Monday, February 02, 2009

Nobody's Perfect: Michael Phelps


Nobody ‘s Perfect: Michael Phelps.

I don’t know about you people, but whenever I see a young man like this who is cracking under the pressure of being a “star” I just want to….

--write them a Nobody’s Perfect, motherly letter: (By the way…my Nobody’s Perfect! Headline got a headline of it’s own on Drudge today, go see!)

So here’s it goes----

Dear Michael,

Right now, I can imagine, you are feeling pretty low. Right now, you are thinking that all that hard work you have done to become the Olympian that you are: all the medals that you have won, your glorious reputation as the only man in history to win so many gold metals that you could start your own golden country…has gone completely down the deep-end drain. Because from now on…everyone on the planet has seen this picture and this headline, and will forever remember you taking a big swig. No amount of backstroking is going to erase this from the world’s memories. Yes, by now, the Chinese are having big firework parties, and screaming, "GIV BACK GOLD MEDALS! Jackie Chan is better swimmer!"

Unlike Bill Clinton, you can’t raise your finger and say, “I never inhaled, not once..”

What’s even worse is how “unfair” it all is. After all, we now have a President who has admitted being addicted to cocaine for many years when he was your age. Who knows what a really huge drug addict he was? We don’t even know if he has an American birth certificate…and yet, all pictures of Obama’s drug days, if there were any, have been paid for and destroyed.

And "President" Obama is being worshipped all over the world, almost as if the cocaine addiction made him more lovable and …human.
It's not fair.

On top of that, Obama smokes cigarettes, a nasty habit that no man with any intelligence should continue, especially a man with children, or a man who is suppose to be the “hope” and example for the world.

And it’s also not fair that no photographs of Obama lighting up and smoking will EVER be published anywhere in the world, because as we all know, a picture says a trillion words. (Sorry, quote needed to be updated.)

If only Monica had had a really good cell phone.

Truly, there is a double standard here Michael. No…not fair at all.

Many of us are wondering Michael just who took that picture and sold it? Was it a she and was she really pretty? And have you figured out from this “lapse” of common sense that there ARE people out there who would want to trash a real AMERICAN hero? After all, you were considered one of the last ones left. Inspirations of truly great men for our kids to emulate are getting really hard to find Michael. You can understand our frustration.

But, you did the right thing today: “I engaged in behavior which was regrettable and demonstrated bad judgment.” you said.

Lots of us are hoping you will take it a step further.
Do us a favor Michael and give Americans a real apology. Do some ads on TV against smoking drugs, and doing drugs, and the dangers of binge drinking. Tell the kids that YOU did it, and how stupid it was.

Turn this negative into a positive. Show us the champion we hope is still inside.

And remember, because most of us are thinking about the truly evil people in the world right now, our politicians and their “friends” who have stolen millions of jobs and hopes for the future from Americans---with all the concerns that we have at the moment, your “toke” will be looked at by most people as just the slip of a young man, because we don’t want to lose you.

You did make us very proud at the Olympics. Most Americans will remember that.

So go on…stay away from drugs and be careful who you trust.

And if you simply MUST party, and want to smoke, or have an orgy, or do some really good cocaine…please make sure it’s in the presence of one of our many ‘upstanding’ American politicians.

That way, we’ll never know.

Sincerely,

A concerned Nobody

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