Saturday, April 24, 2010

Saturday Night Email...Lay-off Jose

Nobody Gets EMail: Lay-off Jose.

This is my favorite email of the week...and what a week it's been! Well, now that they have a "problem" with the border, ol' Obama will just have to come and legalize all immigrants...he just loves that choas.

But, until that happens, I figure we have at least a few more weeks of scenes like this.

Thanks to my old friend Patty! Wait, she's not that old...really, she a few months older than me, which means we are BOTH younger than Susan Sarandon...

The Okla financial crisis is forcing agencies like ODOT to make tough decisions. If things continue for much longer, there's a real risk that we may have to lay off Jose.


Thursday, April 22, 2010

Nobody Wins: Censoring South Park?

Nobody Wins:
Come on.
You've GOT to be kidding me.
South Park is being censored because the creators, Trey Parker and Matt Stone, made fun of Muhammad? AND--- just how many idiots did I see on my cable tonight saying...we should RESPECT the Prophet? And it's right they be censored?
Say that again there comrades?
What's going on here? Are we REALLY so scared of the Muslims that we will curtail our speech? Run like rabbits? Ooooooo, I'm so sorry Mr. Muslim.
That's what's happened when you elect a President named Obama. I'm just saying.
I'm not a big watcher of the South Park program, I used to be, but they got a little too silly for my taste and I just would rather watch a movie, but that's me.
It's not because I don't think they have talent...they certainly do. But really, these guys have made so much fun of Jesus and all religions...that they hold the record for practically resurrecting Jesus all on their own. And like they said, how hypocritical would they be to make fun of Catholics and not of Muslims?
This is not good. The government is really taking over and going gangbusters on this agenda they have. We have Tom Hanks and now James Cameron running around being idiots. And just tonight...on the (Conservative? Be careful there.) FOX channel, we had Sweets, the psychiatrist from BONES telling us to all go ride our bikes in a special public service message, and then another character from Fringe...(two of my favorite TV sitcoms) saying some other goggle-gook thing about the "green" planet junk propaganda...and now, we are not supposed to even joke about a Muslim God who has no tolerance ? A God who has so little tolerance that he demands anyone who mocks him, should be killed?
What are we in...the stone age? Do we really WANT these people in our country? It doesn't matter, 'they' are bringing them in as fast as they can, and look what it did to France.
The global elite want us all to mix and all get The global community just has to start being nice to each other...because they say so. What's going to happen? Are they going to have to close down all the Burger Kings in Baghdad if we don't mix and match?
The new Global currency will not go forward?
Well, let the Muslims turn off the program, if they feel bad. I don't like looking at soft porn on every other channel, so I can turn it off, and I do. Let them go home. This is STILL America.
I say, bravo to Trey Parker and Matt Stone the creators of South Park for sticking up for their right to have free speech. Good for them. I'm not afraid for these two guys. This is what made America with no fear.
Our country, on the other hand, is in serious trouble when our leaders are so intimidated so easily by "threats, which if you haven't noticed, is all we hear out of Iran these days, that they simply fold up our free speech rights---in the name of...being afraid.
Obama says...nothing. Have you noticed? Today he was giving a speech on Wall Street, except he lied...he was at a Union Rally...NEAR Wall Street. Our President has become such a God, and lies so much, he should be a regular on South Park. I'd watch it again.
Has he been made fun of on South Park? I mean, is Sarah Palin the only one our satirists are allowed to make fun of?
Good god. This is really...beyond belief. And it's only just begun.
Bring on the pork, and bring on the dogs. If we don't all stand up for our own rights, then we deserve to be taken over.
It's summer, and I'm putting on my shorts...I hope they see me.
On the other hand, this might just be a ploy to get ratings. In any case, it makes a good point.


Helping Out on Earthday

Nobody Flashes: It's Earth Day...this is serious. In fact, as we see from this picture, our pets will soon find it hard to find a good tree.

And I truly love trees. All my trees. In fact, I let them grow as big as they want, and when they get old with holes in them, or take over the sidewalk, I will not even touch them...or trim them, I just let them be their fun self! Besides, if a tornado knocks them over, I can really collect much more on my insurance.

But, without more trees, the dogs will suffer. order to help out the dogs, who are suffering from all this human expansion, I'm going to put up flyer's with Al Gore's picture on it on all the trunks of all my order for the dogs to know what to do, and not even have to think about it.

We must keep the trees that are left on our planet...happy.


Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Nobody Cares About the Rich

Nobody Cares---but me when it comes to criticizing the rich and what they spend their money one of my favorite vices.
For instance, in the first picture, we see a movie room and sound system, that is definitely worth whatever zillions the man paid for it.
In the next picture, we see, bottles of slightly more than ordinary alcohol that tastes just as good as any bottle of cheap champagne...But these babies go for $75,000 a bottle. No doubt the state department has already a few on board Air Force One, (Obama)Two, (Hillary)Three, (Pelosi)and Four.(one extra just for the Saudi Kings)
If I had to choose, put me in the first picture with a Coke and buttered popcorn, and I would probably do a Hitler and watch TV every single night. (Did you know he did that?)
Then, on Saturday night, I'd take the Don to an old drive-in, somewhere near an old train station. (Just one bottle would be plenty) I would need to bring along a pot of tea, to get my husband to come along, and it would have to be a Stephen King/Rambo movie, double feature.
Nobody cares as much as I do, about keeping track of what the rich spend. I promise to do a better nobody job on the future, it's a hard job, but somebody has to do it.


Nobody Knows Where the Bunkers Are...

Nobody Knows: Did you know that our government has over40 underground bunkers throughout the United States, along with a shadow government already in place for our rich politicians if we are attacked?
And do you also know, that this is the New Cook County Correctional Center in Chicago, IL, built by "Obama" who got the funds for it--- And did you know it's here he plans to put the GITMO prisoners?
Now...seeing how really fancy our prisons are starting to look, can you even imagine how wonderfully equipped the underground bunkers for all our "rulers" are?
I bet you can count on swimming pools, sauna's, hot tubs, and probably even a golf course or two. I wonder if all the movie stars will have a private bunker waiting for you think they would leave Angelina Jolie above ground?
And what do the citizens have? No worry, they are getting the men ready for the nuclear winter with video games like FALLOUT THREE, where you can walk around the remnants of very gloomy and dark destroyed cities, like Washington D.C. and practice shooting people and goons in the destroyed subways of New York. They are getting us all prepared.
But, that prison is something, isn't it? If I was homeless...I'd be tempted to commit a crime just to get three great meals a day...and do nothing but play basketball, watch TV, and work out...maybe get a degree...
Nobody Knows where these nuclear fallout bunkers are (The 40 number is from the Washington Post) or what they look like, but I think it's a good thing...otherwise, their worries about an armed revolution would probably happen sooner than later.
But...what do I know? I do know one thing....none of us will ever see the inside of one.
Hey it's EARTH DAY! I had to think about something!


Monday, April 19, 2010

Nobody's Perfect: Kiefer Sutherland

Nobody's Perfect: I guess it's hard to be a child of famous people, who get divorced when you're just a kid, and you're father drops out of you life, and you go from school to school, and then you are raised in every other town, and you really want to be a rock star, but you get into movies, cause you can get work there, and then you happen to love to drink, and love to look at strippers....and more often than not...get just a little bit too drunk.
It seems just last week, Kiefer Sutherland was put in jail for being drunk. And then just a few days ago...he was thrown out of a stripper bar, because he took off his clothes and by all accounts was "absolutely screamingly paralytic."
Keifer, as we see here, loves to take off his clothes. I'd say, there is a REAL need for attention here, you don't have to be a doctor to know that.
Maybe he should just buy his own club...then he could go as crazy as he likes. (And don't ask me why more men who adore strippers don't do this...I have NO idea.)
We are all going to miss the character of Jack Bauer, and he will be with us no longer it seems, having only 3 more days to go on his much beloved 24.
Despite his personal problems, Kiefer Sutherland, has done something many children of famous people sometimes don't succeed in doing. He IS actually more likable than his dad, Donald, and as a producer, more successful. He has worked very, very hard. 24 was by all accounts, one of the most exciting shows ever to hit our hearts and minds...and refreshing in this all too politically correct age, where the right thing is almost NEVER done...but Jack did them. America could get a much needed hero hookup every week...Jack was there.
Thanks Kiefer.
But in his personal life, I'd say that Kiefer is having a hard time finding the right woman. I think he should look for a stripper who plays keyboards or bass. It would help if she liked cows.
Anyway, I can't get too mad at the guy---like millions of alcoholics, it's not easy to get over the depression deep inside that is causing his pain, pain that must be so intent that while it makes him a great actor, it also makes him to want to get completely plastered, and take off his front of..other people.
Playing in bars myself for so many years...I've seen guys do it, (take off their clothes and dance) and I always wondered if they were trying to impress me (I was the singer/musician) or trying to impress the other men. They mostly did it on nights when the bar was full of men.
Somebody explain this to me, I'm still trying to understand it.
Anyway, Kiefer...had another bad week, but word had it, he didn't drive his car, so that's an improvement.
Someday Jack, you'll figure it all out. Until then...realized, it's okay to not be Jack Bauer. NOBODY could be that perfect; I'm sure the guitar- playing Kiefer Sutherland is just...fine.


Sunday, April 18, 2010

Hammerheading Myself

Nobody's Opinion: It's one of those lonely nights. I have lots of "subjects" running through my head, but, I'm tired of the whole mess. It happens when you get older. The LAST thing I want to talk about is Obama, and Clinton and Nancy and their big party on Miami Beach, and how Clinton is going around all the universities getting the kids to pledge to "serve" his Clinton cause. His...globalization of a world of engineered zombies.

Sometimes you just have to get off that wheel and notice the rest of life...for instance this shark. Is God strange or what? How does evolution explain these poor creatures heads? How does it SEE what it's eating? Did whales use their noses as seat cushions for two million years?

Anyway, this shark reminds me of my childhood, because when I was around five and six, I spent many a weekend watching the men fish for hammerheads off the end of the Naples Pier, in Naples, FL. They would throw great chunks of raw meat in the water...and they even put a few old cars down that the sharks would feel right at home.

When you're five, and you look at one of these things...flapping around your feet for its last breath of life, you wonder why god would do such a thing to a creature? But then again, look what he did to jellyfish. Hammerheads are very scary when you're five, flapping around on the pier...everyone trying not to get near them.

Yes, I'm feeling lonely. I miss my home town.

I just got off the phone with my son. He's had just gotten back from a vacation in Naples, (FL), the town that I grew up in. He spent half the time in his hotel room due to some really killer deathly flu. It was good to hear that he was okay, because he had called me a few nights ago from the emergency room, somewhere off of Marco island. They had managed to get some fluids down him and THANK GOD he had the sense to go. Like millions of self-employed young people, who work for companies that don't offer insurance, sometimes they wait till they are on their deathbed before they get help...due to the expense.

He is worried about the huge bill he will be getting. We all know, Obama is not going to be there to "help" him out.

I'm just glad, he's alive. If you have children then you know how it is when your child (even if that child is an adult) calls you from some emergency room and they are thousands of miles away. Hell...I feel like I just escaped a shark. Life is just too precarious to know what I mean?

Anyway, just the thought of the town, brought back so many memories. It happens when you are older...have you noticed? The older you are, you can remember your childhood like it was yesterday, but what you did last week is sometime almost always a mystery.

I really remember, the hammerhead sharks off the great Naples Pier. I included this picture of one caught in Australia...the ones in Naples were just medium size.

I also remember the day while my dad was fishing off the pier, and I was bored, and he gave me a pocket knife, and a bucket, and told me to go on and cut out the eyeballs of all the fish on the beach I did. It was red tide, and I collected about four hundred eyeballs. I was five.

All I can say is my father believed in letting kids have fun. He probably laughed at me the whole time, because I was really proud of my obvious future as a great surgeon. I thought operating on human brains would be great fun! I would grow up to be a very famous doctor, and operate on human brains. Yes! Right dad?

My dad...agreed. (Of course he agreed! As long as I rode in the back of the station wagon.)

There was another time, that my father's best friend...a crazy Englishmen named Clarence...took a bet that he would jump off the end of the pier and swim to shore, (it's a good mile swim into the shore) and so he did...and good thing he did not hear the crowd on the pier yelling...


And sure enough, we watched a nice big fin....follow Clarence, who was swimming at a nice lazy pace...all the way back to shore. Clarence never saw him, and God is good.

There was not one person on that pier who could even believe that the shark, never took even one little bite out of Clarence. As a kid, I figured that Clarence was just too jolly of a guy, and God wanted to keep him around. After that, sharks didn't scare me anymore...until JAWS.

And that's a whole other blog.

The last time my son was in Naples,--- he was only one year old. We got into the hotel really late (my first husband, me, and my son) and even though we were dead tired, I took him to down to the ocean. It was dark, and he really couldn't see much. He doesn't remember it...but I do. It overwhelmed him. I remember his face as he peered out into the darkness. It was priceless. It's etched forever in my mommy's priceless moments brain memory banks.

"Did you get to see the pier? Do you remember being there when you were one?" I asked tonight?

"No...but I bought you a tee-shirt mom, with Naples on it."

My heart soared.

So, why am I lonely? My son is alive...and he just witnessed, as an adult, what I have been telling him about...the beauty of the ocean, the ambiance of a town, still with its small-town character intact.

But tonight, I feel a shark on my heels. Life sometimes attacks you like a shark, and like the ocean, and the universe, and the mystery of why hammerheads are just so darn funny looking...later in life you know you can't do all you want to do...and it's an empty feeling.

And I know what's wrong. I'm actually afraid that I will never get to walk on that pier with my son before I share with him the warm feel of the salt air, the stars, and the twinkle of the lights on the water. I'm more afraid of not experiencing that in my lifetime than any hammerhead shark.

So...I'm not going to give up on THAT dream...I will put it in my twinkle jar, along with the eyeballs, and hammerheads.

Now, don't you wonder, as I do...if that guy pulled in that shark all by himself?

And could his maybe...Clarence?