Friday, March 30, 2007

A REAL Man's Release

: Nobody Flashes

From a real woman's point of view, there is nothing quite as sexy as a hot tub.

And a man with a gun in a hot tub, is almost too much machismo to keep a good woman down.

The hat on the other hand, could use a logo, like maybe a skull with bones.

Here in Missouri, when a man starts thinking about his x-wife, he gets in a nice hot tub and practices picking off rabbits.

Sometimes he just shoots beer bottles, or car bumpers... All in all, it seems to work, and makes for a relaxing afternoon...

The only thing he lacks in life is pizza delivery, because no one will come to his house, due to the fact that in the field behind his house, empty pizza boxes have been found shot to pieces.

This particular man, happened to be the same man who taught Dick Cheny how to shoot while under pressure, and because of this, I've been meaning to ask him over to have a hot tub shooting session. After all, Dick Cheny did not kill his friend.

But my husband says the man has a drinking problem.

Guess I'll just have to hot tub alone.

But, like I said...hot tub, man with gun...all a good woman needs is handcuffs and tequila.

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Sometimes A Synchronicity


Nobody’s Opinion: Sometimes in the course of history, it’s hard to tell just what a coincidence is, what may have happened due to a planned course, or what is just one person’s opinion (usually a historian, but lately, talk-show turned historical interpreter, Rosie O’Donnell) in evaluating circumstantial evidence surrounding historical situations.

So yesterday, when the Senate of the United States, voted with the House to end the war in Iraq, on the very same day (March 29, 1973) when the United States military pulled out of Vietnam, one wonders if the day was picked as a symbolic message by Ted Kennedy and Nancy Pelosi to once again associate the war in Iraq with the war in Vietnam---or was it just a coincidence? The New York Times made it a point to remind everyone of the importance of the day.

Being as the New York Times is far-left leaning, it would be logical to believe it was planned that way.

But sometimes, synchronicities just happen out of the blue, like today.

I’ve been reading about George Orwell’s time spent at Eton, England, a public school for the elites. The school is just north of Windsor Castle; the year of his first attendance started in 1917. England was in its third year of war.

Eton, for those of you who my not know (or care to know) is the highest training school for boys in Britain. It was started by Henry VI, and has been the training ground for 19 former British Prime Ministers, and most all of the Foreign Affairs Ministers, not to mention Kings of other countries.

It is the training ground for the ruling class of Western Civilization, the crème de la crème. William and Harry, the current princes both went there.

In the book, The Unknown Orwell, (by Peter Stansky and William Abrahams) I came across an interesting point by the authors of the book…which I presume to ask for forgiveness for quoting so much of here: but I don’t see how else to share it.

George Orwell (The famous author of 1984) was going to Eton when the First World War broke out. And at first, like our situation here after 9/11, the English people were full of patriotism, and nationalism.

Words now considered in America by certain rulers of our country, in the present year of 2007, to be very nasty.

But then the war dragged on… and on. People got tired of it.

Even though Eton was famous for the patriotic representation of all that is England, the students of Eton, by the end of the war, had had, in Orwell’s words, “a queer revolution.”

Here’s a passage:

“The cost for England of the war she had won was almost 800,000 dead, a generation of young men decimated. The fact would seem sufficient to explain the “bad temper,” as Orwell puts it, among those under forty. No other British army felt itself so betrayed, or so scorned the causes for which it fought. In that mood the post-war generation rejected altogether the world-before-the-war, its propriety, its overstuffed luxury, its conceptions of society and manners, and its confidence in England and in Progress.” (Sound familiar?)

“Orwell’s pointed out, that fifteen out of sixteen boys in his class, marched out of Eton and enrolled in the Communist party of Great Britain. The discussions at the school ranged from “humanitarianism” down to “free love, divorce-reform, atheism (and) birth-control.” (Remember, this is 1916)


My point in the synchronicity of the passage is that the breeding grounds of many of the top universities of both England and the United States have for far too many years been the breeding grounds for the concepts of communism. They just don’t call it that. These same elite people, from the richest families, go on to be placed in the highest positions of government.

This is not a Rosie O’Donnell rant for ratings, it’s an historical fact.

Bill Clinton and Hillary Clinton, have much the same mind-set as the Etonian schoolboys from 1917. Our universities of the 1960’s, much like the mindset of the universities in England after WWI, were full of what can only be frankly called, hot-beds of Marxism. Bill Clinton went from Harvard to Oxford, and made sure his daughter studied at Oxford also.

The problem with the American people not recognizing Marxists when they are right in front of their face every day is because our educational system did not allow discourse on the different forms of government. This explains why teachers who ban Lego’s think they are being fair. The teacher’s education is so bad; they think they are just being nice.

But, back to the subject; The Eton boys from Orwell’s class had seen many of their classmates killed, much like the baby boomers witnessing the seemingly wasted lives lost in Vietnam.

Vietnam has been put down by most historians until recently as the United States’ biggest “defeat,” bought to an end with the indoctrination of what George Orwell would have called the “bolshies.” Jane Fonda, Abbe Hoffman…you know the names. Jane Fonda may deny it, but she is about as close to a communist as you can get.

We now are finding out that we COULD have won that war, but for the political leanings running the Congress. What a waste.

Did we need that war? After all, we were not attacked. Jane Fonda seemed too many people at the time, right. Until she thought she'd win us over with the famous photo-op on the guns: Not exactly the brightest daughter of an America star.

Movie stars are the communist favorite tools. The rich, who could never even imagine being told what to do because of the class they are in, cannot for the life of themselves, understand the concept of freedom, I guess.

The only freedom they have lost is not going to a regular mall without being mobbed.

They honestly “feel” for the little guy, and want to help all that suffer. So in that respect, Karl Marx, makes a lot of sense to them. Redistribution of wealth is the answer…just don't redistribute their money, only they have the right to do that.

And war…they just hate war. And don’t we all.

Still, it’s one thing to hate war, and rebel against the leaders, the policies, and the seemingly senseless scarifies of our young American boys, for some esoteric plan to spread “democracy” throughout the Middle East, an impossible plan even for a nation of 100 billion let alone 360 million.

It’s quite another to retreat from an enemy because of the horror of it all, to ignore the long historical history of the Islamic Muslims and how they approach their life, which is by their faith. They are not shy about expressing their plans for world domination. And they are not the only ones planning to takeover Western Civilization, so is China.

After all, THIS time, we were attacked. Easy enough for the powerful to forget, they have stock options.

Nevertheless, since it is true that it is the normal and brave soldiers that sacrifice for their countries, for the LOVE of their country, it’s important that we have leaders that don’t sign onto the usual communist’s dogma. Even if they have no idea, as in Rosie’s case, what a communist is. Or if they actually DO know, and get in bed with them.

It’s very vital, at this time in our history, that the American people get educated and learn the elements of tyranny, learn to recognize Marxists among our leaders, and start fighting for our independence from tyrants…again.

It’s important for Americans to know that Marxists will put us in danger. England, because of its “liberal” policies endorsed by the ruling classes for so long, is about to disappear to the tyrants of Islam, and there are too many “liberals” in our government who will help them.

They are being taking over from within. For all their elite education, the rulers feel protected.

Having said this, it seems important, when we have a situation of captured British soldiers in Iran, an arsenal of our navy ready to strike, a nutcase in Iran, and our supposed ally the Saudi King, turning against us and joining with his fellow Muslims, that we stand united as a country.

If ever there was a time to be united, it’s now.

Our Senate deprived us of that today. Once again, we are the fools of the world, because of our “educated” elite of both parties, the ruling oligarchs who fight over everything, not for the people they represent, but for power.

Our government, both the Democrats and the Republicans, have put America on the brink of destruction. The wealth and power have gotten completely out-of-hand.

Not to say that there couldn’t be an “elite” to put the country back on course.

What America needs now, is an American Winston Churchill, who by the way, went to Eton. As far as we can see, there is no such person in either party…or else they have not come forward.

We are instead offered up, the seeds that were sown in the soil of One World Fascist Government. The G8 meetings, the WTO meetings, the Kyoto meetings, the United Nations, they all get together, the new and powerful of the world.

And they are not discussing what five-star restaurant they prefer to eat at.

They are discussing the seeds of the 1984 novel: George Orwell’s vision of Big Brother. And even though it seems that to other countries, we are now that Big Brother…compare those other countries to us.

They really shouldn’t talk.

We Americans, no matter what party we claim to be for, those of us underneath the ruling classes, still have freedom in our hearts, handed down by our fathers and mothers, and their fathers and mothers before them---and it is the American soldiers that represent us now, not our rulers. They are our crème of the crop. The true Etonians of the 21st century: they are the ones who are carrying the load.

They are the best of what’s left of all that America stands for, and they need us now.

Bring them home---and there will still be wars, or they will just be sent somewhere else. The globalization of the world is already been put in place, and it’s not about to stop. Bill Clinton had our military all OVER the planet, so will Hillary. They are no different than President Bush.

The difference is, as true Marxists, they will send troops to other countries and instead of being truthful and calling them soldiers, they will call them, as Clinton did before…“peace keepers.”

John Adams once said: “Whenever a general knowledge and sensibility have prevailed among the people, arbitrary government and every kind of oppression have lessened and disappeared in proportion. Man has certainly an exalted soul; and the same principle in human nature,--that aspiring, noble principle founded in benevolence, and cherished by knowledge; I mean the love of power, which has been so often the cause of slavery, has whenever freedom has existed, been the cause of freedom.”

“The poor people have been much less successful than the great. They have seldom found either leisure or opportunity to form a union and exert their strength. They have seldom been able to frame and support a regular opposition. “

But sometimes, in the course of history, a nation rises up and claims its rights. We did it once before. We need to do it once again. Certainly, none of us want to go back into the dark ages with Al Gore.

And in this world where every day we get so much propaganda and misinformation from both sides of the isle, it’s hard to tell if Bush lied, if the war is just, if there are “enemies” within as Savage says, or if the destruction of the United States WAS planned with help from enemies within, Rosie has a right to suspect. She just never looks to her own party.
Rosie is woefully uneducated.

If we look to history we find that there are very likely traitors from each party all over our government…with trillions floating around to bribe? Who are we kidding?
We are just becoming numb to it all, and besides, we all feel powerless. (This is exactly the point)

History is full of traitors. Ben Franklin’s two main secretaries in France were both British spies. Historically speaking, it’s not without precedent. And the fact that Sandy Berger can fill up his socks full of secrets, with only silence from our elite rulers, shows just how much they can all be trusted.
The secrets hidden in the halls of power would probably shame us to eternity.

Only historians, very far into the future will be able to tell what was planned, who was in on it, and the many complex scenarios and bargains that went on behind the scenes. Scandals from both sides are almost daily entertainment.

One thing is sure, our government, no matter what exorbrient platitudes come out of their mouths, is not listening to us on anything. And if we the people don’t take our government back, then who will?

If we don’t do it soon, 1984 won’t be just a popular novel written by a talented Etonian. It will be real.

I’d rather have a synchronicity, wouldn’t you?

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Wednesday, March 28, 2007

The "Force" Is With Them


Nobody’s Opinion: Two American Institutions are joining together this year to bring us some fun, the United States Post Office and George Lucas.

Just when you thought that there was not one single item left in the universe for George Lucas to slap his licensing on out of all his Star Wars characters---think again.

Star Wars and all its characters have been resurrected on so many toys, lunch boxes, dolls, video games, and bedspreads over the last thirty years that George Lucas did not have to lift another finger to work after his first trilogy. He made his huge fortune off the Star Wars merchandising. In fact, I’m sure he made enough money to buy property on Mars, AND the moon, and build a few movie theaters for his private screenings on the shuttle that will take him there.

I haven’t Googled it, but I’d make a Star Trekie bet that Star Wars is the hugest brand of merchandise in the world. Every house on the planet has something from the movie, and if not, they have the first set of VHS tapes, the second set of VHS tapes, and then the DVD set…etc.

George has been relentless in making sure you do NOT forget his baby.

All this started from one movie…thirty years ago. I was about two. (cough)

After the first three movies George just sat in his huge house and watched his kids grow, and filled up his library.

When he came out of retirement to make the final three films, some of us wished he hadn’t. So much in the movie world had progressed that the story seemed very old. The next three films, although still had great special effects, the scripts could have been written by your local postmaster, and that one character that drove everyone crazy…Jajabean, Jojaboin, Jajoboy...was enough alone to make you forget them.

Hey, I’m not looking up his name; I’m still trying to forget him. Go ahead, you look it up.

We can give George Lucas the admiration for the wonderful new technology in visual effects that he brought to the cinema, a man with a vision far ahead of his time---but I really don’t think the world needed to be swamped with 300 billions pieces of plastic Star Wars junk. George doesn’t want to pass up any generation of kids. He keeps on remaking the stuff after every anniversary.
The profits made in just the Star Wars toys alone probably built the new infrastructure of China’s own “Star Wars” program, complete with the latest nano-technology, putting them eons ahead of us in research.

Good thing we had our own "Yoda Master" Ronald Reagan to suggest we build our own.

Coming in April, we will we be getting a new Star Wars collection of stamps (which will be pretty cool) and along with that the Post Office has decided to spend our money on 400 new mailboxes, created to look just like R2-D2.

I would complain except I’d rather see taxpayers pay for 400 cool mailboxes than millions on security for our politicians to feel safe at their 2008 election conventions.

They are all millionaires; let them pay for their own. Besides…who are they afraid of? Us?

Maybe they are worried that the force is with us, not them.

So while we are going back to our childhood, and pretending to be Obi-Wan, other measures are being carefully planned.

The usual action with our government is that when one hand gives you a carrot, the other hand give you the stick, or should I say, knocks you out like a red light-saber.

On April 14th, the price of a stamp is going up to 41 cents, and since now we seem to have a socialist state, it’s important to keep up the appearance of the values that our country was founded on---sooooo…we are going to get a new stamp called the “Forever” stamp.

Yes, it’s a picture of the cracked Liberty Bell: a very fitting image of our cracked country may I add.

Marks Saunders a Post Office spokesman says: “This stamp will be good a hundred years from now. It will be used as a transition when the rates change.”

Right. I’ll pull out my 41 cent stamp a year from now to pay for my 59 cent stamp.

But, that’s not all. The ones of us that feel the “good” force (at least once a day) have got a feeling (remember, Obi Wan said “Trust your feelings Luke, let go!”)---some of us, when we heard today that thousands of regular mail boxes all over the country were going to be removed, had a feeling that Darth Vader and his dark Lord and master were lurking somewhere in our Capitol and disturbing the force: walking past the halls of Nancy, and hanging out in the hallways of Monica’s smoking lessons.

The thought then occurred to me--- it’s bad enough that I have to pay more for stamps, but…what if they take ALL the corner mailboxes away, and cut down on the mail service? Little by little. The mailman stops coming to pick up the mail on Saturday?

Then the government, due to the excuse that everyone is using e-mail, and they can’t make any money…what if they cut out mail delivery to three days a week?….then two….then one….then….
One day, in a galaxy very much like the Milky Way, the United States Post Office will announce that there will be no more mail delivery. All the mail will be delivered by e-mail. Just go to the U.S. Post Office online, buy your stamps with a credit card and they will personally mail your letter. You will even get special Star Wars letterhead stationary to pick from!

It will be so much fun!

What a clever way to get ALL e-mails taxed. Then, while you are being so happy picking out your favorite stationary with Luke Skywalker on the top, every e-mail you send will have to go through the US Postal service online. Microsoft will include a cute little icon on your desktop on the next Windows.

Like e-bay, we will all have little stamp accounts.

It will be just so cool, everyone will love it! That’s how they will sell the idea. They will make it so hard to pay your bills on time that you will have no choice.

In the last five years, I have personally been feeling like I have been battling whole armines of storm troopers, disguised as advertisements. With every single bill I open there is the “Pay your bills online!” suggestion just waiting for me to finally surrender to the idea.

After all...“It’s so easy! No Stamps!”

It’s been me battling the universe of what I consider to be “One more step to the state control of my bank account.”

Put all your money online, and don’t write that check. It’s so simple; just give us your bank account number.

Well---when I see this stuff I get out my blue saber and yell..."Not this nobody." I’d rather spend hours writing checks and putting stamps on envelopes, then pay my bills online.

It’s the principle of the thing.

Soon, all the money of the world will be, like the trillions of dollars passing online all over the world…just thin air. All money will be just numbers in cyberspace. The true Utopian cashless society is what Darth Vedar would want, because cash in the hands of regular people, just like guns, gives people the freedom to handle their own affairs.

You can’t hold on to a number on a screen in your hand. You might as aim a death-star at us.

So when the P.O someday says it's not making enough money, remember: The United States Post Office makes 73 billions a year, and handles one half of the world’s mail. And George Lucas's kids will still be making money off of Star Wars, way past the next millennium Falcon.

And this nobody, might as well go and buy the new stamps and put them in R2-D2.

After all, it would take more than the force of one to stop this new force of "fun."

Nobody’s Perfect: I must admit, I must have seen Star Wars, the first three movies, more times than I can count, and I still enjoy them.

Nobody Knows; When is George Lucas going to paint the Sears Towers to look like Darth Vedar? Maybe he could get together with our Congress and suggest some troop apparel changes. If he wanted to really help us out, he would develop lasers guns that detect Iraq mines.
Nobody Cares; May 14th is the last day you can mail your 39 cent stamps.

Princess Leia's most memorable moment was when she was a slave in a bikini, being held by a chain around her neck by Jubba the Hut. I'm sure the men would agree. George Lucas must have really enjoyed filming that scene, because not only did she look good, it was one of the greatest merchandising moments in the history of Star Wars!

If the world blows up from nuclear WWII, the aliens that visit the remains of this planet, will more than likely find millions of Star Wars toys, underneath the ashes. It will be a fitting legacy.

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Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Billary's Bargain Brings Billary Baloney


Nobody’s Opinion: Two for the price of one.

That was one of the slogans Bill Clinton used during his first Presidential Campaign, meaning, not only were you going to get the fabulous Bill Clinton boy wonder from Hope, Arkansas, if you elected him, you would also get his equal partner “wife” to serve by his side in power… Hillary Rodham.

What a Wal-Mart bargain.

I just got off of Hillary’s internet site. It wasn’t easy visiting the only internet site in the world were you might catch coodies, but somebody has to do it.

So, if you go on Hillary’s internet---do you see a picture of Hillary?

Nooooooooooooooooooooooo…nyet.

You see a big smacking video of Bill Clinton, telling you what a great president Hillary would make because of her persistence, passion, love of lesbianism--- I mean lebensraum, and of course, last but not in any way least…her record.

Yeah, I laughed too. Her record speaks volumes.

Then he asks you to donate, and they left all kinds of boxes to check---from ten dollars to 10 million. Don’t be shy.

Because it was reported today by the Harris Poll that half of the people in the country said they would NOT vote for Hillary, the battle plans have changed. Bill Clinton now has to run in her place…as the first lady with equal power.

Yes, once again they are letting you know that the American people will be getting two for one, merging finally, not only in spirit but physically, becoming the new…Billary. (See the above photo, soon to be released on campaign buttons.)

Everything that Billlary says will actually be one person saying it, the combination that ruled the first eight years, will rule the next fifty or so, because as Hillary has said today, Bill Clinton is the most popular person in the world, and when she becomes President, she “can make him ambassador to the world,” meaning, he will go into some kind of world ruling position.

He has wanted to rule at the U.N, but then wouldn’t let him in, so he just started his own UN in Hope, thanks to the generous donations of the good princes of Dubai.

Good thing Billary is not Jewish.

The planet earth will be renamed in their honor. Why beat around the bush? Besides, Bush beating has become the national pastime, and they feel quite comfortably telling you that they will rule all.

Lately, Billary has come out with some remarkable statements;

I think one of the hallmarks of our democracy is we have a devotion to the rule of law, which has historically included a degree of independence for U.S. attorneys to go after public corruption and pursue cases that are important to that constituency.” (As if Billary ever paid attention to the rule of law)

Well, Billary should know. When Billary fired all 93 attorneys when he/she first came into office, Jay Stevens, the US Attorney of D.C. at the time was investigating Dan Rostenkowski, who was the Chairman of the Ways and Means Committee.

For those of you not familiar with this committee, it’s the most important one in all of Congress, because this is where they decide just who gets all the taxpayer’s money! This was the man who was going to put all of Billary’s economic socialist/communist policies into production.

And even Billary will tell you, that kind of system takes big bucks.

Dan Rostenkowski later went to jail on mail fraud, only to be pardoned by Billary…

Also, this was a perfect time, for Billary to throw all the federal judges out, thereby eliminating almost all of the Whitewater allegations. A very friendly lady judge took over Arkansas and saw to it that the indictments went nowhere.

No wonder Billary was so confident.

Billary made the claim that this firing is commonly done when a President enters the office, which makes it non-political. Obviously, Billary has her/his own definition of politics…we just don’t recognize it because it’s more like a manifesto.

Billary also wanted you to know that not only did she/he do it in 1993, (fire all 93 federal judges) but so did Ronald Reagan, and Jimmy Carter!

Why, NOT firing 85 people when you came into office is unheard of!

Billary also promises to replace all federal judges appointed by President Bush, one she/he is President. This would in no way be political.

In 1993, Billary gave all 93 attorneys less then ten hours to clear out. Upon election in 2008, they would get less than a minute.

The fact that these eight federal judges/ attorneys were being fired by President Bush for NOT going after all the voter fraud committed in democratic states, you know the ones where those in democratic seats were elected by dead people, felons, illegal immigrants, and nine-year old children, to Billary--- is a crime of the utmost seriousness.

Voter fraud is not under Billary’s definition of public corruption.

Therefore, the Attorney General Gonzales needs to step down. Feeling very benevolent, they will give him eleven days.

Wait, Billary’s not President---yet. Somehow the operation of the merging body politic of Bill and Hillary has that old glitch that comes from one organism rejecting the organs of another.

It’s called….insanity.

Billary, will no doubt, sometime before 2008, be declaring she/he needs another operation, but I don’t think it’s going to help.

In the meantime, Bill Clinton needs to have his nails done.

Nobody’s Perfect: I hate to say it, but I do think Bill looks better as a woman. I’m not so sure Hillary would make a better looking man. I'm also not sure what that means.

Nobody’ Knows; Hillary has been going around saying that Ronald Reagan did the same thing Bill Clinton did when he first came into office, as did Jimmy Carter. (fired all federal judges)

And yet, I have read in more places than one that this is a bold face lie. Both Reagan and Carter replaced the federal judges when their tenures expired. When you’re a woman trying to run on your husband’s popularity, what’s a few “misprints.”

Nobody Cares; Billary also said on the subject of “parent notification.”

There are times in which the family is so dysfunctional that notification is not appropriate.”

So, one wonders, just what are the criteria in which the Billary Bargain House is going to judge whether you are a dysfunctional parent, and therefore will not be notified when Billary takes your child out of your house and puts them in the new Billary School for dysfunctional kids?

That wasn’t on her website.

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Monday, March 26, 2007

Florida: Justice Casino Style

Nobody’s Opinion: Today the great detective work of the Florida Seminole Police Casino Department had declared that the body of the blond bombshell Anna Nicole Smith, was found to be---well dead. They didn’t think anything was suspicious at all about the fact that three people were in the room with her for days, including a nurse, and she just happened to die.

It certainly wasn’t their fault she was so stupid!

Her lawyer, Howard K. Stern, even though he loved her with all of his heart and soul, knew she had a 105 fever, but just had to go out shopping for his new yacht anyway. After all….taking care of Anna’s estate was much more important.

The Floridian coroner also ruled there was no foul play in the many drugs found in her system. Why---according to him, even though she was depressed and taking anti-depressants, she certainly would never have killed herself.

Joshua A. Perper, MD, the highly esteemed man with the Russian accent who had been endorsed as simply brilliant by the leading forensic pathologist of Fox news, had declared that most suicide victims take an overdose of many pills, not the proper amount of many, as she had done…therefore, he deemed it was just an accident.

I mean, no suicide victim would think of just grabbing all she had and shoving it down, don't be silly.

No wonder the Russians lost the cold war.

In order to prove his theory he released what was found in her body to prove his point that her death was “accidental.”

He was sure to list all the drugs as “therapeutic.”

These wonderful therapeutic pills found in Anna were:

1. Diphenhydrammine which causes hallucinations, confusion, drowsiness, slurring speech and amnesia.
2. Clonazepam, which causes drowsiness, slurring speech, and amnesia.
3. Diazepam, (Valium) which causes drowsiness, slurring speech, and confusion, special warning not to take with any other medicines that cause drowsiness.
4. Nordiazepam, which is known to impair your driving…but in Anna’s case, walking.
5. Temazepam, which causes drowsiness, slurred speech, and by now, she is in a coma.

And did you get the feeling as I did, that someone didn’t want her to remember anything?

Here Anna, "These will help you forget your son...take these, take some more."

Well, nothing suspicious there.

Then he listed “other non-contributory drugs” present;

1. Atropine, actually is belladonna, a potentially deadly drug that my cause difficulty swallowing. It really CAN kill you, but of course the good doctor says that she did not take a whole bottle of this stuff.
2. Topiramate causes grogginess, cognitive deficiency, and memory problems.
3. Cipro, well, what do you know, finally an antibiotic! Unfortunately it couldn’t get through her otherwise clogged up veins. It probably didn’t get through until her funeral, but by then she was already dead.

And let’s not forget the Chloral Hydrate that her nurse/psychiatrist sidekick gave her. Kristina Eroshevich, another clueless Russian, got as much for her as she wanted. In fact, she had so much of this stuff in her liver that even her hair was sleepy.

When Kristina found Anna she also called her boyfriend before Howard, the hotel, or an ambulance. Something all nurses are taught to do.

It took a while for the boyfriend to get there.

Not only is Chloral Hydrate highly addictive, it’s another “sleep aid.” that no one should have given her at all. When asked why they let her take all these combinations it was replied, “Anna called the shots for Anna.”

What could they do? God forbid she didn’t feed them.

Oh, there was that shot from an infected needle, that caused her to get really, really sick. But, she’s so stupid, she probably gave that to herself by accident. She slipped and fell on it.

The doctor also noted that the laptops taken from Howard the Stern showed no signs of suicide, and she was reported to have been very cheerful at the hotel.

I’m sure she had her clown mask on. That Anna was such a card! Always spinning around!

In the end, Howard K. Stern was relieved to have that pressure off him. After all, he took a video to prove to the whole world just how stoned she was, how her speech was slurred, and how he was going to sell that tape for a lot of money.

In the end, there is good news and bad news;

The good news is; if you have someone you would like to kill off by just getting them hooked on drugs so badly that they aren’t even aware they are being killed, rent a room in South Florida. After all, the whole justice system was set up by the same lady who defended the kids at Waco, Janet Reno: they can’t even count chads down there, let alone declare that one hundred pills in a body were not accidentally swallowed.

The bad news is; I’m sure this stuff happens everyday. The victims just don’t look like Anna Nicole.

I know one thing, the next time that I go to South Florida, I’m not betting against the house.

Nobody’s Perfect: The guy with the lopsided cranium, Joshua A. Perper, after saying that she did not commit suicide, put in the autopsy report that she suffered a depression after death of son, seeing no contradiction at all in that statement.

Nobody Knows; Just last week a report came out with the headline “Monroe Was Tricked Into Suicide.” It was reported on the FBI site of our government, that Robert Kennedy, with the help of Monroe’s housekeeper who put the bottle of Chloral Hydrate by her bedside, helped kill Monroe with a plan was made up to deliberately give the news to fake another suicide attack.

In other words, Marilyn was duped.

There was a phone conversation where Robert Kennedy called Peter Lawford and said, “Is she dead yet?” Peter had to keep calling Marilyn to make sure.

Probably the very same words spoken by Howard Stern from his yaght.

Nobody Cares; Anna would have been extremely happy to know that she was tricked into suicide too, just like her idol. If she really wanted to die like Monroe, then she hit the jackpot.

But…if I were Howard Stern, I would watch out for storms at sea. You never know what’s in the roll of the universal dice.

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Sunday, March 25, 2007

Laura Bush, Come Back.

Nobody's Flashing: Today, this picture was released of our President being seen with a strange woman who is standing in for the first lady, Laura Bush.

You can tell from the look on his face that he is wondering if anyone suspects the switch.

Laura was reported last seen in Las Vegas, playing the tables at The Mirage. She once told Jay Leno "What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas." Proving that she knew the city well.

Being as this is not good for the President, it was decided to give Laura a break and find a look-a-like.

The young guard at her side, is bound and determined to keep the secret, but he really misses Laura, who used to let him come into the White House kitchen and eat chocolate-chip cookies.

As you can see, this woman is at least 40 pounds thinner than the real lady. Her nose is just a little bigger. Also, notice how very friendly her hand wave is, not at all like the real lady who always waves in a very low...hip wave. This woman is an impostor.

So, where is the first lady? If you are reading the tabloids, Laura Bush has been mad at the President for months. He accordingly had an affair with Condi, ignored her as she was going through cancer treatments, and rumors has it, he has been drinking again.

They even had a big fight and he went to Camp David all by himself! There might be a divorce.

Once again, the taxpayers money is not only going to be spent on spinach, Nancy's big Plane, Bill Clinton's body guards, and Ted Kennedy's lunches (enough money alone to build a wall on the whole border) we are paying for a stand in for the first lady.

Frankly, I think Laura deserves a break. Probably, like the rest of us, she is tired of her husband not standing up for himself. And she probably knows what's REALLY going on with all this Iraq stuff.

She also is afraid that she will take the stand and say what she REALLY thinks of most of the people who do nothing but use "let's attack the President" as a way to not get a thing done, and to set themselves up for power.

So Laura, hurry back soon. Lot's of people will be fooled by this lady, whoever she is, but Barney is not going to like her. And Barney is the most trusted soul right now in the White House.

Nobody Knows: Yes, I made this all up...Laura is really a Democratic spy for Hillary Clinton.

That's how come our President keeps making political "mistakes." She is advising him, on advise from Hillary. She is also drugging him on Sundays, and at press conferences.

Nobody Cares; Okay, I made THAT up. We all he would listen to her advice. My advice is that they would do well to let Laura make some appearances, even if it's to tell us she loves to cook, and only goes to Vegas with her daugters. This "Liddy hunt" is getting old.

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