Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Globalboarding Torture


Nobody’s Opinion: Okay, there’s no such word as Globalboarding…I made it up. It’s my word to describe the almost draconian actions of our ‘elite’ politicians shoving their “globalization” crap down our throats. It’s high torture at its finest. In fact, I think I’d rather take ten minutes of having water shoved down my throat, than be forced to drown in a bucket of lifetime mandatory globalization sacrifices for “the world.” I don’t think I can stand one more minute of presidential salesmen, past and presently running, making minute by minute globalboarding sales pitches in endless primary debates in order to force us to accept and pay for the rest of the world’s poverty, infrastructure, and ‘freedoms’ at the expense of our own.

It’s affirmative action, universal healthcare, globalboarding-torture gone berserk.

This forcing U.S. citizens (and other nations, may I add) into a borderless world--- stinks.

Maybe I could handle this “globalization” stuff if the United States looked like Main Street in Disneyland. In Disneyland’s Main Street USA, all the tourists are from all over the world and are united in one beautiful spot. A place where you only have to pay for your own family’s meals---you are not forced to buy ice cream for the Mexican couple standing behind you in line and their fifteen kids. Everyone pays their own hotel bills. The streets are always clean and there is no fear of crime.

Main Street Disneyland is a place where only English is spoken when you order your Goofy drink. (Please tell me that has not changed.)

Or, if they want to “globalize” us, do like Disney’s Epcot. Keep everyone in their own nations…cultivating their languages and individual beautiful cultures and customs: where thousands of years of evolution have kept human diversity alive, instead of trying to make us all blend into one happy world of socialist-consumer-buying morons, staring at our HD TV’s while eating crappy food pumped full of chemicals and hormones to make us all fat and sick.

A global world where…almost nothing we eat, drink, or buy is made in America, but made in China and transported into every single country on the planet, thereby risking everyone’s death, sooner rather than later---they hope.

Yes, we live in a globalboarding world where rich global politicians invent global warming catastrophes in order to merge multinationals companies and big governments into one huge monopolistic green-fascist money-making machine.

Are you ready to confess yet? Want to hear my globalboarding observations?

In a house right around the corner from me, right here in the middle of America, only a few miles from the Mississippi River, I have watched a Muslim family go through many changes.
First, a Muslim father killed his Muslim daughter, who he caught talking to a local boy at my old high school. It was torture for me to learn that the father got on a plane, much like bin Laden’s relatives after 9/11, and went back to his own country escaping punishment.

His brother’s family came down from Michigan, and brought two wives and about ten kids. They stayed for awhile, but went back to Michigan.

For over a year now, the house has been dark. Still, the lawns are meticulously mowed, and there is always a car in the driveway. There are never any lights on.

Last night at twilight, I saw an Arab man putting in new wires to his big Satellite Dishes. It’s been torture to me, wondering if he is planning an attack.

The Muslims here are making lots of money, owning gas stations, shoe stores, and various small businesses. The women walk around with their veils and long dresses, in the middle of Mark Twain land, and they never look at me, or smile while passing by… never. And because I’m a friendly American, it tortures me.

Not very Disneyland like.

Across the street from me lives a single mom. She works for the local school system, where she says that not only is 30 percent of our school made up of Muslims, but we have teachers hired to teach in over 38 languages. Our property taxes have risen so high, many of us are drowning in debt from taxes alone.

Now, if I go left and up the street from my house, there is a Philippine man and his Chinese wife, and two kids. They just moved into their house. They have no furniture, but they do have a huge 61-inch new HD- TV in their front living room. The box from the set still sits on their front porch. The box is so big, you could drive Jason Bourne’s Ultimatum hybrid car into it, and seal it up. They’ve been there over six months, and still no furniture.

How do I know? They don’t have curtains. They also don’t speak English.

And speaking of TVs, the other day, I turned on my cable TV and all 785 channels were coming through in Spanish! I was trying to come up for air, because, well, sorry Hillary, I don’t speak Spanish!

Seems there is a little button you can push, and viola!

But not only do all our politicians speak fluent Spanish, we are told English will no longer be our official language…bi-lingual we will be!

Que Pasa?

And if you’re not Spanish…don’t worry. Microsoft’s Allen and his Charter Cable Company give you a French Channel, A Chinese channel, a Korean Channel, which are graciously included in your basic cable package. Even if you don’t want it, you’re forced to get it if you want your regular stations.

Al Jazeera, no doubt, will be coming soon.

Several years ago I hired a roofing company to fix some hail damage, and a whole crew of Mexicans, who could not speak English showed up. Oh, I have no complaints except that one of them took my pet turtle (of fifteen loving years) out of my back yard, from his elaborate dream-vacation turtle pen.

Hopefully he went to a young Spanish boy as a pet and not turtle soup. But still, that was my pet.
Stealing is stealing.

And that’s what all this nonsense is…stealing. The Mexicans---sure they’re nice, hardworking people. But how would Mexicans like it if we came into their country by the millions, and demanded food, housing, medical care, and college tuition while stealing their lives and futures away from them, in English?

How would they like it if we called them racists?

And let’s not forget that globalboarding NAFTA, CAFTA, and North American Territorial merging torture. Whole cities are gagging for air.

Our ‘elites’ tell us that we now can buy cheaper goods from Wal-Mart. And even if you don’t make money in this new globalboarding "service" economy, we ‘elites’ will make sure you don’t suffer.

Baloney.

Our inflated prices are sky-high because of globalization. Why, the rest of the world now needs to buy gas, food, and McDonalds! Our great global subsidized government-controlled farms are being used to make ethanol for exportation!
Yes, someone is making money off this...someone.

Therefore, the free market says that our prices have to go up. It’s the globalboarding rules of free market. Go ahead and drown in it.

So, bend back, your globalboarding torture has just begun and it’s coming at you faster than a Nolan Ryan fast ball.

It’s been said that torture can make a body confess to anything.

If that’s true then…confess…you want it.

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1 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

See HERE

2:16 PM  

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