Roseanne Barr's Pack With the Devil

Nobody Knows just how many hundreds of Congressional interns are working overtime tonight, writing up bills to be introduced to contain the next madmen in America from another horrific killing of a politician. Guns should be banned (they will try) and it is being shouted by all liberals that those dangerous tea party folks and talk show hosts will just have to stop criticizing their government. One is already being written to banish certain "symbols."

It's gone too far, and Chris Mathews leg is going numb from the pain.

Many in the media, after reading the Arizona's killer rambling words, and seeing his 'Satanic" alter at his house, are admitting, he's a wacko. Nothing he said, or the shrine makes any sense, whatsoever....

Kinda of like...Roseanne Barr.

As we see from the killer's back yard, we can only assume that he was a Satanic worshipper. You also have to wonder just how widespread this skull worshipping is? (Can you say...Skull and Bones?)

Shouldn't we check into that bastion of Harvard and Yale lair? Is there devil worshipping going on there? (Do we need to even ask?)

And surprise, surprise! Guess who else made a pack with devil?

Roseanne Barr.

Yes, on Craig Ferguson's Show last night, she admitted that when she was twelve she made a pack with the devil that she wanted to be famous, and that's why she became famous.

(That's the devil eating Rosanne's soul at twelve.)

Well, at least we can't blame God anymore.

(See hilarious interview with Ferguson on her blog.--scroll down to middle.)

Rosanne goes on to say that she later tried to get the devil to renege on her deal at Spago's. You have to read her book to find out if he gave her back her soul, but she hints that he did.

I'm not so sure. I'm not convinced that the Devil let her go. Check out the cover of her new book: Dispatches From the Nut Farm.

Yes: Roseanne has a nut farm. She plans to get everyone to eat her MACH nuts, and become a vegetarian like her. She personally has cut down over 3,000 Ironweed trees to save her nuts.

I'd say the cover is proof she is still working for Satan...or Chavez, or Castro, or Chris Matthews, or all three.

And she hates Sarah Palin.

Barr: "I think she's a loon and I think she's kind of a traitor to this country because she would love to erase the line between church and state, which I think this country was founded upon and should never, ever be trifled with in any way."

Huh?

BARR: "Dick Cheney. He never worked a day in his life."

That's an anti-government rant, just like that guy in Arizona. Someone call Homeland Security.

Right. Dick Cheney never worked. Right.

BARR: But the Tea Party is owned by the richest people in the world. Come on..All you Tea Party spokespeople, you work for the Koch brothers and they’re like billionaires.

Okay..who are the Koch brothers? I want to know. I want some money.

She said this while arguing with Ted Nugent. You want to see some more nonsense? Go here.

Rosanne always puts her foot in her mouth...she said she was sorry for insulting the stupid Tea Party people, and blaming the media and religion for Marie's Osmond's son's suicide

"It just flew out of my mouth"...much like the worst rendition of our National Anthem ever
recorded. Oh, that was the devil's fault, not hers.

And here's a most famous quote that did not fly out of her mouth..

Actually, it came out the other end.:

BARR: I'm tired of watching as men destroy all the world. Everything used to be beautiful when women were in charge, (Nobody asks: When were women in charge? I wanna know what planet she is talking about.) and now I, working as the physical manifestation of the goddess Isis and the reincarnation of Cleopatra, have decided to save the world

She say this on her blog.
I know...scary. Let's pray.

Isis and Cleopatra? What's that make Gore...Zeus and Anthony?

I think Homeland Security should raid that nut farm...and find the skulls

With all the money she has, no doubt you might find this one-of-a kind, Damien Hirst's original--a real child's skull incased with 8,000 pink and white diamonds.

After all...Roseanne made a pack with the Devil...and it made her not only famous.. but rich.

What's this all mean? I'm not sure I wanna go there. My whole body feels numb.

I think someone should introduce a bill to send Roseanne Barr to Cuba...let her grow her nuts down there. The Devil loves company.