Friday, April 25, 2008

One Global Airline---At Your Service!

Nobody Flashes Anymore: Ever since 9/11, the airline industry has really taken a dive. (Sorry, couldn't help myself) All our great American airlines have lost so much money, that if you even dare ASK for a bag of peanuts, you will quickly be thrown of the plane.

Yes, after 9/11, thousands of stewardesses lost their jobs. Some who had been flying since WWII, suddenly found themselves having to do normal things---like getting the oil changes on their cars, taking the kids to school, sadly sitting at home and watching their ovens clean...hoping someday, to be called back to the glamorous job of trying to get the couple in the back row to hide under a bigger blanket, and not moan.

Times got so bad that the airlines had to cut out serving meals, pillows, playing cards, and that nice bed in the back where the co-pilot used to go with...

Wait, that's a movie.

But nothing had damaged the airline industry more than the rising cost of gas. order to survive, Northwest Airlines merged with Delta. That turned out to be such a success that Continental, U.S. Airways, and American are talking about merging.

This talk came on the same weekend that British Prime Minister Gordon Brown gave his talk at Harvard, where he said that the United States must accept "new global rules" "new global institutions" and "global networks" and "new global airlines."

Wait---he didn't say "new global airlines" but that seems to be the end goal airline to serve all the "globe" run by one "global government."

So, what are they going to do with all those planes that just can't pass the "new" global plane emissions test?

As we see from the picture, one can only guess.



Thursday, April 24, 2008

Chinese Rice Hoarders!

Nobody’s Opinion; The sub-topic today, besides Hillary and Obama whining about each other, was: Food. The alarm in the air is that Cosco and Wal-Mart are running out of that great American staple—rice. The reporter was so upset, and so bewildered reporting this news that he wore a yellow plaid tie on top of a light blue shirt, with a dark pin-strip suit. It was a horrible scene to watch.

I don’t think they are feeding those poor reporters.

The camera paned to the empty stalls in Cosco where there were only a few bags of rice remaining. It was a lonely scene right out of The Grapes of Wrath.

Oh boy, this could be bad.

But here in middle America, where Wal-Mart’s have come in with humongous bulldozers and basically decimated every shop and family business in its way and plunked down amid sometimes hundreds of screams---like Darth Vader deciding to make a space port--you don’t see too many housewives working up a big sweat about it, because the only people that are going to maybe be affected by this are Mexican and Chinese Restaurants.

We still have hamburgers---as in McDonalds, Burger King, Wendy’s, White Castle, and Jack in the Box, which as everyone knows, we live off of. We’ll survive, right?

We might all die of Mad Cow disease, but we will not die hungry.

I don’t get it. They report food shortages here, but in the next sentence they say that American Restaurants all over the country are really suffering for customers due to the economy. So, how could they be running out of rice when nobody is going out to eat?

Are people buying rice bags to line their fall-out shelters?

Come to think of it, last night at Taco Bell they told me they had ran out of onions…my Super Burrito would not have onions on it. I thought it would be uneatable, but for the life of me, I swear…there was no difference, which made me wonder---just how many onions were they putting in them before? Three little slivers the size of a baby’s fingernails? (Sorry, it’s a mother thing.)

And don’t you just hate it when you see one of those sub-way sandwiches advertized, and you order one, like say, a Chicken Teriyaki Sandwich, which you expect to have chicken on it, then, when you get your table, sit down, all hungry, and there is a big wad of bread, before you, with about five pounds of lettuce inside and all kind of strange looking little red things (that look like bloody bugger bugs) in it, but only three pieces of chicken?

Where’s the chicken? Who knows where the chicken went?

No wonder that guy lost weight.

Yes, our food costs are soaring and you know what they say is the cause? Well, besides ethanol.

China. China is at fault. Yep.

China’s millions have come into the middle classes thanks to our big American companies setting up their factories and giving them jobs. And instead of having to eat bugs, and leftover dog, they now can get first class rice dishes, no doubt with lots of onions.

So in order to make all those Chinese people fat and happy, which is what we need to do if we want them to have the energy to work day after day in American sweatshops so we can have cheap stuff to stick in our houses, we grow food and ship it over to them.

They in return send us tainted dog food---thanks.

No one ever mentions that China is a pretty big country and has been growing rice for centuries. Now, I guess they don’t want to share their rice with us anymore.
They’re too busy eating steak, and driving their new America Ford cars to their wonderful middle class restaurants to bother to grow rice for little ol’ America.

Either that or they too are buying rice bags for their fall-out shelters.

And now the United States is not sending over free food to feed the rest of the world, because our Congress said we have to put our food into our gas tanks.

Okay, I don’t get it again. Since when do we send off our food supplies to feed other countries before we feed ourselves? Was this on the news and I somehow missed it?
And why do WE always have to feed the world? Why doesn’t China and India step in and feed them?

Why don’t they all feed themselves?

Because then, American companies would not get the profits.

There’s a whole book written about this very subject, how the World Bank set this global free “food” network up in order to make millions of people in third world countries depended on free food from America…keeping them poor and starving, and big American companies very rich…

But I can’t remember the name of it, because now, I’m hungry. I plan on hoarding all my rice from now on, so when the day finally comes when there is no more rice…

I can call up my Chinese friend and offer him some fortune cookies.


Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Moe, Moooney, and Curly Cain

Nobody Flashes: By now, we have all pretty much figured out that the two-year-long Presidential contest between three stooges who by any other names are pretty much the same candidate in disguise, is being put on and staged for us all to sit back and enjoy while the networks get huge ratings promoting the endless..."Who will win in Paducah, Kentucky? Who's will win in Toledo, Ohio? Who will say what to whom and cause a race riot?

Who actually bowls better?

And most importantly---What will Bill Clinton say when he finds out that the new Air Force One is being built by Al Gore's instructions, and will run on solar panels?

Can we even print it?

Who would have ever dreamed that they would live to see the day in American history when one of the candidates running for President would be named after a sworn hated enemy, and that man would not even, in honor of the country he wants to serve and the men who have given their lives in Iraq...offer to change it to prove to the American citizens just how disgusting he thinks his namesake is? Nope. Not Barack. Don't even call him Barry. It's Barack. It's Obama, It's insane Hussein.

Just think back in World War II, if a candidate running for President back then just happened to have the name of Adolf Hitler? And THEN expected everyone to vote for him, because...well, his mother admired the with it.

I shiver to even think about what that generation would have said.

I suggest we just call him Moe from now on.

And who would have thought that in this day and age, a woman who's husband helped sell all our nuclear secrets to China, (Yes, you can do anything in the wonderful Commerce Department.) --Who would have thought that his wife would be even allowed to run to take his place, and THEN...only to be backed by her sworn enemies---Rush Limbaugh and Ann Coulter---two stout patriots who continue to help her win by getting all their fans to go out and vote for her?

Let's not call her Larry...that's an insult to his memory. Let's just call her...Moooney.

(Or Mommy Dearest) (

And then, last but certainly the least, as is intended---Who would have thought that a man who by all other accounts is a true Democrat, but saying he is a Republican--- someone it seems obvious has been groomed long ago to run as the fall guy in this election...just so we could have our first woman President---Who would have thought that the only options Republicans will have when voting is for a man who is so old, he might not even make it to the elections, or to not vote at all.

We will never know if we are seeing the actual John McCain or just old clips being made at this very moment for future use in some secret underground bunker...

A man so liberal, that if Ted Kennedy asked him to take a drive across a bridge at night, in the dark...while having a drink...he would probably get in the car...

Let's just call him Curly Cain.

Moe, Mooooney, and Curly Cain.

Bannna Pana, Bo, Burlie, Fi, Fie, Fo Murlie...Curly.

Yeah, that about sums it up.

Whoever wins this contest of insanity in American History--- it sure ain't gonna be us.

Pass the clicker.


Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Aliza's Bloody Art Project

Nobody’s Opinion: If you are an art student who has trouble drawing a picture---have no fear. In this day and age of shock your way into the noble profession of artistic expression---you can: plaster a picture of the Virgin Mary with manure: hang a mock cross of Jesus upside down in a subway: or create a pictorial reproduction of Davinci’s Last Supper with the cast of TV actors as Apostles, replacing Jesus with a sexy woman in a red dress to promote your new sitcom series. Do this, and people will come running to your exhibition.

There is no limit to expressing oneself it seems… all in the name of “art.”

Recently an art student from Yale University, Aliza Shavarts, got her Andy Warhol’s fifteen minutes of fame by saying that she kept impregnating herself and then aborting her fetuses in order to “further the conversation between art and the human body.”

It was her special “art” project; complete with her many fetuses’ blood, which has inspired many other budding artists to make fetus “blood” jewelry. (shown here)

Well…what do you expect in the age of Madonna?

Yale university spokespersons, while proud of a “woman’s right to choose,” denied that she did such a ridiculous thing…Aliza begs to differ.

Wait--they didn’t say it was ridiculous. They didn’t condemn it either. They just said she made it all up. It’s their word against hers.

Aliza looked very happy in her recent pictures, and why shouldn’t she be? The Huffington Post has probably given her enough attention that she will be assured tenure at Yale for the rest of her life should she decide to become an art teacher and carry on the noble tradition of the liberal agenda, which is: that there are just too many people in the world, and women should have the right to raise children alone with the loving help of the state, or abort them.

The liberal agenda is doing just fine. Now there are more single families in the United States then traditional families, and most of them are poor.

It was the liberals, in the 1960’s, who turned the sad fiasco of single woman struggling to raise one child without a dad (and in the case of welfare--- many) into a glorious, magnificent “right”---lovingly granted by the Supreme Court.

And while women were being “sexually” liberated and told of the glorious rewards waiting for them in the work force, David Rockefeller was gleefully patting himself on the back for that great idea “they” had for cheap labor.

Getting women back in the work force, meant getting women out of the house, and that meant Planned Parenthood was set up in every city for that unplanned moment of sexually liberated passion.

Pass the “No-fault” divorce laws on top of it, and buckets of tears were shed by women who sometimes made terrible and heart-scarring decisions of ending a precious life, that in any other circumstances they would have wanted, when they found out that the sexually liberated man they were in love with did not want marriage or children.

The subject of abortion is the red headed step-child nobody wants to talk about. Woe Vs Wade said that a life didn’t begin until it was born…while the scientific fact, not talked about in any newspaper for decades, is that life begins at conception.

Two miracle cells come together, multiply, and viola! God is looking at you kid!

But, the liberals told everyone it was the woman’s body and her right to do whatever she wanted with it, including aborting the child. They gave the man no legal say, even though he was half responsible---another gross injustice.

Because of this, millions of babies who would have otherwise been born here in the United States were aborted, leaving the baby boomers latching emotionally now onto their dogs, instead of beloved grandchildren.

Veterinarians are buying homes in Cancun.

Politicians, who now demand the merging of Mexico with the United States, now argue it’s necessary because the baby boomers did not supply the necessary children to support themselves in their old age.

And while the liberals scream at the murders of the people of Tibet, they hypocritically say absolutely nothing of the millions of unborn baby girls in China. The Chinese military now outnumbers any on earth, and it’s a human-time bomb ticking with an excess of testosterone.

What are we going to do if China attacks? Fight them with Mexican gardeners?

And why Hillary Clinton does not mention her years of hard work with the United Nations, making sure abortions are giving freely to the entire world, courtesy of the United States, is beyond me. Bill and Melinda Gates and most of the elites also are on this crusade…it’s their way of saving the planet. Kill the unborn, before they take up too much room. After all, they’ll only starve if they are born.

No, the real artists here are the politicians who keep spinning their own continuous resurrections.

Stalin would be proud.

So, if Aliza can kill all those fetuses, as calmly as Jeffery Dalmer having lunch at the mall, with no remorse…there is no reason why another art student couldn’t use Aliza for their art project…kill her with “herbs” and put her body on display for “discussion.”

I suggest the Yale faculty lunch room ceiling…they could call it Aliza’s Sistine Chapel of great art, where the human body meets the liberal gulag mind.

Somebody pass me the Alka-Seltzer.

(By the way, these last three paragraphs are a “fictional” artistic comment, not meant to be taken literally.)

And by the way..."Thou shalt not Kill" was one of the ten commandments.

Next time you see a “liberal” in church…you might want to think about that.


Monday, April 21, 2008

Five Years--Iraq and the Seminole

Nobody Flashes Anymore:
Consider this Quote--"Sixteen millions of Anglo-Saxons unable to subdue, in five years, by force and by fraud, by secret treachery and by open war, sixteen hundred savage warriors!"
This was a quote by John Quincy Adams, around 1838, in a series of speeches he gave in the House. JQA was not only the only soul fighting slavery in the House, but was appalled on how the slave owning Southerners were treating the Indians. Basically, they wanted their lands because they were depleting their own "cotton" farms, and wanted the southern lands....the Seminoles put up a great fight.
And John Quincy fought every day for the horror to stop...of course he was in the minority.
Adams believed this war, with Jackson in the White House, "was being managed with "imbecility."
JQA opposed a host of bills to escalate the war by sending additional regular troops and expanding the militia.
Funny isn't it? John Quincy thought it ridiculous that after five years they could not defeat the Indians. And then...Jackson wanted MORE money?
Sound familiar?
I got this out of Mr. Adams's Last Crusade, by Joseph Wheelan, an excellent book, about the timeless fighter.
Oh, yeah---the Seminoles finally lost, but they were surrounded by water, and there was only so many of them. The middle East, on the other hand, has enough men to fight, as McCain would say, another hundred years....
I wonder what John Quincy would say today? I wonder....


Sunday, April 20, 2008

Nobody Reports on a Monday: Let's All Just Leave..

Nobody’s Opinion: I thought I could make it through the weekend without going crazy---I was wrong.

When Fox News late Sunday afternoon was showing a big picture of a jet plane called “Sheppard One” (that’s the name for the Pope’s jet plane, that was kept onscreen for way too long) as it was getting ready to leave the United States, it was time to call the United States, and every one in it completely out of their minds.

Yes, we’ve lost it. We’re branding the Pope…whose stole the theme of “Hope” from Obama, with the help of Beethoven, Yankee Stadium, and as many bishops as existed in on the end of a pin, to help him out. The obsequious gawking of the Pope was so overbearing that each reporter could not say enough wonderful things. I don’t care; even Jesus would have certainly puked. The whole thing was beyond crash. Nevertheless, many a religious person, even those I thought had actually read our Constitution, did not dare speak a word against this insidious use of the Pope to further political agendas.

They let their good senses go out the door, and kept silent.

We had non-stop coverage on all major channels of the Pope, riding around in his little white bullet-proof cab. Come-on…one God is enough. The Pope insults the United States, then gives a speech at the UN and tells us all we should go back to the wonderful original goals set by those globalists---Wilson and FDR, which as the great Henry Lamb reminds us, is a one world government under the UN. He says this because soon a new Constitution for the North American Union will be signed by Canada, Mexico, and George W. Bush, in New Orleans.

Yes, George W. Bush will once again continue to sell America off to history. Many of us were thinking…is this his way of telling us WWIII is coming soon?

Is there a better way to get rid of all us nasty gas-guzzlers?

Naturally the timing was prefect for Hillary, who has to beat Obama in Pennsylvania and she’ll take anything she can get. If you are Catholic be assured that Mexico is coming to your church soon, and if you don’t believe it, just listen to New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg who reasons, along with the Pope, that we must welcome all the people of Mexico with open arms…or else their will be no social security checks coming to you baby-boomers.

I love the way politicians make subtle threats…don’t you?

Okay, it’s a full moon. Somewhere the Pope is looking at the same moon as I am tonight, flying back to the Vatican on Good Sheppard One. I can only hope he really is good friends with Jesus, because as this nobody witnessed, the Good Sheppard hath much pride. The fall is waiting.

Nobody’s Perfect: Americans are tired of our government consistently screwing us. We lost 50,000 young men to Vietnam, because our elite commies in the media and universities said we lost the Tet offensive, when we didn’t. But the real question is, why we were there in the first place? Communism was going to jump from South Vietnam into California? Hey, they were already here!

We now are losing boys in Iraq, and the question is…maybe we should be there, but why didn’t they do it right in the first place? And now that we are there, if a Democrat gets us out, all those boys, just like in Vietnam, lost their lives for nothing.

What’s the point here? Americans lose lives, and now wars...but now there are 460 billionaires in the United States.

Nobody Knows; Why President Bush does not condemn Jimmy Carter for talking to Hamas---nor will they ever.

Nobody Cares; Bush ran as a conservative Republican, he is not. He is a socialist globalist. Arnold Schwarzenegger ran as a conservative Republican: he is not. He is a socialist globalist. Hillary and Obama are at this very moment, running as conservative Republicans Socialists: they are not: they are communists. McCain says he is a conservative Republican, he is not. He could just be gay. I have no idea anymore. They all lie like politicians.

One thing for sure: They say they are all “public servants.” The problem is, the only public they are serving are the rich.

Nobody Wins; Has anyone else noticed that the world “Mormon” is never uttered in any report concerning that compound in Texas where they took 415 kids? Has anyone asked why over 1500 polygamist Mormon (oops, sorry) compounds have been allowed to exist in this country, when polygamy is against the law?

Does this mean laws mean nothing in American? If you say--- well yes they do, you could be right. Look up at that camera when you go through your next red light, and smile.

If they don’t care if the Mormons practice polygamy here, they certainly won’t care if the Muslims do. Guess that means I can have another husband.

Nobody’s Fool; The History channel is getting us primed to bring back the lovely habit of that misunderstood drug called marijuana. Yes, the government has attacked this drug that has harmed no one (while banning cigarettes at every chance) and it’s been atrocious what the government has done to millions who just want to get stoned and eat brownies on the couch while watching the Stooges.

This weekend, 10,000 college students in Colorado were allowed to light up and throw Frisbees on a university campus, while the police watched. That’s just about all you can manage when you’re stoned…throwing a Frisbee. Do not ride a bike.

George Soros, who is backing Obama, wants marijuana smoking legalized, for the obvious reason that a stoned citizen is a clueless moron.

Now the History Channel can add to its “Globalize Yourself,” slogan…” Light Up a Reefer!”

Frankly, I’m disgusted with my whole generation. Those of us with any sense left should just leave.

Where’s my Pope mobile?