Friday, January 04, 2008

Thank You Iowa!



Nobody Flashes Anymore: After the damage was done to Hillary's hopes for an Iowa win, some of her helpers, who had worked day and night in order help their candidate, had become a bit...frustrated.

This abandoned office shows the feelings of Hillary's vast army of hopefuls, after learning that she had actually obtained, third place.

For this, we thank the Deocratic women of Iowa, Oprah Winfrey, and Bill Clinton, who insisted on upsetting Oprah by demanding she let him appear on her show on Thanksgiving.

The rumors that this is actually one of Bill's crime scene has not been confirmed at this time.

But, we must remember. Oprah showed us what a woman can do if she gets really mad.

Let's just be glad Hillary Clinton did not have the football.

Thank you Iowa!

Labels:

Thursday, January 03, 2008

Starbucking in Iowa


Nobody’s Opinion; This is nuts. American Idol was such a smash hit, that now the big boys have decided to put on its equivalent daily---American Candidates.

I don’t know about you, but I think everyone in the process is overdosing on caffeine. I wouldn’t doubt if Iowans were given free caffeine donuts before Thursday night. How else are you going to get them to go out, risking frostbite, and lost paychecks, just to go ‘caucusing’?

Caffeinate them with coffee and lots of hope…oh, and free babysitting.

The once manufacturing country of America is desperate. We've became a “service” nation. Now the “service” jobs are outsourced, and even Pizza’s Huts are closing shops. How else can you make a living?

Nobody’s building houses---nobody building businesses---but you can always get a job in the government, and if not, don’t worry. They will pay you anyway.

That’s their message.

And have you noticed? Not one of the top contending politicians in Iowa were talking about the most important subject of all to most of us who would like to buy a Starbucks once in a while…immigration. The reason they gave? There are no immigrants in Iowa.

What…immigrants pick grapes don’t they? Why not corn? Who’s keeping them out?

Politicians?

They also did touch the subject of global warming. Do you think the sub-zero weather had anything to do with it?

There were so many out-of town political pundits flying high on Starbucks in Iowa, that the locals, who skip coffee at Starbucks for the better bargain of two Happy Meals, will be getting energy rushes from the water supply alone.

So what does a sensible American think about this?

Let’s start with the Democrats---the party that on any other day makes fun of ‘ignorant’ farmers and ‘dumb’ rednecks.

Hillary is now an angel. I say that because in her last commercial her face was so spectacular the only thing missing was the halo. According to the locals…Hillary is cruel to chickens. Due to the huge corporate government subsidized farms which her husband helped put in, poor little chickens are freezing in their tiny little pens.

Hillary needed support, so the Mayor of Los Angeles flew out for coffee. The good news for her is---her PR has already got it covered. If Hillary comes in third place, she still wins.

I just love the Clintons.

Edwards on the other hand is being smart by talking about how the corporations are ruining our lives and getting rich off us --- true. He mentioned that Hillary is in bed with all the pharmaceuticals companies, but why he failed to mention that she also has big ties to China, is beyond me. The Saudi’s practically built her husband’s global institutional library. Not to mention, it was only a little while ago that we learned that she served on the board of Wal-Mart for years.

Obama…well, he’s playing it straight, but---how can you trust a man who “dishes” his white mother and grandparents who helped him become the obvious talent that he is, while continuing to call yourself black? His black father left him and his mother cold.

So, being a white mother myself, I don’t appreciate it.

It’s not a racial issue; it’s a truth and respect issue.

On the Republicans;

Romney is a billionaire who will spend half his money to become president, which makes you wonder. Just how bright is that? Either he is an idiot, or he knows his billions will multiply into trillions. A Mormon who claims he is a one-woman man, but endorses a religion who agrees with Islam. Men should have multiply wives, and these wives should stay quiet. The whole state of Utah is rooting for him.

Huckabee---well, I keep looking for Bill Clinton, who is a good friend of the old boy. I can just hear Bill saying, “Go play the bass on Leno, Huck. Hey…it got me elected!"

I look for Huckabee to be the Clintons’ third party choice.

McCain has given it up and moved on to New Hampshire, and Thompson, in this world of entertainment, just didn’t take enough coffee breaks.

And then there’s Rudy. Since only 85 per-cent of Republicans vote in Iowa, he seems to have made the best move.

This is only the beginning folks. We have a whole year of American Candidate coming. I suggest buying stock in Starbucks and Ambien.

We gotta make a living somehow.

Labels:

Wednesday, January 02, 2008

Leave IOWA Alone...

Nobody Flashes Anymore; It's the day after New Years, and the media is once again manipulating a whole bunch of people into...ooo...who is going to win in Iowa?!

Can't they leave those poor people alone?

Does it really matter who wins? Are we sure that a handful of idiots spending millions upon millions to win a very tiny little state aren't exactly, most probably...insane?

Does it scare you what this might actually mean if you happen to think about it?

I'd advise you against it. Go snowboarding instead. In fact, if you live in Iowa...throw snowballs at the candidates so we might all be able to see on FOX how they all handle themselves when attacked....

Would you spend $70 million for a caucus? Would any smart businessman?

So, does this mean that if you are President, you plan to triple your investment? mmmm?

Just wondering.

Anyway...I was reading around and found an article that the guys should love.

Yes--- here is a pretty good write by Mike Adams about the hypocrisy of feminists...if you missed it, give it a read.

Labels:

Tuesday, January 01, 2008

On a Bed Of Roses


Nobody’s Opinion: It’s an American tradition around our house. New Year’s Day, everyone lies around in their pajamas, eats junk food, and watches TV. In my case, I usually watch the Rose Parade and then Twilight Zone reruns. But this year, they actually merged into one big unknown space of---What kind of “international globalization, let’s all merge into one big happy family melting pot New World Order” twilight zone is this?

I’m talking about the 119th Tournament of Roses Parade. You know---the one that started out as an all-American celebration of football and flowers?

Thank goodness I had Rod Serling to help me figure it out.

The parade theme this year was “Passport to the World’s Celebrations,” which someone in some vast governmental Sims City office somewhere (probably in Dubai) decided that this particular parade, which millions all over the world would be watching, was the perfect time to get us all feeling a little more enthusiastic about this ‘One World International Government rules by a handful of politicians and political leaders’ stuff.

Think I’m crazy?

The president of the parade---CL Keely---who by the way, has a Masters in International Relations, a Masters in Business, and has spent years in Hong Kong, said:

“I want our parade to give people a glimpse at other festive traditions around the world.”

A glimpse? Try more like overkill.
China had more floats and awards than any other country, including us. We heard a Swiss Army Band, (to honor the bankers no doubt) and there were three “green” displays---the funniest one being replicas of the boats in the Los Angeles harbor which displayed huge electrical sockets in their rears to show that now the ports deliver green electrical power for the ships at sea. The sockets looked as tall as twenty foot waves--- making sure that all the kids in the world will now think all boats are run by electric, just plug em’ in!

And bless their hearts---the Japanese sent a “green” band, which was going to play the next day and donate the proceeds to help the people whose homes were burned by recent fires in San Diego…which of course were caused by global warming, not arsonists, although they suspected arson in most of the fires.

In order for us to be equal with the world and make them feel better about us, I suppose we have to now take charity. Thanks Japan, Chevez

Next thing you know, Ahmadinejad will be sending us bottled water.

The last half of the parade was devoted to the Latinos. It went something like this: American band playing John Phillips Sousa…China float: American band playing Anchors Away…China float with rat: American band playing God Bless America…China float with stupid looking dolls: American band playing Stars and Stripes…here comes the Sombreros! Buenos!

At first, I was really mad that this American parade had been taken over to promote China and the Latinos’--- but when I heard all the bands playing The Stars and Stripes, I beamed. Well, I thought...at least all the band directors were still patriotic.

Later, after watching an episode of the Twilight Zone called, “No. 12 Looks Just Like You,” did I realize that it was just our government’s way of bringing in our corporate merging with China, and our physical “merging” with Mexico---on a bed of roses.

Or should I say, a “carrot” of rosy optimism.

In this brilliant Twilight Zone futuristic episode, the leaders have decided that in order to get rid of injustice forever, all the people must go through plastic surgery to look alike. There is one girl who is quite happy with the way she looks, and does not want to be forced into this procedure. She remembers reading books like Shakespeare, and Keats…banned books. She wants no part of the transformation.

The leaders tell her, “No one has ever been forced to take “transformation” if you don’t want it. The important thing is to discover why you don’t want it and then make the necessary corrections.”

Of course, she is “transformed” anyway into a real plastic surgery beauty, with the brain of a pea. She was stupid and wonderfully happy.
Too bad the Rose Parade wasn't an episode of the Twilight Zone. No, this is real time---not the premonistic warnings of great writers foreseeing our future.
By the end of the day, I had no doubt, this year the Rose Parade was just one of the necessary corrections being used to transform a reluctant America into 'their' new world vision of One World utopia.

A transformation being done--- on a bed of roses.

Labels:

Monday, December 31, 2007

Global Warming...2008



Nobody's Opinion: Now, here is what it's all about. Whenever you hear about the global warming doom and gloom this upcoming year, remember this picture.

This is not Japan. This is a park in Canada. And if I must say, a great vision to start the year off with.

And if this is an example of God's sweet earth being destroyed by "carbon dioxide" and too much heat...then I say...maybe we need more, not less.

Happy New Year to everyone at MND. You're all the best! Each and every one of you.

Labels:

Sunday, December 30, 2007

Keep On Grinding!


Nobody Reports on a Monday:

Keep Grinding!

Nobody’s Opinion: I cannot even believe it’s the last day of 2007. I just read that the ball falling in Times Square is going to be green, a law was just signed that says we all have to switch our old light bulbs to the more expensive ones being made, of course by GE, by 2012, and that the U.S. Postal office is going to honor Chinese astrology by putting “The Year of the Rat” on a new stamp.

And if you blame any of these ridiculous changes on President George W. Bush, I envy you…because you either slept through the last year, or were too drunk to care. The rest of us have been having a pretty hard time between candidate polling updates, Viagra ads, Bill Clinton sucking up to his wife, and wondering just when Brad Pitt was going to get rid of Angelina Jolie and go save poor Brittany Spears, who obviously is an alien.

But, synchronicity in this God’s universe can be a beautiful thing because “The Year of the Rats” could not describe more succinctly our upcoming national presidential campaign that we will be forced to endure.

That and the premonition that Al Gore is just warming up.

Nobody’s Perfect: Okay, that’s me. I can’t for the life of me figure out how so many billions of people on the earth can possible think that when family members keep succeeding other family members in government, when the law says they cannot serve anymore---how is that ANY different than the British monarchy and kings of old?

In Pakistan, a 19-year old boy is going to replace his assassinated mother, in name only, because dear old dad could not be elected because he was tried and convicted, but he will run the show again…and...Huh? While here in America, an ex-President will run his wife and she will give him full power to serve with her…and all this in the name of democracy? I’m confused.

To me it isn’t any different than the heritary kings of old, the system our forefathers were trying to get rid of.

Sure they hold elections, but they shouldn’t be allowed to even run. I just don’t get it.

Nobody Knows; The center of the Western World now seems to reside in Dubai. The New York Times reported that the wealthiest men from Wall Street took their yearly traditional party to honor the best Dealmakers of the year from New York, and moved it to the Burj al Arab Hotel. All the big boys---Goldman Sacks, JP Morgan, Morgan Stanly--- got to pat themselves on the back between the sands of the crescent moons.

The day I started writing was the day that President George W. Bush wanted to sell all the American ports to Dubai, and tried to warn us that we had better do it.

So what happened ? Did George Bush Jr. lose our ports to some sheik in a bad game of Texas Hold Em’ at some Dubai Hotel?

Nobody Cares; There is good news! Rap music is losing its luster! Recording sales have gone down 21 % since 2005. But the boys are going to keep on grinding…that is if they can keep alive. Pimp C, was found dead in his hotel room---which makes you wonder what happened to Pimp A and Pimp B. And then his friend Bun B had a hard time dealing with it. Anyway you look at it; I certainly would go for a little less rap and a little more real music again.

Nobody Wins: Osama bin has made another statement about “blood for blood” and wiping Israel off the map. Really. You think this man would get a life by now. And any candidate that says they are going to use “diplomacy” with some of these idiots will be following the way of the recent Bhutto, who said, “I’m not making deals with the military, I’m having a dialogue with them about how we can get a transition to democracy.”

That went well.

Nobody’s Fool: Well, one thing for sure, in the next year Obama will keep saying he’s “black,” Hillary will keep saying she has “experience,” Al Gore will keep saying we’re all going to die…

The world will still have too many fools who are going to believe it all.

But not this one. I plan to barbeque.

Happy New Year Everyone! Independence Forever!

Labels: