Tuesday, January 30, 2007

The Horizen Project Falls Off a Dark Rift


Nobody’s Opinion:

If you have been worrying about the upcoming takeover by the “axis of evil” (Hillary, Bill, and what ever Vice President they decide to pick.) I’ve got good news for you.

Last night I heard for the first time something that will make that worry seems as unimportant as “Now, just where I did I leave my glasses?”

It’s called…The Dark Rift.

No, this is not the fight between President Bush and his thoughts of wiping Iran off the map, nor is it about Hillary’s rifts with her evil man--- it’s all about the place called the Galactic Plain: sort of a path on the cosmic dust highway we are heading for on our journey around the universe.

According to a few scientists, who say they are 100% sure about this, (which right away should tell you something) the earth is going to go crashing off this “Dark Rift” in ten years, like a bus going over a cliff.

There we will be, riding along on our little bus “earth” and then one day..wham!

We are all going to be jolted suddenly into the air while we are just walking along the parking lot at our local mall, and will get thrown off our feet, into the air about thirty feet, and who knows where we will land.

There is going to be an awful lot of swollen angles.

People in SUV’s will be protected.

Rosie O’ Donald might fall on Donald Trump.

Brittany Spears will actually be covered by falling men who will not argue over who was the father.

You see, according to these scientists, here’s how it basically works. Every so often, the earth being as cyclic as the moon and a woman’s monthly, goes over this humongous magnetic field which is caused by that pesky thing that is in the middle of all universes now (only recently mentioned to us), black holes.

And like our very own Congress, the bigger it grows, the faster it spins.

As every tax payer knows, black holes just get bigger and bigger.

This spinning “beam” of magnetic stuff coming out of the Milky Way’s black hole, which the earth passes every once in it’s meandering, will knock the mantle off, destroy all satellites, the atmosphere will be completely blown away, all the land masses will flood with huge waves of water, and one third of the population of the earth will instantly die, many of them while watching American Idol in their Malibu Homes.

The other one third will die from starvation, unless of course they learn how to eat roaches, rats, and fruitcake, which as everyone knows, survive everything.

Brent Miller has put this devastating news together for us because he wants us to…

Get ready.

First, learn how to grow your own Starbucks.

And move inland…in fact move as far inland as you can. Many scientists he said have already bought homes in Kentucky and Virginia.

John Edwards, that new Presidential candidate who looks like a boy scout, is taking this man very seriously. He is building his own mansion (for 6 million) in the heart of Virginia.

He will be ready.

Who was this guy I thought, so I followed Coast to Coast’s ( the late night radio program that he was on) leads and read that Brent Miller, just so you know, has over 30 patents on human interface recognition software. The stuff the governments are going to be using so they know exactly where each one of walking around on the earth are at every single minute of the day.

Right away I’m wondering about his “benevolent” motives to save the earth.

This is very reassuring because when this day that all the prophets talked about happens, Brent will personally be able to get everyone on earth right out in the open and up in the air to get their digital picture, which up to this time, has proved to be a bother.

Brent and his buddy sciencetists have been putting this doomsday puzzle together for quite a while he says. Taking everything that they possibly can from samples of ice at the North Pole, to studying ancient civilizations---and figuring this all out while he worked on the F-16.

He did admit that it was the sun that was causing all the recent wild weather. And that also, according to scientists, the next time Venus comes between the sun and the earth will be around June the 6th, 2012, the day the Incas and Aztecs say the earth will end.

God forbid we have a solar surge then he said because we will be fried, due to the fact that Venus will somehow cause the flare to become that much hotter.

And then, the scientist started doing what every liberal in the world says is an absolute no-no…he started reading from revelations in the Bible to prove his point.

The tsunami waves will be so big, that most of Asia will be wiped off the map.

Ten years is not a very long time to get our stuff together. I have to learn how to grow food in my back yard, learn how to live without my computers, and learn how to ice skate.

It might take me ten years just to learn how to cook without an oven. I have trouble cooking with the one in my kitchen. I might just have to settle for dog food covered in chocolate.

I saw Michio Kaku today on the Science channel today talking about what the world will be like in 2056. Somehow, Michio did not seem too upset about this Catastrophic Cycle which is coming at us so fast. In fact, he didn’t even mention it.

Could Michio not be aware? Wouldn’t he be the first one to tell us if this was real?

Brent says that’s the trouble, only a very few people on the earth know about the final days on the earth. People just don’t want to believe it.

Maybe that’s because the catastrophic cycle of the upcoming Presidential elections seem much more threatening right now.

This nobody suggests that we should at least make Mr. Miller get together and debate this with Al Gore---and may the best man win.

After all, Al Gore has already made his movie, Brent better catch up. He could call it “Inconveniently Revising the Inconvenient Truth.”

While I conveniently not bother to see either one.

In the meantime, I’m going to practice jumping and falling down with grace.

Nobody’s Perfect; Let’s just say, that this guy is right (not that I’m saying)...that would mean that Bill and Hillary Clinton know what’s coming, and know that to reverse our whole humanity into windmills energy will be the smart thing to do, because everything else will be completely destroyed.

That would make them actually good people for caring, I suppose….

What am I drinking?

Nobody Knows; Brent does make a good point about how we should be having very knowledgeable people gathering information from all the scientists and looking for patterns or answers.

Anyone who has been to a doctor lately knows that this specialization stuff can kill ya.

Nobody Cares; So, what are we going to do if this happens? Dig tunnels? Stock up on food and water for six months. Refuse to pay any more taxes? Start fights NOW with the inlaws we hate?

Maybe the “powers” that be have decided that Y2K and the electrical grids going down are not working. Too many of us are buying big digital screen TV in order to watch football instead of stocking up on six months supplies of food and water.

To get us to start doing that has been pretty difficult so what better why than to make up another horror doomsday story, like the earth getting smacked around by a gigantic intergalactic big black hole bat?

I wonder if Jack Bauer will be in the movie.

Nobody’s Fool: Having said all that, if you have read any Mike LaSalle’s stuff on the universe…there could be something to this.

Mike? Any thoughts?

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