Say Three Halo's and Pass the Controller
Nobody’s Opinion: I have good news for all you guys. While all this feminist stuff has been crammed down everyone’s throat like so many maggots of madness, there is one place in the new culture that man can claim superiority on every single level.
Video games.
Video games…where a man can be a man again. Not only can he conquer the universe and ruthlessly slaughter and machete millions of ghouls, fight all the past and future world wars on earth and all over the galaxy---he can pretend he is Tiger Woods playing against a female with the body of a goddess, and beat her.
And every single female body on any video game is beyond belief. Where it used to be the perfect scale was 36-24-36…Laura Croft measurements alone are about 55-14-22.
I’m almost embarrassed to be in the same room with her.
This could be a problem because after so many hours of video porn the wife is going to look a bit like an overgrown pumpkin--one he might want to put up on the scoreboard.
Just think of what this is doing to all the girls who thought they’d have to grow up and look like Barbie? Good god. We need some really big, fat, video game goddesses for the girls, so when they do not grow up to be that fat, they will feel better.
Actually, I think designing video games was the necessary backlash that men used to respond to the changing culture of feminization happening all around them. I mean, come on…can you think of a better way for men to regurgitate their testosterone levels and take out all their frustrations?
You start out five-years-old killing mushrooms, and end up Al Pacino selling drugs and taking over Miami.
So, why don’t women like this stuff?
Could be, that somebody has to feed the dog. Could be, that watching 2 million aliens come at you at once and hearing machine gun fire for days actually becomes boring, not to mention annoying to women…I don’t know…you tell me.
Maybe it’s the 3-D effect that makes women really dizzy.
Men can find their ways through hundreds of complicated mazes and scenes on video, and know exactly what door to go back to--- but can’t remember what aisle the grapes are in.
My grown husband and my grown son love to sit around and play the latest video games.
They would do just that for the rest of their lives, if they didn’t have to eat.
I often walk through the room and talk…don’t ask me why.
I could say things like, “Honey, the airport was just attacked and there is a nuclear warhead heading our way.” And he would not even blink.
It usually takes at least four hours for a man playing a video game to respond to a question. It’s a great time to tell him what you bought at the mall.
It’s also works well for a good equalizer. Every time he buys a video game, you can go buy new boots. What can he say?
Just for fun, last weekend, I sat for a whole four hours and watched the boys play Halo. While I was thinking, “Who thought up this beautiful scenery, and how many hours did it take to draw it, and how do they program this stuff?” The boys were reveling in the different weapons choices.
My son got especially excited about the “hammer.” Which was just a black spear, but killed anything. This kind of confidence building was obviously very exciting.
Of course like all video games, the challenge to kill bigger and meaner enemies and go on to the next level, is the whole concept.
In Halo, you go from running around and shooting, to driving a tank and shooting, to flying a plane and shooting, to jumping into alien ships and blowing them up. And if you die…give it a few seconds, and you’re back.
In Monopoly, if you did not have houses on Boardwalk, you were doomed to poverty and torture for hours…
The last time I got into a vedio game was against my husband. We were at a mall and put those helmets on and got into a Virtual Reality game.
I actually beat him. Me---the dumb blond. He was stunned for two days.
Say what you like---a woman needs a man to have confidence so if and when we are actually invaded by aliens or jihads, the woman can run to the basement and say, “Honey, you’ve had a lot of practice at shooting, I’ll wait here.”
“Pass me my old 45’s, and leave some DNA.”
Video games.
Video games…where a man can be a man again. Not only can he conquer the universe and ruthlessly slaughter and machete millions of ghouls, fight all the past and future world wars on earth and all over the galaxy---he can pretend he is Tiger Woods playing against a female with the body of a goddess, and beat her.
And every single female body on any video game is beyond belief. Where it used to be the perfect scale was 36-24-36…Laura Croft measurements alone are about 55-14-22.
I’m almost embarrassed to be in the same room with her.
This could be a problem because after so many hours of video porn the wife is going to look a bit like an overgrown pumpkin--one he might want to put up on the scoreboard.
Just think of what this is doing to all the girls who thought they’d have to grow up and look like Barbie? Good god. We need some really big, fat, video game goddesses for the girls, so when they do not grow up to be that fat, they will feel better.
Actually, I think designing video games was the necessary backlash that men used to respond to the changing culture of feminization happening all around them. I mean, come on…can you think of a better way for men to regurgitate their testosterone levels and take out all their frustrations?
You start out five-years-old killing mushrooms, and end up Al Pacino selling drugs and taking over Miami.
So, why don’t women like this stuff?
Could be, that somebody has to feed the dog. Could be, that watching 2 million aliens come at you at once and hearing machine gun fire for days actually becomes boring, not to mention annoying to women…I don’t know…you tell me.
Maybe it’s the 3-D effect that makes women really dizzy.
Men can find their ways through hundreds of complicated mazes and scenes on video, and know exactly what door to go back to--- but can’t remember what aisle the grapes are in.
My grown husband and my grown son love to sit around and play the latest video games.
They would do just that for the rest of their lives, if they didn’t have to eat.
I often walk through the room and talk…don’t ask me why.
I could say things like, “Honey, the airport was just attacked and there is a nuclear warhead heading our way.” And he would not even blink.
It usually takes at least four hours for a man playing a video game to respond to a question. It’s a great time to tell him what you bought at the mall.
It’s also works well for a good equalizer. Every time he buys a video game, you can go buy new boots. What can he say?
Just for fun, last weekend, I sat for a whole four hours and watched the boys play Halo. While I was thinking, “Who thought up this beautiful scenery, and how many hours did it take to draw it, and how do they program this stuff?” The boys were reveling in the different weapons choices.
My son got especially excited about the “hammer.” Which was just a black spear, but killed anything. This kind of confidence building was obviously very exciting.
Of course like all video games, the challenge to kill bigger and meaner enemies and go on to the next level, is the whole concept.
In Halo, you go from running around and shooting, to driving a tank and shooting, to flying a plane and shooting, to jumping into alien ships and blowing them up. And if you die…give it a few seconds, and you’re back.
In Monopoly, if you did not have houses on Boardwalk, you were doomed to poverty and torture for hours…
The last time I got into a vedio game was against my husband. We were at a mall and put those helmets on and got into a Virtual Reality game.
I actually beat him. Me---the dumb blond. He was stunned for two days.
Say what you like---a woman needs a man to have confidence so if and when we are actually invaded by aliens or jihads, the woman can run to the basement and say, “Honey, you’ve had a lot of practice at shooting, I’ll wait here.”
“Pass me my old 45’s, and leave some DNA.”
Labels: life
posted by Joyanna Adams at 2:59 PM
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