Cervical Terror Alert!

Nobody’s Opinion; Thursday it was reported, a brand new vaccine was approved by the big guys on the federal level, that will protect a woman from getting cervical cancer, and warts.

I’m sure the name and trademark were well researched because they came up with the name of Gardasil…get it…it will guard you? It might protect you from cancer, but your still at risk for Aids, syphilis, herpes, gonorrhea, and many bad boyfriends. You are much more likely to get these others, but they haven’t got around to a vaccine for these yet.

These are the same guys that approved Vioxx, which everyone now admits was a big mistake. Oops…lots of people died, and the company that put it on the market Marck & Co. Inc., is still reeling from lawsuits. This same company now gives you Gardasil. They really need a hit right now for the bottom line, and probably those CEO retirement pensions, so they decided to release onto the world, a wonderful vaccine to be given to young girls, preferably at the age of nine.

Never mind that in a country of over 360 million only, of which lets just guess half are women, only 3,700 actually die from it a year.

For this clear and present danger, they are thinking about making it mandatory for all American school children.

Gee, can’t you just see mom taking her young daughter to the family gynecologist and trying to explain to her the concepts of stirrups and a needle that goes into a spot that she needs to protect…from what…toilet bowls? Just what is she going to tell her?

And she has to go through this not once, but three times?

Also in the small print is the fact that 80% of cervical cancer occurs in third-world countries, probably the ones where prostitution is the main occupations of woman who would not eat if they did not serve some pimp.

Bill Gates has already jumped on the bandwagon; he’s going to get the $300.00 vaccine for little girls all over the world, to sell at the bargain price of $5.00. Bill is famous for getting vaccines to the world’s children.

Well, one must do something with all that money.

Sometimes I wonder if Bill Gates didn’t just settle that big lawsuit bought on him by Bill Clinton when he was President. His payment…Bill Gates donates millions to buy the vaccines for the entire world. He seems to be at all of Bill’s global imitative specials, right up there with Bono.

Two Bill’s and a Bono…sounds like a bad rock band.

There are some experts that actually don’t think all these vaccinations are doing us a lot of good. One is a guy named Neil Z. Miller, a vaccine investigator, who insists we didn’t have cancer in epidemic numbers, that autoimmune ailments were barely known, and childhood autism did not exist before mass vaccinations programs began fifty years ago. Come to think of it, he has a point. And here we thought it was McDonalds.

I don’t know about you, but it seems for the last 20 years the government is trying their darnest to get everyone vaccinated. And coming up with new diseases to vaccinate is getting harder.

We had scores of men quitting the military service because Clinton made the anthrax vaccine mandatory when he was in office. Lots of guys were getting sick, and did not want to risk it.

After 9/11 we had the smallpox scare. We were told that the government was spending billions to get ready for the likely smallpox terror attack.

Then we got the West Nile Virus, which was going to sweep through the country and kill all old people and their pets. We were again told to get vaccinated.

This one scared my neighbor so much; she wanted me to get rid of my little backyard above ground pool. She was convinced she was surely going to get bit and die. I wasn’t going to tell her she could get bit outside her backyard, but I didn’t think she would take that information too well. Only my chlorinated pool was filled with West Nile.

She is still alive. For some reason, she wasn’t concerned about me.

Then Sars came along, and went. That terror lasted about a nano-second. And have you noticed lately that the bird flu, which the President was doing his best Al Gore scare tactic with, again ordering vaccines to be stocked up quickly----sort of disappeared?

What happened? As I write this, the news of Gardasil was just announced on the radio… being sold with as much American corn-porn marketing as can be mustered.

After all, there is an economy to save

I don’t know why they don’t just put up a vaccine terror alert on the news each night---
Sort of like that color-coded terror alert they used after 9/11.

“And now, for your vaccine alert….Today, you have a chance of getting run over by a car, infected with road rage, bit by your dog, sprayed with a chem. trail, spit upon by an illegal alien, coughed on by some kid at a grocery store…you could have a stroke, get a headache, develop painful corns, or have a fatal heart attack from listening to the news. As you know, there are federally approved vaccines for all of these dangerous conditions. Please go to you local Wal-Mart for your pick of what you might need. Don’t wait. Better to be safe than sorry. And now… the weather.”

Anyway, most people I know who have ever gotten a flu vaccine always got sick.

Yes, President Bush has been vigilant in getting all those vaccines in production, and he is sure to tell us there is never enough. Since he knows that all the diseases are going to come in from Mexico, he wants, I guess to be prepared. He knows that all those immigrants coming in from all over the world are not being checked for diseases.

So what’s going on?

Why…the more diseases the better! We have lost all manufacturing base, but there is great money to be made in the vast medical/pharmaceuticals/ world of stock options. It’s been actually wonderful---we now have the mumps back, tuberculosis is on the rise, and meningitis (which has a vaccine) has made a strong comeback. Even measles is getting stronger, all the diseases that all the children got vaccinated against are making a big comeback.

Got to be good for business.

Did you know that since polio was eradicated, the only polio cases reported were actually caused by the vaccines?

Vaccines can be good…as least the old ones were. But making a nine year old girl get a vaccine for something that she probably will never develop, unless she decides to drop out of school and work at the Chicken Ranch, borders on stupid.

So, where is that stupid vaccine? Now that’s one worth paying for.


Nobody’s Perfect; Some lady today, right across the river from me, got mad when her puppy died. She went to the lady who sold her the puppy and started beating her with it. I’m expecting Mreck to develop a dead puppy vaccine soon, as it is obviously needed.

Nobody Knows; Vaccines are made from cell lines, some of which are derived from cancer. Many researchers believe that HIV was introduced into gays during the experimental Hepatitis B vaccine trails when thousands of gays were injected in Los Anelges, San Francisco, and New York during the years 1978-1981. Also the WHO (World Health organization) sponsored a vaccine program in Africa in the 1970’s--- a smallpox program which unleashed AIDS in Africa. The vaccine was contaminated. Smallpox is an excellent virus to use for the genetic engineering of new multi-purpose vaccines. Mmmmmm…

Nobody Cares; Nobody seems to care that our children might be at risk with all the vaccines (at least 22 before school) that are being forced on our children. Some even think that the rise in autism, asthma, arthritis, multiple sclerosis, and ADD is due to vaccines. If this cervical cancer vaccine is mandated for young American girls before they can attend school, then we should insist that every teacher have it also, or no dice.

I think I’ll take my chances. I’m more worried about getting hit by a Mexican truck driver. Which makes me wonder…are the insurance companies going to cover this?
Another mmmmmmm...