Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Yippee-Ki-Yay!

Nobody’s Opinion: Finally…another Bruce Willis film. My husband and I are going to have a hard time deciding which to see first…Harry Potter or Live Fast & Die Hard.

Like most American’s, we love a good movie. Just recently, they built a nice new cinema at the mall not far from our house. The seats are softer than the one I am sitting in now…you just sink into them. The sound system rumbles, and can kick-ass in explosions…even the popcorn doesn’t get card-boardy until at least half way down. It’s almost edible, with the right soda.

A definite improvement from the Wednesday night dollar shows we use to go to.

The Die Hard movies would be just the kind of action stuff that would have been simply awesome at the drive-in. Sure, the technology wasn’t there, and most of the time you couldn’t see the whole screen, but you didn’t care.

Yeah, John McClane on a summer night, kicking back in the lawn chair would have been just awesome. It gets so warm here at night. And there’s always a breeze. Ahhhh

If I actually could stand the taste of beer, it would be a good runner up to post-heaven.

Back in the 1970’s on Friday night, people used to pay about six dollars to get in (And that was for TWO people, kids free)…park the car, take out their lawn chairs and their coolers, watch the sun set…put the blankets up for the kids. And it was great. You would look around and see America…the hard workers getting their night out. The kids always fell asleep by the end of the second movie, and if they didn’t you’d drug them. (Just kidding)

Hey, the kids were excited just to be with mom and dad. It was almost like a mini-camping trip.

Well, darn…the drive-ins are gone. Even the dollar shows are gone. But the new movie theaters are really awesome if you can afford to go.

And even though we now have all these humongous theaters, with all this new technology, we’ve gone to first weekend openings here this year, and there are usually only about ten people.

The other two thousand stayed home.

Actually, this makes it nice because you have the whole theater to yourself...and you can put your feet up and feel like, yes, you are so rich, you can afford this personal home big screen.

I like to keep that illusion until I realize those stupid hand puppets start dancing and singing and I can’t turn them off with my remote.

And then…I wonder whose bright idea it was to built eighteen theaters, which can hold up to probably the population of Cuba, if they didn’t expect to fill them up with more than four people at a time? Somebody somewhere is really hurting for that decision.

The attendance is so bad around here they are starting to sell one night event concerts tickets. Tell me…who wants to see a concert on the big screen?

Does that sound exciting to you? Watching my dog eat ice cream is more exciting.

They also do this thing to get you to go to the new releases…the cable networks before the opening dates have all the first sequels on over and over. Have you noticed? I thought Star Wars was actually being fought in my living room, and remember they even put R2 on a mailbox, the last time they released it. I was looking for the force in my oven.

I was wanting to buy a blue lazer for the back yard.

So…last night, they had Die Hard 2 on TV to get us all ready. Die Hard 2 was made in 1990. Remember that date.

And just when you think you’ve seen a movie so many times, you find out you missed something.

Well now…how did that happen?

For those of you who have seen Die Hard 2, the bad guys make Bruce and his buddy Samuel Jackson go on a “riddle chase.” And one of the riddles they had to solve was who the 21st President was.

Then they said something very interesting. They said that the 43rd President was going to be Hillary Clinton. (Bruce and Samuel) It really had nothing to do with anything.

My husband and I looked at each other and said..."'What?"

I say that since it was made so long ago…its proof that the Clintons, despite Hillary always saying “I don’t know if I’m going to run….” in that squeaky voice of hers, had big plans.

It was proof that the Clintons were going to run Hillary right after Bill, and this move was thought of even before Bill Clinton because President in 1994. Four years before.

Makes you wonder. Did they pay for that to be written in the script? Was the director just good friends with them both? How long have they been planning this global Presidency?

And then I remembered that this same thing happened in the movie Pluto Nash with Eddie Murphy. Hillary Clinton’s portrait was on a $10,000 bill.

Also…remember in Demolition Man when Sylvester’s Stallone’s character was told that Arnold Schwarzenegger was going to be President? That movie was made in 1993, long before he ran for governor. Arnold has now become a liberal.

Sandra Bullock said that Arnold would put in the 61 amendment. Oh boy, I can’t wait.

And now we hear that on the hit Fox series…24, a woman President will be introduced.

So, this movement to put woman leaders into place has been going on for quite a while. Like Al Gore’s movie being forced on all the schools kids…kids are being primed at a very young age, with subliminal suggestions passed on by their favorite movie stars…

Who to vote in for President when they reach the right age.

Coincidence?

I don’t know about you, but I get so pissed off when names of current politicians are placed into my favorite movies, just for brainwashing sake, that my husband has to give me that “look.”

The look of “Drop it, your spoiling my fun.”

I do, but it’s not easy.

So, at a time when the little boys are being feminized by our school systems, and our movies are dropping strong hints about how to vote to all us nobodies…it sure is good to see Bruce Willis, doing his action thing, and reminding us all just how good it is to see a real man, take control, blow up the bad guys, and save the girl, earth…or whatever.

Unlike Harrison Ford, or Matt Damon, or most of the other liberal woozy men actors in Hollywood…Bruce is more like the characters he plays, than not.

About the war he said, “Yeah, I’m pro-war. If you say that you’ll look like an asshole. But I am for stopping world aggression. And sometimes that takes punching em' until they don’t get up anymore.”

Maybe we should send John McClane over to Iraq.

I have no doubt that Bruce Willis could probably solve the whole thing pretty quick.

In fact, he should run for President. I've vote for him.

Nobody Cares; Bruce also said, “If you write something that sets the record straight, people won’t want to believe it. Millions of people want to believe whatever they think I am, nothing that has to do with really meeting me or talking to me. So correcting the record is one of the things that I have given up on. I don’t’ give a shit about it. “
Vanity Fair---2007

Showing this nobody that yes...life is full of synchronicities.

Bruce Willis…you’re the man. Think I’ll take that advice. I’ve been practicing my …Yippie-Ki-yay’s so that when I go to see the movie, I can be ready.

But this time…I’m taking water.

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