Friday, November 19, 2010

The Punch Line to Planet X: No Rednecks Allowed.





Nobody Flashes: You haven't lived until you've listened to the radio broadcast of Coast to Coast, with George Noory at night. I have learned the most amazing things on his program, and since I'm a bona-fide nighthawk, fluttering all my pop-junk well into the quiet night, I always have him on.

And tonight, I heard this guy named Gordon Jones and I was...zapped.

By this: Look at this picture of the sun rising. See the "shape" next to the sun? Well, that, according to a man named Gordon Jones---that's the Planet X.

And it's BIG. And it's...going to flip the earth in a polar shift, while traveling AWAY from us. And this will happen...oh....about 8 weeks from now, or sometime soon next year. (Hopefully before Obama's state of the union address)

India, will disappear, in a hour. The entire coast of California and South America will RISE...because the Teutonic plates underneath them will shove them up and make mountains.

Same thing is going to happen in Australia, from the west. Tasmania will get much warmer. The Madrid fault will go bananas.

And Colorado will be the main military complex where all the big guys will go to survive, but DON'T go there unless you want to live under Nancy Pelosi..no he didn't say that, but, I bet she'll be there before anybody else.

I was really getting into this. After all, it was the most exciting news since Prince Charles announced that Camilla was going to be Queen of England. (By the way, what if Charles dies, and she is left Queen? ) England will be all Muslims by 2060 anyway so we won't worry about them right now.

But, back to our future.

Gordon had me in the palm of his mighty voice....at, "They aren't telling you anything, but they have known for years and that's why Glenn Beck is trying to prepare everyone for the future with canning. Canning food is the future. "

Okay, I've got that covered. Since I have trouble not burning water, I have to improvise.
( I mean, who wants to stand over a stove and watch water boil? Not me.) My neighbor just took my crap apple tree and made canned jelly. And Pattie, my old new best friend, told me today SHE can and make corn bread, something that I am determined to do some day. Mona, my new best friend ( I will have a LOT of best friends in the future...) can cook anything that moves, including old trees, and everything is going to be moving....

And ALL these ladies can "can" food, all we will need is...the food.

Good luck with that after the pole shift.

But...back to the future.

Gordon kept talking and he had me already thinking: Maybe there is something to this....and then...the punch line: Living here among us are six billion cloned aliens. And they are in the oceans, and parallel universes, just READY to pop in when this happens.

HARP is disguising their mother ships from us.

What's so great about all this, is the ability of George Noory to interview some of these people with the utmost respect. He never laughs at them. Never. Truly...who could interview some guy saying things like...

George: "What percent of ET's are not nice?"

Gordon: "Weill, about 90 percent are not selfish, and 10 percent are selfish."

Six billion people are not selfish? That's nice to know.

You seen their planet was destroyed by sex and emotion. (I know, I know) So they came here looking for a home, and they decided they had it wrong...they should have just had greater sex and greater emotion.

Oh....that's great news for Tiger Woods.

Nobody Flashes Update: D.C. will be a volcano. Watch the ashes.

And North Carolina will be in trouble because of the selfishness and FIREPOWER of the people. He actually said that. Never mind the earth flipping on its polar head, it's those hillbillies you have to watch out for!

I might have to move there.

Now. Let's get serious.

After this pole shift, the tip of Brazil will be the new North Pole, so I figure Missouri is going to have the weather of Costa Rica.

I'm getting pretty excited about this.

And Gordon's main philosophy is the same as Glenn Beck. "Don't be selfish with your canned food" .... or the aliens will not like it.

Glenn Beck is gathering food for himself. Really. He has millions of dollars, and he is afraid of being without food?

Mmmmmmm.

So, if you see the skies getting dark, and look up and see a another planet in the sky as big as the moon...

I suggest: lots of beer. And give one to the man from Planet X...to show you're not a selfish human, he might just let you live. That's the card to get into their new world.

Rednecks are not allowed, but there will be a body scan.

I've given this a lot of thought. I guess I'll just have to boil the water.

Labels:

6 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Amfortas says:

So, Tasmania is going to get warmer in eight weeks time. I should hope so, Summer is almost here.

I am usually basking on the beach in January.

Western Australia has always been threatening to go its own way. It has most of the mineral wealth and the Kalgoorlie gold miners were not at all happy about joining the Commonwealth of Australia back in 1901 when Oz was born. (bet you didn't know Australia was so young).

I look forward to seeing what Gloriana Julia will do when the big swing happens. She goes on and on about Global Warming, She will probably demand a tax on Planet X, unless Obama annexes it.

11:20 PM  
Blogger Joyanna Adams said...

So, Australia was born in 1901...

Good to know.

When it flips, YOU will be on top, and can demand the new Opera center be moved from Sydney.

4:50 PM  
Blogger oakleyses said...

louis vuitton outlet online, kate spade handbags, ray ban sunglasses, kate spade outlet online, prada outlet, michael kors outlet, coach outlet store online, nike shoes, nike air max, jordan shoes, nike free, polo ralph lauren, christian louboutin shoes, longchamp outlet, michael kors outlet online, longchamp handbags, gucci handbags, longchamp outlet online, polo ralph lauren outlet, michael kors outlet store, michael kors outlet online, oakley vault, red bottom shoes, prada handbags, tory burch outlet, cheap oakley sunglasses, michael kors outlet online, burberry outlet online, chanel handbags, oakley sunglasses, burberry outlet online, coach purses, louis vuitton outlet, christian louboutin outlet, tiffany jewelry, coach outlet, nike air max, tiffany and co jewelry, ray ban outlet, louboutin shoes, louis vuitton handbags, michael kors outlet online, louis vuitton, coach outlet, louis vuitton outlet

12:18 AM  
Blogger oakleyses said...

giuseppe zanotti, insanity workout, canada goose, valentino shoes, bottega veneta, new balance outlet, canada goose pas cher, marc jacobs outlet, moncler, asics shoes, beats headphones, hollister, reebok shoes, ugg boots, canada goose outlet, vans outlet, rolex watches, ugg outlet, moncler outlet, canada goose outlet, mac cosmetics, lululemon outlet, uggs outlet, wedding dresses, ferragamo shoes, soccer shoes, babyliss pro, north face outlet, mont blanc pens, jimmy choo shoes, mcm handbags, longchamp, ugg, canada goose uk, soccer jerseys, ghd, birkin bag, uggs on sale, celine handbags, moncler, nfl jerseys, roshe run, chi flat iron, instyler ionic styler, herve leger, p90x workout, ugg soldes, abercrombie and fitch, north face jackets, canada goose outlet

12:19 AM  
Blogger oakleyses said...

north face, sac michael kors, abercrombie and fitch, scarpe hogan, nike air max, hollister, louis vuitton, nike free, true religion outlet, ray ban uk, vans pas cher, oakley pas cher, ray ban pas cher, lululemon, hollister, air max pas cher, michael kors canada, north face pas cher, air jordan, longchamp pas cher, nike trainers, nike free pas cher, hermes pas cher, air max, sac louis vuitton, true religion outlet, guess pas cher, converse pas cher, true religion, mulberry, nike huarache, timberland, ralph lauren pas cher, burberry pas cher, nike air force, sac vanessa bruno, lacoste pas cher, louis vuitton uk, nike roshe run, chaussure louboutin, longchamp, ralph lauren, barbour, nike roshe, nike blazer pas cher, michael kors uk, tn pas cher, new balance pas cher, louis vuitton pas cher, nike air max

12:20 AM  
Blogger Xianjun Ranqin said...

qihang0923,cheap uggs
nike roshe run
instyler curling iron
oakley sunglasses wholesale
oakley sunglases cheap
hermes uk
ugg sale
cheap ray ban sunglasses
vans shoes
michael kors outlet online
longchamp handbags
pandora
air force 1
ray ban sunglasses
uggs on sale
prada uk
louis vuitton handbags
mont blanc
mulberry handbags
soccer shoes
cheap uggs boots
kobe bryant shoes
kate spade outlet
longchamp outlet
nike elite socks
nike free runs
hollister kids
tory burch outlet
moncler outlet
adidas shoes
mizuno running shoes
oakley sunglasses
louis vuitton
mcm outlet
gucci
louboutin pas cher
retro jordans
coach outlet
q

8:42 PM  

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home