Words According to "I"

Nobody Wins: Warning: This is a “humor” piece. Read on at your own risk, do not let your emotional feminine side take over.

Nobody’s Perfect: Oh-oh…I felt a “will” welling up inside me. The “I” is coming on pretty strong too…you know what this means? This means that I can no longer speak in simple, feminine; easy to understand words tonight…I feel a mustache coming on. What I have to say might just be metagnostic….I cannot hold back the masculine gender creativity…forgive me, I must use bigger words.

Nobody Knows: There seems to be a full moon tonight. I don’t know what made me do it, but I read every column on MND and then some, and it seems metempiricism is abounding, or trying to leap out of an egg…right under the cloudless sky so to speak.

Sometimes it cracks. Shit happens.

But, what will happen to the “me” inside of me if I continue to read? Will I suffer epistaxis? Will I cry, “Manumission, Manumission!”

There are flutterings of hyperprosexia: causing horripilations upon the utterances of a roturier deipnosophist. Due to the ranting of this well respected mattoid, the universe it is being foretold, will never be the same.

Mythomania abounds, yet the mythopoeia persists!

Right on! Nothing like witnessing the necrencephalus of the brain cells, I must say, it is enjoying.

Pass the pickles! Throw me a football!

Nobody Cares: Yes, refreshingly, once again, there is a fallibilism wind of fantasmogoria, flushing through my eyelids as I read. I am female, hear me “me” …I am doomed to forever fight this kinephanton of a man, while secretly longing to go paint my toenails.

Does anyone care? NO…I am still American! And due to my good sense, I am imputrescible, especially when I’m in a good mood. In other words, if you take any of this seriously, you only have your own feminine “me” inside yourself to blame.

If that happens, I suggest sending that side of yourself roses. Works for me.

Nobody’s Opinion: Well, I enjoyed every single word of it. Not only did I see many sufferings of narapoia, which gave me great laughs and joy. I also enjoyed the wit and wisdom of many good men and women…that daily write on MND…God Bless them all.

May you all be endowed with ophelimity because it sure comes in handy…beats a gender gap any old day of the week.

Nobody Wins: Wake me up when this eudemonia being predicted comes about, will ya? Now if you’ll excuse me, I must go try and get this fondiferous look off my face.

Personally, all this morology has me craving for a bubble bath. Oh-oh…I’m losing the “I”….it’s leaving…oh…dear…

Oh well,…in the end all I can say now is…may the bubbles be with you.

*******
Much thanks to Peter Bowler, who lent me these words. They can be found in:

The Superior Person’s Third Book of Well-Bred Words

Words which of course, nobody ever says. The well-breds are on the extinction list.

Nevertheless, it was a very “I” thing to do, and quite fun, I must admit, being an “I” for just one night.