and tired looking old white lady on the evening news, and her plump and probably single daughter, as the ones in the line of fire. The business had been there for over one hundred years, and it looked about as worn out as its owners. Once it was a thriving neighborhood, but, slowly, as the blacks moved out of the city of St. Louis and to the North, the whole place transformed into a swamp.

Still, the family kept up the business. It was at least theirs. Or more likely, they just couldn’t afford to move. They had lost another member of the family years ago in a robbery, but still, they stayed. They were evidently attached to their local church, and gave generously throughout the years, and even helped saved it from destruction.

The witnesses said they gave food to the hungry and homeless every day. And trust me; by the looks of their pictures, they were barely making ends meet themselves. Good, decent, hard working Americans, just trying to get along.

But they pissed this gator off. Why? They were going to garnish his wages for child support--the cads. And everyone knows that’s the quickest way to piss off a gator.

I was married to a gator once. I also remember the day I decided to get rid of him. We had been fighting, and he was slowly cleaning his new magnum on the back porch, caressing it with every stroke of his special towel. I could tell by the look on his face that he wasn’t thinking about how pretty it looked in the sun.

Well, of course I’m nobody’s fool. I took the guns (he had more than one) and gave them to my brother, who hid them. God knows where they ended up. I never asked.

It was one of the smartest things I ever did.

Anyway, around noon, it was announced on the local radio station that some man had bought bullets at Wal-Mart and told the person who sold him the bullets just exactly what he was going to do---go to his work and kill.

Now, you and I are wondering, who messed up here? Shouldn’t they have had a video of this guy? You would think, since it was on the news that a pathological idiot was about to murder some people, that the police could have prevented it with some quick thinking.

But…you find out that the police can only wait for the crime to happen. They are not in the business to prevent the crime. They will even tell you this fact.

How many women have asked for police protection only to have the policeman say; “We can’t do anything until he commits a crime.”? This answer leaves the citizen in complete panic, because frankly, you are on your own. It’s just the law. Even if the intention to kill is blasted all over the city, we just had to sit and wait.

This rule of course makes for a lot of dead bodies to be on the local evening news.

We never did find out what color he was, because if a black man kills someone in St. Louis, and this happens all the time, you will never hear a broadcaster say what color or race he is. The gator is never named as a gator.

Just like the fact that there is a fine line when black men kill white people, it is never considered a “hate” crime. But if a white person kills a black person, then it is prosecuted as one automatically. At least that’s how it works here in North St. Louis. That is at least the one true legacy of Janet Reno, bless her justice loving heart.

So tonight, a young black child has lost his or her mother AND gator, I mean--father.

The pack could have caught the gator, but it was such a nice day.

Nobody’s Knows: I wish to god someone would finally figure out just what happened to that girl in Aruba. It was on all the stations all day long. I have purposely NOT been following the story, because it’s obvious they are using it as a cover for all the much more important stories that they don’t want you to hear…like the Dubai company buying companies from the British which make our military hardware. The Aruba story is getting so old. I think Gretta should put on a cheerleading outfit and do some cheers to liven it up.

Nobody Cares; Malachy McCourt, brother of the famous author of “Angeles Ashes” Frank McCourt, is going to run on the green party ticket in New York for governor. The potato shortage in Ireland left such a scar that he doesn’t want one more person to have to die, so he is going to get rid of the death penalty, and nuclear energy, protecting the New Yorkers from ever having to become ashes. (Sorry, I couldn’t help myself.)

Nobody’s Perfect: Senator Ted Kennedy wants John Kerry to run again for President. Poor Teddy thinks that America is leaning to the left now, due to gas prices. Teddy thinks this because he staggers to the left when he walks…therefore the whole world looks crooked to him. Someone should tell him America is actually leaning backwards. The poor man is all confused.