Wednesday, January 17, 2007

The Nebula of Bindi Irwin


Nobody’s Opinion; While I was trying to catch up on all the news on MND after the electrical meltdown here in St. Louis, I read all the comments to “The Exploitation of Bindi Irwin, Crocodile Hunter’s Daughter.” This was just as fascinating as the flurry of opinions it invoked. This got me to thinking, about my own “exploitive” life as a little girl, and whether that hurt me as an adult.

A very good article it was, by our very prolific procurator, Ray.

In fact, my brain starting spinning, and one idea lead to another, and so here is what many would call a brain session on Bindi and her exploitive mother.

First: When trying to understand any situation, it is always a good policy to put yourself as the old American Indian proverb goes, in the other guy’s moccasins, something that so many people never do, but I’ve found it a good starting point in listening to any argument. (Hint, hint)

So, let’s put ourselves in Bindi’s and her mother’s shoes, starting right off.

They have just lost their whole world. Steve Irwin was such a huge bundle of energy, personality, intelligence, business savvy, and love, that he literally dominated the whole world. Can you imagine his personal present? Can you imagine losing your soul mate: that is if you had actually found her? Well, if you’ve never had it, it will be hard to imagine, but try.

His wife is grieving, it’s all over her face; and she will grieve for the rest of her life. Much like Yoko Ono still grieves for John Lennon. She will NEVER find another Steve and she knows it. But this whole giant conglomerate is now on HER shoulders.

Let’s face it, one read of the men on MND and you can tell that very few people in the world have met their perfect mate. And Steve and his wife were as about as perfect as you can get.

Death is very hard to deal with. (Wait guys, I’m getting to the exploitation in just a minute.)

Yesterday I was talking to my new friend Romanda, a very feisty sixty-year-old woman who, came up to me at a book signing one day, introduced herself, and the VERY next thing she said was “You know, I lost my son when he was seventeen.”

The pain, after all those years was still deep. You see, her son had climbed an electrical poll, fell, and was somehow decapitated during the fall.

So, I asked her, how did she go on with her life?

She said…pay attention…”I went back to work. It actually saved me.”

Lesson: Humans need to cope with grief. Now, little Bindi has no real concept what she has lost, she’s too young. She will later. All these projects that she is doing were being developed long before Steve’s death. The parents were obviously grooming her even at her young age to carry on in his wake. And despite the “horror” due to Hitler’s plans to dominate the world with German genes, thereby destroying any mention of genetic proclivities in any conversation (While they RACE to get the gene patents.) the scientific fact is…she is almost a genetic clone of her old man. To ask her to stop being herself, well, I doubt it would work. It’s not just the Australia money bags exploiting her; it’s her vision, in her genes, nurtured by her parents. From what I can see, pretty strong stuff.

Any one who’s had a kid knows you can’t make them even do homework, let alone work hard hours on dance routines. Bindi wants this…and in her little mind, daddy has just gone off on a long trip, and she is helping her mom…who is crying quite a lot.
(Hold on, I’ll address this too.) As she grows older, she might mourn, but she doesn’t have the memories of her mother, so the pain will never be as great.

And that’s a GOOD thing.

Second: Anyone remember Shirley Temple? A child star genius, who was so incredible talented she could dance whole routines and sing, with the same ability of her adult co-stars?

I saw Bindi on Larry King the other night. She was exceptionally intelligent. Even though her parents have instilled in here many cute phrases, that’s what parents are suppose to do. Maybe she doesn't really know the full meaning of them yet, but that's okay. She will as time passes.

Pass on their lifelong beliefs to their children when young. She was more articulate than Warren Beatty at his acceptance speech at the Golden Globes. The guy acted like he was on drugs.

I doubt she grows up to be Brittany Spears, due to all the exploitation from the media and her mom. I’d even bet you on it. She has more sense now, than Brittany, due to her parents strong sense of right and wrong.

And my educated hunch is that Brittany lacked a father in her life. (That’s another blog.)

Now, you might remember Shirley Temple, one of the most exploitive child stars on the earth, carried a whole nation through the depression. Her innocence, her laughter, her singing, gave everyone hope to go through another day. Even today, you can watch a Shirley Temple movie and come away feeling great about life.

Anyway, that’s an historical fact.

Shirley went on to use all that she had learned as a child, about meeting people, shaking hands, being polite, to become one of the most successful ambassadors to Africa that American every had. And even though her parents at the time were accused of the same thing...she always said her parents were very loving.

And by the way, let's not forget that’s why Muslims blow themselves up, because the beliefs of their parents are drilled into them from the day they are born, and continued in their schools.

I heard the other day that some soldier was asked how to solve the problem of the radicals, and he said, “You had to blow them up, and their children.”

Now, that’s too harsh, we agree, but there is a reality in his statement.

The human brain forms most of it’s personality by the age of three. According to Dr. Lee Salk, a child psychiatrist, and Jonas Salk’s (the Salk polio vaccine) brother who was one of our nation’s first men to get his children in custody fight. (Yes guys, he helped you out by setting the precedent.)

It’s a fact. That’s why it is SO important for one spouse to be with the child at all times during the age of one through three. If your child is put in a day care center, you will get a child with the States view of the world, not yours. All communists’ countries know this, and put the kids in state nurseries from birth. Hillary and Bush are implementing this, very slowly, but it will come.

So…guys, if YOU can’t be with your child, be thankful that your child is being raised by its mother for the first three years. That’s why alimony is a double edged sword.

The man gets wacked, but so does the kid, because the baby has to be put many times in day care, because the mother has to go back to work to eat.

But then sometimes the mothers wants to go back to work and not be there instructing the first years of life…and that’s another problem.

Is it any wonder why our nation is dying? Millions of women are now in the work force, millions of babies being raised by the state, or in day care centers where people have no idea what they are doing. A bonified golden plate for the nanny state that has crept in.

If you want a good scare about how serial killers are developed, I’d advise you to read “High Risk, Children Without a Conscience” by Dr. Ken Magid and Carole A. McKelvery.

Something that Madonna should have read before this last adoption. This book will bring you enlightenment about the formation of the young brain. It did me.

On the other hand, (back to the guys) if the mother hates you after the divorce, you’ve got a big problem. My heart goes out to you. The only answer is, chose your mate wisely, because you are right, the stakes are against you in every court.

Don’t go picking Brittany Spears wanna-be’s to be your wife.

Now, back to Bindi.

Anyway, as everyone has said, Bindi is enjoying this, and seeing Bindi enjoying this is helping her mother deal with her pain. Having a child stay home and play with Barbie (please) is condescending. If Bindi can cope with the pressure, and is a example to all the little children in the world to love animals, to dance and sing, and have fun, well…then who are we to take away her fun and tell her to …..Go and cry, its okay. Go feel miserable.

Go be a normal little kid. Do nothing all day, and play with your dog. Please, spare me.

Who are we to deprive the millions of children who will see her as a role model?

And from someone who has been there, done that…laughing and developing confidence in one’s abilities sure beats moping and crying about life. I for one am SO glad God has blessed her with this genetic fortitude.

Third: Of course she is being exploited! Ray is right. By anyone who can make a buck off her! Soon there will be little Bindi dolls. And Bindi clothes to put on the dolls, and Bindi plastic animals to put in little Bindi jungle girl wagons….so what? She will get part of that money, and her mother will put it away for her, just like Shirley Temple’s parents had done. Shirley Temple dolls bring a fortune now.

Bindi, it is so blatantly obvious…wants to do this! Little girls love to dance, to sing, to talk…gee, where have you guys been? You want to deprive her of that because some big corporations are making big money off her?

I would not tell my daughter that…NO…you will be used…you don’t have to work, you’re too young.

But Mom…I LOVE IT!”

No mother who loved her daughter would refuse. Especially if her mother thought that it was actually good for her.

All her mother can do right now is try to managed it all while grieving herself, and know that her daughter is going to carry on all her husbands dreams of a better world. Right now, Bindi is carrying her mom too, but that’s okay. Forget what all the psychiatrists have told you.

Ronald Reagan carried his father (who was an alcoholic) for all his years growing up. It made him a great man. Some of us can handle it, some of us can’t. It’s all in our makeup.

Many rich families teach their children to read the stock market as soon as they can.

James J. Cramer, that money guru on your television sets, started making money in stocks at nine. His fathers helped him out…and now look at him. Sometimes the proclivity towards a certain love shows very early.

Oh and by the way, Shirley Temple dolls still bring in a fortune…I bet there are grandchildren real happy about that fact.

Fourth: Now, here’s comes the exploitation of children.

When I was five and my brother was seven, my mother decided to give us dancing lessons---it was HER dream, not ours. You see, she had wanted desperately all her life to be a ballerina, and had been accepted into a very good school in New York. She studied very hard in high school, and managed to graduate a year early just to go.

But, the summer before she was to leave, she had an accident. She busted her kneecap on an open door.

That was the end of her dreams.

So, when she had my brother and me, she gave us ballroom dancing lessons. I was five and my brother was seven, and we got good enough to dance at the Boom-Boom Room every week at the Fontainebleau Hotel on Miami Beach. We only got fifty dollars for it.

Unlike Bindi, I was shy and full of low self-esteem. But, I was forced to learn to shake hands, hold conversations with adults, (and many famous movie stars) be polite, and think on my feet. If my brother made a mistake during our routine, I had to learn how to cover it up.

Looking back on it now, I would have rather been out playing in the woods.

Still, those life lessons I learned performing, were just as important as learning to swim. And the younger you get them started, the better.

Tell me, did you think Tiger Woods was exploited? Remember his father had him on all the TV shows when he was young. At the age of four, I believe. Tiger never thought so.

How many of you golfers are thankful that Tiger’s father exploited him? What makes Bindi any different? Because she’s a girl?

Anyway, back to nobody…my brother and I continued to be professional ballroom dancers until we graduated from High School. We both taught at Author Murray’s dance studios. My brother still makes a living off of teaching dancing.

In conclusion, so many of us are leaving our kids to do just as they like. Play video games till they drop, never asking any responsibilities of them. Treating them with kid gloves, as if they will break if they don’t get to play.

Learning how to work when you are young is just as important if not more so. Because if you grow up after having nothing ever expected of you, life will hit you REAL hard, and you will probably be more inclined to do drugs due to low self-esteem.

AND that’s what fathers are the best at teaching.

My mother used to tell me how unfair her father was to her. She wanted a horse. He told her she would get five dollars for every bushel of dandelion weeds she picked out of the yard. It took her all year and endless days of picking weeds to get enough money to buy her own horse. But she did it. She bought her “Lady,” a beautiful mare.

While she was working, her older brother got a new car for free, in fact, everything was handed to him. Boy, did she hate him.

Guess who wound up owning and running her father’s company? Her brother died a pathetic alcoholic. Never knowing what hit him.

Only a parent can know how much a child can take. Bindi’s mother will have to decide when to say when.

Trust me, in a while, someone will REALLY take advantage of Bindi and her mother will snap out of her grief and get going…and take over more of the promotion of the world that she and her husband built. Her maternal instinct will kick in.

Give her a little time. She’s only human.

In the meantime, enjoy the blossoming of a truly adorable little girl, who will survive this, and lets give her the chance she deserves…don’t rule her out because you want to protect her, or because she’s young.

I’m not. I’m going to say, in the words of Rona Barrett’s “You go girl!”

Steve, you done good. Sit back in heaven and guide her.

And while you’re at it Steve---send her mother a sign.

Nobody’s Perfect; Okay, I’m ready…blast me.

Nobody’s Knows; I once read a statement by the great pianist, Author Rubenstein, who said every time he played a piece on the piano he was bringing into to it all his own life’s experiences.

That’s what we all do. We can only judge the world by what WE know. But…everyone is not us. It helps if we all examine our own past and how it has influenced our thinking when dealing with trying to explain the actions of others.

No one has mentioned the little boy in all of this. Will he be quiet like his mom? Will it be hard to grow up under Bindi's star? You bet it will. If anyone is going to have a hard time in this, it will be him.

Nobody Cares; My brother did drop me on my head one time while practicing an overhead difficult lift…that could explain everything. (Go ahead, that’s a freebee.)

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