The Nobles Are Racing

Nobody’s Opinion; The word is out. The contest that will get at least as much attention as American Idol last night is coming soon. Two major heavyweights, Oprah Windfrey and U2’s Bono will be competing for the title of the world. The most sought after prize by everyone who has ever been famous, and done everything. You know, the elites of the world who have traveled in every country, and have so much money they usually start major global charities in order to keep their huge fortunes in tax shelters so that the government can’t get to it.

For the person who has everything in life that one could possibly want, the only prize left for them to put on their mantel is the Nobel Peace Prize.

Why they want this so much is totally beyond reason to this nobody.

Bill Clinton would give his left…arm for one.

The only prize I was ever given was a small mirror on mother’s day that said, “Best Mom In the World.” It was suppose to be from my 4-year-old son, but my own mother had bought it for him to give to me.

So, sometimes it’s hard for a nobody to relate to all these celebrity prize ceremonies.

Just in case you are reading this, and went through the American public schools, you might have no idea who Nobel was.

He was a guy from Sweden who invented dynamite. His invention killed so many people, he felt bad. But still, he got very rich. (To be fair, it was people using it to kill other people, not the invention itself that was to blame--- but you know that.) He set up a little contest and called it Nobel Prizes for others to compete for. This helped him to forgive himself for getting rich off an invention that killed people.

The rules are that the person (or organization) who does the most that year to keep the world from exploding up into little pieces, gets the prize.

Bono has a good start. He was on NBC nightly news with Brain Williams all last week going all over Africa, showing himself in every frame as the most benevolent aging rock star turned poverty savior around. I bet he rushes back to see all his video shots to make sure he gets a say in the editing. He is always on a plane somewhere, pretending to be an angel looking down on all us poor peasants.

He was sporting his maudlin ravings on poverty while the camera panned on a five-year-old African girl making the morning bread.

“They need schools! They need water! They need I-Pods and Nike’s!”

“You greedy AMERICANS…send your money. How can you drive your SUV’s when this is happening in the world? This is your fault!”

Well, he didn’t actually say that, but that’s his message.

Bono, who has cost the American taxpayers billions of dollars, is making sure that we know all about him and Africa. I mean, he must be keeping the peace right? Hasn’t he stopped the ruthless daily slaughter going on in Africa? Isn’t that what a peacekeeper is supposed to do? Isn’t that what Nobel had in mind?

As far as I can tell by the daily news, if you want to be raped and slaughtered, go to Africa. And if I were you, I wouldn’t carry around a brand new I-Pod.

Has he stopped the killing in the Congo? He has? Well, no, but he WILL if we just send more money.

Oprah is not to be ignored. That unbeatable mare is coming down the stretch with her billions, and she is not just giving away cars, she has opened up girl schools with some of her own money in Africa. Which makes no sense because it’s the boys who grow up to do most of the killing…but what do I know. Hopefully, the school will teach the girls how to shoot a gun for their own protection---ok, I’m in la-la land.

Gee…I haven’t seen Oprah standing up to the Iranian President and getting him to disarm his nuclear weapons and stop threatening the whole world with annihilation.

Oh, did I miss him on Oprah?

Obviously, the rules have changed. Only the past recipients and elite leaders can vote on the winner and they are all rich…which makes you wonder how much the Nobel Peace Prize really costs.

In 1990 they gave the Nobel Peace Prize to Gorbachev instead of Reagan.

In 2001, that great protector of Rwanda, Kofi Annan was awarded the peace prize.

Our former President/ now communist sympathizer Jimmy Carter won it in 2002

In fact, Hitler, Stalin, and Mussolini had all been nominated in the past.

Arafat was awarded for being a lovable terrorist.

In fact, anyone who wants to join this list is not playing with a full deck.

The United Nations has been nominated so many times; it probably means the voting party consists of nothing but fascist members of the United Nations. But, like the invisible list of just how much of our tax money goes into the black hole, this list will never be revealed.

Because ‘we the people’ do not get to see the award ceremony for the Nobel Prize winners, oh no…we do not get to see this event of events. Only the very top of the list of world billionaires are invited, and they wish to remain anonymous.

They have a big party called the Nobel Peace Prize Concert in Oslo. And they have famous hosts. One year Oprah and Tom Cruise hosted it together.

I’m sure Yoko Ono sings “Give Peace a Chance” if she can get the mike away from Madonna

Hey, these people are full of themselves.

The only people that deserve the Nobel Peace Prize are the soldiers in Iraq and Afghanistan right now, giving their lives for what they think its right: giving their own lives to give another people a chance for freedom. There is nothing more noble that that.

The soldiers are the real peace makers. They are the real Noble Prize Winners. Neither Oprah nor Bono can hold a candle to them.

Oprah is just a talk show host. She went to New Orleans, but she’s not noble enough to go to Iraq.

Bono is a glorified extortionist working for the New World Order.

Frankly, they should just share it.

As for me, no Nobel Peace Prize would ever mean as much to me as my little mirror that says...”Best Mom in The World.”

You can’t put a prize on peace. And no amount of money can buy it.

Watch…Al Gore will win. He has made so much money in Google stock he could probably buy Gandhi (who never won) a peace prize too.

What a great way to get back at Clinton.

Hey, somebody nominate Al Gore…. Mr. Carter?


Nobody’s Perfect; Hillary Clinton wants to take the speed limit back down to 55-mph. If I remember right, wasn’t it Nixon that did that very same thing when he was President? Well, Hillary is acting just like the guy she helped get impeached. Hillary is turning into Nixon in her old age. She needs to practice the peace sign. Nixon had it down perfect.

Nobody Knows; They keep the nominations for the Nobel Peace Prize locked up for fifty years. Why? They don’t want the people alive in the world to see all the killers and thugs that are on the lists. In fifty years, they figure the people that voted for the men will be dead too.

Nobody Cares; In 1972 the prize was allocated to the Main Fund. I only mention it because it’s just another black hole of invisible money. Someone got it. And if past winners are any clue, it could have been Castro. But who cares? It’s all a bogus farce.