Nobody Reports: A Beyonce Breather!

Nobody Reports: While the world stock market plunged into unknowable debts today, 'President' Obama's highly trained staff of experts, were found gathered...and working hard in the President's cabinet Office of Defense...to discuss what to do if the riots of Greece come to the United States.

And as we see here, Beyonce, has really come up with something special. Like a true American, she is bound to protect her country...with this: The Beyonce Breather...a really cool looking gas mask, which is covered in diamonds, just in case you might need something to trade if things get too bad.

Production has started, and The Beyonce Breather will be sold in retail stores in time for Mother's Day, for the low price of just one million dollars a piece. All Congressmen, will of course be sent one, as needed..because in case of complete collapse...they might not make it to the bunkers!

Beyonce...working hard to save our Nation, by saving the important people first!

The Beyonce Breather...guaranteed to last for a lifetime! A mask you cannot do without!

(Also comes in emeralds or rubies for the ladies and rugged titanium, or gold for the men.)

And for a few dollars more...you can design your own!

(Nobody Makes This Stuff Up.)