Friday, February 22, 2008

Hillary's Child Care Program

Nobody Flashes Anymore!: Last night, in the Presidential Debate in Texas...Hillary Clinton assured the poor American public that, if she is not elected we will all be doomed, but we will be comforted to know, to ease our suffering, that we need not worry our silly heads about HER, because she has mansions all over--- some you don't even know about.

She'll be JUST fine. I already feel better, don't you?

And if she is not elected...don't you fret. Obama is likely to put her on the Supreme Court, where she can make sure that all US law follows the internationl laws of making sure all the babies in the world are well fed.

And Hillary cares about all the world babies, really, she does. The ones that get born at least.

Here we see a good example of one of Hillary's Universal Health Care plans. All the children will have thier own bowl, and be feed twice a day. They will also have one "green" plastic lego to play with while thier moms and dads are busy working for the "state," in the Hilliary Child Care Centers for the People, which will be in every town, in every nation.

Parents will not have to worry one bit, because when Hillary becomes President, she will make sure that the green paint on that lego is not tainted with lead. We have her word on that.

Now, just what would we do without her? What a woman.


Thursday, February 21, 2008

Abraham's Dilemma

Nobody’s Opinion:

“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal…”

Hold on.

I want to proclaim, unequivocally, that I am superior to the owner of my local gas station. I don’t know his name, but he is obviously a Muslim. Every time I get gas, when he sees my uncovered head and my blond hair, he gives me looks of disgust. Sometimes he even refuses to serve me gas…he just acts like I’m not there, and I have to leave. He hates me so much he doesn’t even care if he loses a sale.

Really, I’m not making this up.

I suppose if I walked in wearing a shawl he’d at least say “hello,” but I’m not sure.

Okay…I don’t own a gas station. But because I do not judge him by his “looks,” I consider myself vastly superior to this man, who I really wish would go home, and take his wife and kids with him.

I’m also Caucasian --- there is no affirmative action law for me. I have no grounds for discrimination.

Muhammad (my name for him) is a private shop-owner. He can refuse me if he wants to on the basis of his religion.

Thomas Jefferson meant well, but really…that wonderful statement could have used a few more words. Like “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are not created equal, but should be held equally accountable under the law, otherwise we’ll have a real mess.”

And that should go not only for all Muslims living here, but also for the superior “elite” men who “make” the laws that rule us all: the men from Harvard, Yale, and Oxford.

It all started with that guy Abraham---a man who could have been the poster boy for Viagra: a man whose testosterone was so off-the-chart that he started three religions.

Yes---historically speaking, if you have more than one wife, you’re asking for trouble.

It was Sarah, Abraham’s first wife, who kicked Hager and Abraham’s first son, Ishmael, out of Canaan, because she had not produced a son yet. Hager went off to start the Arab nations.

To be fair, Sarah was not producing children, beautiful as she was, and back then you needed all the kids you could get just to feed the camels.

Yes, the Christians, the Jews, and the Muslims, all from one guy’s loins, are now fighting it out on the bigger scale. What a mess he started. All fighting over who gets “Daddy’s” inheritance.

It seemed to have all started that one sunny day when Abraham got that urge to…“invade.” He said that God came to him in “Ur” and spoke---

For the Lord had said unto Abraham, get thee out of thy country, and from thy kindred, and from thy father’s house, unto the land that I will show thee.”
“And I will make of thee a great nation, and will bless thee, and make thy name great, and thou shalt be a blessing.”
“I will bless them also that bless thee, and curse them that curse thee, and in them shall all the families of the earth be blessed.”

Therefore, we can all claim to be blessed by God--- Muslims, Jews, and Christians, but for some reason, mankind has not figured that out yet.

Poor God, he has my sympathy on this one. (It’s part of my personal plan into heaven; give God a few “I understand” hugs.)

This same statement was used in a church sermon at White-Chappel, in London in 1609, by William Symonds. He used these exact words to convince the Virginia settlers to go to America, although he had trouble convincing the congregation that though it sounded, “unfair” it was okay.

“The country, they say, is possessed by owners that rule and govern it in their own right. Then with what conscience and equity can we offer to thrust them, by violence, out of their own inheritances?” he said.

Was he talking to himself here?

In 1609, England’s population was growing, her commerce and manufacturing were lagging, the unemployment increasing.

Symonds went on;

“The rich shopkeeper hath the good, honest, poor, laborer at such advantage that he can grind his face when he pleaseth. The poor metalman worketh his bones out and swelteth himself in the fire, yet, for all his labor, having charge of wife and children, he can hardly keep himself from the almsbox. England, our mistress, cannot compare.”

Feel familiar?

The good reverend gave his final answer: Abraham’s words--- “God giveth it to us.”

Something tells me this same reasoning is still being used today in the mind of my not-so-friendly gas station owner, and my local Mexican truck driver.

Yes, the invasion of -- “God giveth it to me” snatchers are here.

So---let me get this straight--- because we are all created “equal,” that means we cannot refuse to tolerate people coming into our American nation and making us slaves to their demands?

I bet if General Patton was in Canaan, Abraham might have just gone onto Egypt sooner.

But the story gets better; Later on Sarah finally had a son, (at the age of 119) Isaac. By all accounts, she deserved one. She was so old, that she was laughing about it, and everyone else thought it so absurd that they were all laughing about it, so Isaac means “to laugh” and that’s why Jefferson, like a true son of Isaac, added onto the Declaration, that one of our “unalienable Rights was life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.”

Americans are great laughers.

Then, God told Abraham to kill his son to show his faith, and so Abraham was going to do just that, but Isaac was saved by God’s Angel at the last minute, thank goodness, because if Abraham had killed Isaac, then all kinds of things wouldn’t have been invented; like airplanes, the electric light bulb, the automobile, oil refineries, and Hostess Cupcakes.

Let’s face it…some men are created superior…by evolution, or by God’s design, it doesn’t matter, it’s a fact. And all humans fight for their own survival, whether sanctioned by God or not.

Our founders knew that the “rule of law” was the only way to control man, who will, when giving the advantage, most of the time take it, despite his conscious, if he can use God as an excuse.

God saw what was coming long ago and gave Moses “The Ten Commandments,” which our founders also used as a basis for the “rule of law”.

Our founders, self-evidently speaking, were superior men.

So I humbly ask my ‘elite’ rulers now…where is the “rule of law” to protect me from my local gas-station owner, who would probably enjoy taking out a sword and cutting my hand off?

You tell me---all I see is a nation “ruled by men.”


Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Obama and Sponge Bob?

Nobody Flashes: At the Obama-orama blast last weekend, many of his ardent fans came out in the thousands to support his new, original, and wonderful message of hope, hope, and more hope...

As you can see from these fans, hope is needed in bucketsloads.

In fact, they are very hopeful that Obama will elect that man of all hope...SpongeBob to be his Vice President! A man (alway disguised as a Sponge) who fans are sure, if on the ticket, will boomerang the great Obama into the White House, and clean kitchens for everyone!

Change is on the way folks, and how very exciting it is! Just think, a sponge in every bucket...

After all, in order to fight McCain, he will need even more hope, and Sponge Bob always delivers.


Tuesday, February 19, 2008

You Need the Right Pitch; Who's More Scandelous---Roger Clemens or the U.S. Senate?

Nobody’s Opinion: It’s the bottom of the ninth. The score is tied---13 to 13---Team America is on the field and the bases are loaded…

Iran is on first. Ahmadinejad is grinning wildly, taking a wide lead off the base--- practically taunting the pitcher to watch for a steal. Just a few more steps and he will have the stuff he needs to get rid of that “Satan” nation, Israel, and then on to the great plans in place for the destruction of Team America forever.

Bernanke, the guy steering the American economy, is on second. The economy is so bad the government is sending us money to spend just so their stock options look good. He looks shaken---almost afraid to take his foot off the base because our schools are failing miserable, our cities decaying, and our universities a hotplate of leftist / communists. Our roads, water, and electrical grids go out at the least blast of wind. Bernanke eyes the Coach.

At third base is Mexico’s Vicente Fox; both hands on his knees, ready to burst into flight with an invasion of over one-hundred million Mexicans, who will cross home base and continue to flood up into the stands toward the people, stealing their hot dogs, sodas, and even their parking spaces with the crack of the bat.

All they need is one good solid hit to take over and win the game.

Forgive the terrible metaphor here, but I don’t think it’s half as bad as our “great” and “ethical” American Senate, who seemed to think investigating steroids in baseball is much more important than taking care of America’s many problems.

So, what are the great Senators doing while this dangerous situation is going on all around them?
Attacking a baseball pitcher, of all things, who they are making out to be worse than any dangerous Muslim terrorist, or Chinese spy…no, Roger Clemens is getting the full show of our Senate’s disgust.

Excuse me…I don’t remember the game of baseball being a big American threat, do you?

Oh…it’s the “doing for the kids” excuse again. That always works.

Gee---if they thought so much about our kids, why don’t they send the FBI to investigate our terrible education system, or the drugs dealers in the school halls, or gang violence on the streets, or…Sandy Burger's socks.
Most parents would say brain damage from marijuana, alcohol, Ritalin, or our current public school policies of indoctrinating socialism are a much greater threat then HGH.

To compete in the Major Leagues you have to be at the top one-percent of your field. Too bad the same criterion doesn’t apply for the office of Senate.

So, what’s a major-leaguer suppose to do? They either take HGH along with everyone else to compete, or don’t. It can mean the difference in paychecks.

And one must admit, Roger Clemens has delivered to his fans, HGH or not. Have our Senators?

It’s okay for politicians to do anything to win election, but not baseball players?

Baseball fans could solve this steroid question in a few seconds, without spending a dollar. After a certain year, (just pick one ) every player in the Baseball Hall of Fame gets an asterisk put next to his name, and get on with the game.

Besides, cleaning up the league is up to the players and the owners, not the Senate.

Frankly, I think our Senators have a lot of nerve.

If you want to see real damage to the American people, there is no better place to look than at the political scandals of many of our ‘fine’ Senators, past and present. Google ‘political scandals’ and the "crime"’ of HGH looks like a kid drinking an extra glass of milk, compared to the vast horrors against humanity committed by our high and mighty rulers.

So, why are they doing this idiotic thing? Well, why do so many of them leave office to go work for the big pharmaceutical companies?

Why did Bill Clinton, and President George Bush, give billions in Aids medicine to Africa, courtesy of us?

Who’s benefiting from all this “giveaway” stuff?

Here’s an educated guess; in his book “Natural Cures,” Kevin Trudeau says:

The European Union set up a directive on dietary supplements. It is part of a larger forum of world-wide legislation in which the government of the U.S. will probably call CODEX. This will severely restrict access to natural health products. A small group will control every drug every vitamin, every mineral, every herb and every substance put on your skin.”

It’s all about the patents. HGH, like DHEA, melatonin, and vitamin C can’t be patented, therefore, there is a big greedy grab to outlaw them and put them into the hands of the major pharmaceuticals companies…and Congress will help them.

The Senators are typically covering all their own a…I mean bases, for their own future.

Making a big deal out of steroids in sports is a well-played smoke-screen keeping your eye on the wrong ball.

So, baseball fans---with all the problems we are facing right now, who would you rather have pitching this punked-up game?

Yeah, me too.

Roger---take the mound.


Monday, February 18, 2008

Nothing Like Free Speech!

Nobody Flashes: This was sent to me by one of my liberal friends (Yes, I have a few!) It was a nice thing to get on President's's seems to be going around the internet...I have no idea where the "real" routine came from...but this kid will be on TV someday, I just bet...and that's what's so great about the internet...anyone can jump right on it!


Sunday, February 17, 2008

Nobody Reports On President's Day: "Houston--We Have a Problem"

Nobody’s Opinion: Boy do we. We have a bunch of space cadets walking around down here looking for a port. The port used to be the United States of America, but many of us can’t find it. Where in the nebula did it go?

“Roger, Roger…come in …Houston, can you read me?”

Down here on earth, in a nation that once was the leader of sanity, ingenuity, creativity and “a government of laws and not of men”, a final election is coming up, where the people are promised a “change.”

Change is not exactly the word I would choose; more like a final solution.

And arriving in that “change” is Universal Health Care, where the government will decide the final solutions on your life or death. Some bureaucrat in Washington D.C. will decide whether you receive that necessary surgery in time to save your life.

Vaccines will be mandated, whether good for you or not.

In that “change” there also will be demands that not only students do community service for the government, but everyone else as well---as Marx said: “Each to his abilities.”

Schools of public servants will be formed everywhere.

This “change” includes the forced and illegal merging of three continents, making one bi-lingual nation, while our very lives and national security is being ignored during the process.

It’s a “change” of state-indoctrinated babies and schools, where parents have no say over their children’s education or their upbringing. (Already in place, soon to be expanded.)

The “change” of the “green” machine of environmental governmental laws taking over property and mandating human behavior in the name of saving the plane: dictating what you can eat, where you can go, what you can drive, and the temperatures of your homes.

It’s the “change” of more insidious heavy taxation, and the government redistribution of your money to other countries.

Call it what you want---Socialism, Communism, Plutocracy, The Third Way, The New World Order, Globalization, Fascism--anyway you look at it, it looks nothing like the Republic that was started.

Remember that “Republic?”

John Adams, an important founder of this “Republic” once feared the reins of power and corruption taking over, even in his time.

John was in London after the revolution of 1776, when he received a letter from America--- “Jealousy, pride, and luxury, an unbounded thirst for baneful commerce, want of attention to the internal resources of their country…with a disregard to the importance of establishing a fair national character---seems to pervade the continent,” it said.

Poor John…our Constitution was being debated, and he was not there.

Ben Franklin was going for a single-branch legislation, instead of the divisions of the three legislative bodies that John had included in the first constitution of the States which he wrote---The Massachusetts Constitution, on which our own Constitution was based.

Despairing at the news from his new country that the newly formed government was deep in faction, with hostility everywhere, he locked himself in a room for weeks, to study all the history of governments, in order to put forth his ideas on just how important it was to put a government in place to stop greedy men from assuming too much power.

John saw that true democracy led to uprising---where laws were no longer respected, force would be the only rule, and someone would take over to restore order and guarantee the scrutiny of life and property at the cost of freedom.

So, he wrote, “In Defense of the Constitution” and sent it to all his buddies…Madison, Jefferson, Monroe…all the men who had fought so hard for independence.

His paper was full of misspellings, giving no credit to authors’ quotations, sometimes rambling while gathering the lessons of history, but John was writing for the people and the expediency of the moment. He had no time to polish and refine.

If the executive power or any considerable part of it is left in the hands of either an aristocratical or democratrical assembly, it will corrupt the legislature as necessarily as rust corrupts iron, or as arsenic poisons the human body; and when the legislature is corrupted, the people are undone.”

Right you are John, undone is not the word for it. Try desperate, bewildered—feeling so hopeless that they will follow any politician with promises of utopia, or free health care.

Follow them right into a black hole of tyranny.

Yes Houston, it seems, the aristocratic took over quite some time ago, and the people are undone. We’re floating around up here in the spaceship, “SOS.”

In 2008, the American people will have three left-wing candidates to choose from for President: John McCain, Barack Obama, or Hillary Clinton, whose only difference is on one point: the Iraq War. On all other matters they will continue the same agenda. An agenda so far to the left, if the country had a stroke, we would be speechless.

If John Adams were here, he would say it’s time for all the American People to organized and take over Mission Control, before his great American Republic ends up in some other galaxy---far, far away.

Houston….are you there?

Nobody’s Perfect: Michael Reagan, the son of Ronald Reagan, said last week that Republicans should all back John McCain, against all principle, because that’s what his father would do.

I love ya' Mike, but really. We like to remember the Ronald Reagan who hated communism more than anything and fought for its defeat. John McCain policies are light-galaxies left of Gerald Ford. You could have left us our hopes that the Ronald Reagan we knew would have turned instead to John McCain and said, “John---Put up this wall.”

Nobody Knows: One amazing woman acting like a space cadet out there is Ann Coulter. How a constitutional scholar, a woman of great America spirit, proclaim she will support Hillary Clinton, a leader who would lead this country into “progressive” state of fascism, instead of admitting, like John Adams would have, that our system needs to be overhauled rather than submitted to, is beyond me.

Nobody Cares: Our President, George Bush, is touring Africa today, spreading our hard-earned tax dollars all over the African Continent, in order to build roads, electrical grids, and power stations for the African people. Meanwhile, our electrical grids rot.

Nobody Wins: when Presidential candidates give Presidential election speeches in the Caymen Islands. (Mr. Huckabee)

Nobody’s Fool: John Adams, who was nobody’s fool said, “The people therefore must have a legal, constitutional and peaceable mode of changing these rulers whenever they discover improper principles or dispositions it them.”

As we see from our past decades, some of our rulers just won’t leave.

I don’t know about you, but maybe it’s time a few of our more sensible leaders should organized a new “American” congress--- far away from the corrupted cockpit called Washington D.C.

I’ll be the first one on board.


Still Messing Around

Well, heck. I'm trying to get up and going on Townhall, but they got more buttons here to fool with than I even care to count. As you can see, I from yesterday I was having so much fun designing letters and fonts, I gave up.
I can only deal with usually four buttons at the most, that's why I'm a lousey cook.'s my card. If this actually works, you have Doug Powers, to thank.
What? You don't know who Doug Powers is? Well....go here, and enjoy, you can thank me later.