"Protect The People From The Press"

Nobody’s Opinion; “There are laws to protect the freedom of the press’s speech, but none that are worth anything to protect the people from the press.” Mark Twain

While some really creepy looking lawyer (Who got lost on her way to Hillary’s class reunion), got some creepy woman judge named Anna Digs Taylor to somehow declare the NSA wiretapping unconstitutional, thereby trying to stop President Bush from monitoring phone calls from Al-Qaeda, and maybe stopping a whole city from being decimated (lawyers and all)---

We heard the more important news that Mr. Karr, the new poster boy for mental disabilities who said he killed Jon Benet, was actually in a different state that night of the murder, according to his x-wife, who by the way, doesn’t like him.

While Ford, an age old American institution, announced that basically it’s leaving America by closing another slew of plants, and all those people in Chicago, Wixom, Michigan: Louisville, Kentucky: Wayne, Michigan: St. Paul, Minnesota; Kansas City, Missouri; Norfolk, Virginia; and Dearborn, Michigan; will have to think twice about buying those season tickets to the ballpark next year, as they will soon join illegal immigrants in competition for jobs at their local Wal-Mart---

We heard the more important news that Mr. Karr will have to give DNA up to the police to see if it matches Jon Benet’s little girl panties. Some newscasters said “underwear” so the other perverts in the audience would not get too excited.

While the ambassador to the United Nations from China, Sha Zukong, came out and bluntly said that the United States “just better shut up” about the military buildup that is going on in China at unprecedented speed…

We heard the more important news that Mr. Karr really thinks that Michael Jackson is misunderstood by the world.

While Raul Castro, the ugly brother that did not win the prize of popularity in life, but by the final illness of that sibling who was born with the more obvious talent of BS, has announced that tens of thousands of Cuban troops are standing on guard to fight the U.S., (forgetting to mention all the missiles probably aimed at us right now)…

We heard the more important news that Mr. Karr is not going to tell us how he got into the house that night, because we all heard about the window with the spider web, leaving us to speculate.

While Boeing, the American company who sold treasonous technology to the Chinese with the help of Bill Clinton (who was looking pretty drunk sitting next to Nicole Kidman at Palm Beach Rupert Murdock love fest last week), decided to shut down it’s C-17 Production, which will throw out of work thousands of workers in four states and thousands more who work for companies that make the parts….

We heard the more important news that Jon Benet’s mother ALMOST met with Mr. Karr before she died.

While Iran is having large military exercises, warming up for WWIII…with their buddies Syria saying very jingoistic slogans of kill all Mickey Mouse lovers…

We heard that Katie Couric is in love with Mr. Karr and agrees with him about Michael Jackson. (Just seeing if you were paying attention.)

No, we heard the more important news that nobody anywhere in the whole world has ever liked this guy, Mr. Karr, or gotten along with him, because he was mean to kids. But, his mom, dad, and his first grade teacher will probably appear on Larry King by next week if all goes well and Larry will also have Mike Wallace on, and they will both decide he really is a very nice man.

While we hear that Israeli soldiers were fighting a war with almost no support and poor equipment, poor training, no water, no supplies, and on top of that they watched their buddies bleed to death because the top guys didn’t want to send in helicopters for fear of them getting hit, only to have to pull back due to the bigger war going on in political arena of who holds the aces…

We heard the more important news that Mr. Karr was sending e-mails to a professor about his love for little JonBenet, and the brave professor, actually turned in a pedophile, which set a world record for professors actually wanted to turn over a law breaker of any kind.

While Kim Jong il is making plans to detonate huge nuclear bomb in tests underground to make sure that they can reach California and are big enough to kill many many people….

We heard from CNN, FOX, NBC, ABC, KKK, and ACLU, that nobody actually knows anything at all more than they did before about this very feminine looking Mr. Karr, but boy, wasn’t it wonderful that this moron came out of nowhere and gave us all something to fill up hours of prime time, because we do need to get attention off all the danger we many actually be in.

But we do need to let you know that you are in danger without really upsetting you so we had National Geographic put on a special about disasters, then ABC did a bang-up special about the earth’s destruction, and for those of you who did not see that, we put the “Bible Code says the end is near” on the History channel, and we will continue to run Independence Day and Armageddon as much as possible. USA today has reminded the businesses that they should be prepared, and on the radio you will hear the “make a plan to get to safely” just in case you forgot, and oh, be sure and listen to your politicians, who will tell you the end is very near because of the OTHER party…

Anyway, we know your upset, so we will be SURE and tell you, as soon as we know, just who did kill Jon Benet. Be sure and stay tuned.

Nobody’s Perfect; The Department of Homeland evidently is giving tours of our airports to CAIR (read Doug Powers excellent column today ) in order to help the terrorists speed up this planned attack.

Not only did we have to find the oil for the Arabs, and dig the well for the oil, and teach them how to monopolize the oil, we have to teach them how to attack airports correctly. Just as they had to learn how to fly the plans on 9/ll over here.

Nobody Knows; Maybe if we would stop teaching these guys in our universities and showing them all our weaknesses, and selling them all our technology, we’d actually see more real “news” on TV.

Nobody’ Cares; I really don’t think Mr. Karr is as important as the survival of our nation and the ominous things happening in our country at the moment. Do you? Maybe Mark Twain had a good idea, we should pass some laws.