Friday, January 26, 2007

Afflictive Accidents Of the State

Nobody’s Opinion:

As we all know, accidents do happen. I was flipping through the TV channels today to find something to listen to while I cleaned the kitchen, when it happened to me.

It was like seeing the car in front of you coming closer and closer, and in your rear view mirror you see the car in back of you coming up fast in the rear.

Knowing---there is nothing you can do to stop it.

So you close your eyes because you know what is going to happen…the awful sound of steel crunching, wheels screeching, and the whole world spinning around while you wait for the final impact from the back after hitting the car in front and you wonder to yourself before the final impact, “Am I going to live?”

Yes, there she was, our new accident waiting to happen Hillary Rodham (forget that I’m a Clinton) on C-Span talking to all the mayors of the United States.

And like every human being on the earth, I had to slow down to watch the damage. I dropped the sponge on the floor.

She was SO excited---she was ready! She was looking forward to her takeover of the earth! Why, you could tell that she couldn’t WAIT till she becomes President, she had to take over now…get every one going…such plans for the future!

There was so much she wanted to do! First, you mayors need to get some of those abandoned lots sitting around in all your cities and put up some wind mills! Not only will it help the energy problem, but it will give some immigrants and laid off Ford Motor people jobs!

When Hillary becomes President, we will have windmills on every Wal-Mart parking lot, every school yard, and every house.

Universal Health care is coming too boys! Oh, you have NO idea how long she has waited for this one.

Everyone will have universal health care! Finally, we are going to get what Cubans and Hollywood movies stars have been raving about for years.

Yes, her face was lit up like a lunar moon shot.

Since the schools are so bad, she thinks it would be a good idea for all the mayors of the cities to just take them over. Forget those elected board members of the community, one man can take care of it, and the Feds will help.

In fact, the Feds should help out with natural disasters. They should take that over too. Katrina showed us the necessity of it.

And we must get these pre-school programs going if we are going to compete with the other third world nations!

And sadly, crime has gone up she says. We need more cops. Everywhere.

After the accident I was bleeding pretty badly.

I mean, I knew the day that I saw Hillary being sworn in as Senator just by the look on her face, and that huge grin, that she knew she was going to be allowed to be President. I suspected that some forces that play behind the big global scene had already decided it. I don’t think she was really sure till that day.

But somewhere inside me I had hope that someone, somewhere, somehow would stop the Clintons from taking over the world.

That’s why she doesn’t have to run too hard. She didn’t have to run in New York. She just showed up to a couple of parades. It was all so easy for her.

That’s also why she is not letting the media come to her “visits” on her trip to Iowa. She controls who comes into her town hall visits, and it doesn’t matter!

And you say we have a free press? All reporters should be allowed into her “showings.”
She is running for the office of the President of United States of America, and we all need to her what she is saying.

Jimmy Carter does the same thing. He gets to screen his questions.

Where are the reporters? Does everything have to be staged just for her?

You’d think we were witnessing elections in China or Cuba.

And THEN she said it, at the end of her speech, I couldn’t believe it…she said it, she said…

“Global government will be IN YOUR FACE.”

Since when does an elected United States Mayor have to deal with global government?

Basically telling the boys that she knows all that she is going to hand down from the UN, and her husband. The federal global orders will be hard to take, but she was sure they could handle it. It’s Okay boys, I’ll be here to guide you.


I don’t know why people don’t report this stuff. It didn’t make it even to Glenn Beck.

All these communistic visions of Hillary utopia hit me like a fuel tanker going 150 mph, on the freeway of nightmares.

Unless someone stops her, like Giuliani, we are all going to end up lying in the ditch.

Just remember, once she gets in, she will never want to leave. Bill at least takes whole days off for his addictions, but he never left…what makes you think she will?

Imagine eight year of Hillary Clinton on your TV: Eight more years of Bill Clinton.

Then try to imagine where you will hide while America goes from European socialism to plain old communism in a few short years.

Something tells me the first flights to the moon are already booked.

And if Hillary has her way, there will be wind mills on the moon when you get there. The fact that there IS no wind there will not matter.

Comrades, I ask you…do you have insurance?

And it really doesn’t matter who’s in the backseat. All the backseat drivers can complain and moan all they want. Hannity, Rush, Laura, Ann, you and me: the fact is, Hillary is driving now, and short of her own accident she will do what she wants, and she knows exactly where she is taking us all.

Perdition, USA.

Nobody’s Perfect; Now, I know many conservatives don’t like Giuliani, but according to polls, he is the only one who can beat her. Why? Because he was the only elected official who wasn’t sitting in a bunker somewhere during 9/11.

Actually, there was ONE other that could have beaten her, but he had a bad plane accident, which was very fortuitous for Hillary, otherwise he would have taken her place as the senator from New York. John F. Kennedy Jr. unlike Hillary, actually lived there.

Accidents do happen.

This nobody is betting that republicans will run John McCain, because we have seen these last eight years that they are all in this global bed together.

Newt Gingrich would have a good chance of beating her, and for that very fact, he won’t run.

Nobody Knows; I think if Ann Coulter or Laura Ingram ran against her, she would lose. But we all know they are too honest and decent to run.

Nobody Cares; Every time Bill Clinton opens his mouth he is spouting out wind mills. Bill and Hillary have stock in Wind Mills?

By the way, as you can tell, I actually was involved in an “accordion” car accident once when I was young. The guy that caused the seven car pile up, as expected, got away.

Lincoln, Madeleine Abright, and the Pigs

Nobody’s Opinion:

I starting reading “The Mighty & the Almighty” today by Madeleine Albright, when I came upon one of those “endearing” old fashion fables, often thrown into speeches by the “mighty” in order to explain to you, the lowly moron, some usually exorbitant and almost criminal behavior that they, the “mighty” do with no conscience.

Nine times out of ten, the purpose of which is to make you think they are wonderful, (and near GOD-like) and to give you a “good” feeling about how they, the “almighty,” rob your hard earned money and give it away.

Bill Clinton peppers all his speeches with little “stories” and they are usually told with big emotional bravado endings bringing Bill Clinton into his orgasmic finale. I’m surprised he doesn’t take an orchestra of violins on the road with him.

They must learn this little technique at their Georgetown University International Foreign Class on “How To Tell A Good Lie, 101.”

It’s always best to include a popular figure from history.

The stories always sound like they could be true…until you hear the punch line. You could think of them as basically bad jokes, if you could dismiss the fact that the bad joke is usually on you.

Madeleine (i.e. Marie Jana Korbelova’) sets up this story in the book by saying how she thought after she became Madame Secretary of State she should actually SEE the world and VISIT real people to see how her actions as Secretary of State would affect the average man or woman.

It was also a great excuse for Madeleine to travel around the world on Air Force Two, stay at the best hotels, and sip cognac while eating steaks at the best restaurants.

Up until that time she was trying very hard not to imagine what everyone was going through, and succeeding at it, I might add.

I would like to tell you that she visited an American family to see how her actions affected them--- but of course that would have ruined her DNA sequences.

The last time the old gal even came CLOSE to an average American person, like an owner of a gas station, was when her limo had to get a tire change in Kansas.

Anyway, she starts the story “lesson” with a memory from her visit to Africa.

“I remember,” she says, “especially, holding a three-year-old girl in Sierra Leone. Her name was Mamuna; she wore a red jumper and played happily with a toy car using her one arm. A soldier had chopped the other arm off with a machete. I could not comprehend how anyone could have taken a machete to that girl.”

She continues, “At each stop, I wished I could have bought all of America with me. Given the opportunity to see the wretched conditions in which so many people must live, I was sure we would respond with urgency and generosity. As soon as I returned, I would enumerate all the practical reasons Americans should care; because we had an interest in stability, in prosperous overseas markets, in strengthening the rule of law, in extending our influence, and in burnishing our reputation.”

Now if you read this statement and take it at face value, the reasons she gives at the end sound much like the very same goals that President Bush says over and over. Pat Buchanan comes right out and calls it American imperialism.

Why is it that when a Democrat talks about world domination it’s ALWAYS because they are SAVING the world.

But when the Republicans say the same thing, they are destroying it.

Well, here’s Madeleine’s story…one that, probably was handed down by Lincoln himself, but never happened.

I like to call it; Lincoln and The Pig.

Lincoln one day was walking, and he had a very nice lawyer’s suit on. He passed a pig that was caught in a muddy bog. He kept walking…but then 2 miles down the road he turned around and came back, and helped the pig out.

When someone asked him why he did that, because he ruined his suit, Lincoln said;

I didn’t do it for the pig; I did it for me…to take the pain out of my mind.”

You tell me…was this about as big as a Freudian slip as anyone could make? Does this not sound like the Democratic rationalization for every thing they do?

Global warming, saving the world, using wealth redistribution to give to the whole world, at the expense of our own good suit, they do this so that they can get rid of their pain?

And does this mean that all the “mighty” think we, the “un-mighty” are all pigs in the mud?

The sublimal message here is quite revealing.

Did not our Congress just make a meaningless “not-binding” resolution against the war in Iraq, so as to ease their own pain?

Madeleine says, “If Lincoln could recognize his self interest in rescuing a pig at the cost of his suit, America should be able to see its stake in helping people to escape their own desperate circumstances”

Well, Madame Madeline, isn’t that exactly what we are DOING in Iraq, a war that you have said is the worst blunder in history?

What---that’s NOT what you meant? You only meant we should give billions to Africa?

Explain this to me…I feel like a pig stuck in the mud out here.

Evidently Maddie’s great sympathy for the children of the world did not extend to Rwanda, or to the sanctions against Iraq which she put on during her “reign” as Secretary of State.

In 1996, Lesley Stahl, on 60 minutes said: “We have heard that half of a million children have died. I mean, that’s more children that died in Hiroshima. And, you know, is the price worth it.?”

Albright: “I think it was a really hard choice, but the price, we think the price was worth it.”

In other words, there is no mud in Iraq, according to her.

Later on she said it was a stupid statement. In her mind her opinions may have changed, but not the fact that she is right. After all, she says that the main purpose of foreign policy is to persuade other countries to do what we want.

I don’t get it. I thought we were NOT supposed to impose our democracy on others, according to the Democrats. As she says in her book; “We do not have a divine calling to spread democracy any more than we have a national mission to spread Christianity.”

And this thinking is EXACTLY what is destroying America.

Right, we’ll just wait for the OTHER guys who want to kill us come over and use their divine right to do it.

You might think that this woman is either:

A. extremely stupid because she doesn’t see the difference in a Muslim cutting off a girl’s arm for no reason, and soldiers in Iraq trying to help people establish some sort of real life.

B. she is extremely spoiled rotten and narcissistic and could care less what anyone thinks, but wants to solve all the pigs problems in order to reliever her own pain.

Or C. She has been groomed to be just what she is: the Real Miss Piggy.

Someone should have sent her to hog heaven moons ago.

Since the story of Lincoln and his pig, I am very excited to read the rest of the book, maybe she will sneak in the one where George Washington actually told quite a few lies, NOT to save the pigs, but because he was in so much pain.

I can’t wait.

Nobody’s Perfect; She tells another story about while her twins were suffering in intensive care, Madeline went out and learned Russian in one month to forget her “pain.” Oh sure, she was probably shipped off to Russia by the Council of Foreign Relations to study at the Lenin University in Moscow with Bill.

The stories they make up…jeeez.

This woman has more degrees than then shark has teeth. And even after all that training, she STILL gave Kim Jong IL of North Korea nuclear power, and billions to built up his nuclear war chest.

Nobody Knows; It’s a small world for these elites. They all go to the same world elite training schools. Like Clinton, Madeleine studied Foreign Relations at Georgetown University. Like Hillary, she got a degree at Wesley. Condoleezza Rice was trained by Madeleine’s father who was the dean of the Graduate School of International Studies at the University of Denver.

After her job as Madame Secretary, in 2003, she was put on the board of the New York Stock Exchange, where she appointed all the members.

Funny, I don’t remember seeing that she had a degree in economics.

She had to resign after Dick Grasso (one of her appointees) made 187.5 million. She wasn’t paying too much attention.

So, did he hide some money in the dumpster ya think?

Nobody Cares; She is now training future communists in foreign relations at Georgetown. Her official title is: Mortara Distinguished Professor of Diplomacy.

What the hell is a Mortara? Pig latin for Medusa?

She also is the Chairperson of the National Institute for International Affairs and the Co- Chair of Legal Empowerment of the pigs, I mean poor.

Frankly Madaline, if you see me lying in the mud, I’d appreciate it if you just leave me there. I wouldn’t want you to get your suit dirty.

Thursday, January 25, 2007

Nobody’s Opinion: Red Alert: Imagine you are in an argument with a woman who considers herself a “feminist.” Let’s also say that she is really making you very angry because she refuses to acknowledge the many differences between the sexes, or maybe that there are SOME things a woman just can’t do. (There are also some things men can’t do, but, that’s another blog.)

She is beating you on every argument, and you want to really piss her off. You’ve had enough.

Well, I have just found out a way that you can get her so upset, she will instantly walk away from you, (doesn’t matter if you’re a man or a woman) defeated, and probably will go home and be so mad at you, she will immediately walk in her door and run to the phone to call up her best friend and talk about how ignorant you are for hours.

And it won’t matter how longs she talks…the damage will have been done.

I should charge you for this secret, but for the admiration of the writing talents of the lady whom I learned it from, I will just pass it on.

The secret is: Call her a “princess.”

According to Peggy Orenstein of the New York Times, a woman who considers herself a proud American feminist, in her piece called “What’s Wrong With Cinderella?” it is the one thing that all the feminists are upset about nowadays.

You see, THEIR daughters are running around wanting to be Ariel, or Snow White, and it’s driving them absolutely crazy! The thought of their daughters wanting to grow up to be princesses instead of career woman like their mothers is almost unbearable.

Peggy sees the culprit of this cultural obscenity coming from the very successful “Princess Line” of merchandizing put out by Disney, which has started a revolution of little princesses running around squealing in little tutu’s, with pink bracelets and pink slippers on their little feet, and dreaming of finding very handsome princes one day, probably in the mall.

Oh the horror of it all.

It’s driving them mad, because they just can’t fight it. There is pink revolution that has been spurred on by the mass marketing of Disney and Barbie, and soon to be the upcoming onslaught of Tinker Bell merchandize. (Due to a new Disney animated film about Peter Pan, based on the bestsellers novels by Ridley Pearson and Dave Barry)

Tinker Bell will be a bit more feisty and independent, but still remember---- Peter is her master.

How can they possibly raise girls that are “equal” to men, who mom wants to grow up and become a lawyer or the next world leader, with this “princess” junk in every mall and store? There is also the fear that she might always be looking for that man to take care of her, and be happy just being someone’s wife.

Nobody thinks; on the one hand, being upset about Disney’s Princess Line is about as absurd as banning Harry Potter books, but on the other hand, there might be something to this.

I had a precious “princess” moment in my life once that made me give her theory some thought.

(Oh no…another Joyanna moment.)

Unlike most girls, I did not grow up playing with dolls. They bored me to death. My idea of a good time was to go out and walk in the swamps and try to find snakes to talk to.

Don’t worry, I wasn’t abused. I had a rat terrier who could take a rattle snake’s head off in a matter of minutes.

But, I never let her, because I only talked to the snakes that were just sunning. Most of them were asleep. Which is why I married my husband…he sleeps when I talk, snoring like a rattler…therefore I’m right at home.

And when I was a little girl, I hated the color pink, the true color of a princess. I STILL hate the color pink. To this day I do not own any piece of pink clothing, lipstick, bedspread…you would have a hard time finding anything the color pink in my house.

If I ever saw a pink roach, I would probably get a gun.

But, I did see, like most kids my age, Disney’s Cinderella. I don’t remember “when” I saw it, I just remember that I was young and the message was:

Be very pretty and someday this very handsome prince will find you and marry you, and you will live happily ever after…in a big castle somewhere in Germany, after you get down from the horse. Actually, you won’t even have to walk; Prince Charming will carry you everywhere.

The film did not mention taxes, diapers, flu, strokes, sick kids, car accidents, aids, or vast political conspiracies.

So, being as it was the training film for all girls, I must admit, when you are little it makes you think that’s how life is, and will be someday. You also know if you are NOT Cinderella, this prince might have trouble finding you. It’s always in the back of your mind. Any girl would be lying if she says it’s not.

Parents of course fail to tell you it’s a fairy tale. To them, they are getting a few hours rest, or paying the bills while you are parked in front of the TV watching Cinderella, having no idea that you are watching “Debbie Does Dallas” right after your tape of Cinderella stopped.

This explains what happened to Madonna.

Anyway, Peggy’s article took me back to a very precious memory. It takes place on the steps of Sleeping Beauty’s Castle, in Disneyland, Anaheim.

It’s about eleven o’clock at night, the year is around 1978, and my best friend from high school and I, after having spent the whole day in this magical fairy tale of an invented Kingdom, don’t want to leave. We hadn’t seen each other for years, and Shelly was about as close a friend as I ever had.

So, there we were sitting and watching the hordes of thousands of tired people dragging their little kids and packages, moving slowly in mass down that truly fairy tale lane, Main Street.

We also decided to be the last people to leave.

The Castles is lit up; it’s a beautiful and warm California night. And we start talking.

“Gee, did you see Disney’s Cinderella Shelly?

“Yeah, what a bunch of crock. That movie has ruined millions of women lives. Here we are forever waiting for our prince, and he is NOT coming. It was the biggest scam lie ever told in history, and I hate Walt Disney for messing us all up,” she said.

Poor Walt.

I could say nothing, but her words at the time had a truthful ring to it.

After all, hadn’t I done nothing but wish every single day for my prince charming? Life seemed so hard. Did I get that lesson that I was going to have to take care of myself until I died, with no help from anyone? Did I get this “helplessness” from Cinderella? Did I think I was somehow “not quite loveable enough” because of that film?

Could I support myself? Would I die without finding someone to love? At the time, it seemed so.

We both felt the disappointment that life was far from what we had expected it to be. Then we proceeded to not remember where we parked the car.

And this was even when the whole lot was already empty.

It took us four hours to find it. Which to us was real proof that neither one of us was capable of existing without help from SOMEONE…

It turned out to be a parking lot cop.

Shelly, I found out later on, had a reason to be cynical. She was living in Watts at the time with a pimp, making her living as a prostitute. She had moved from the Midwest to Los Angles because her parents had divorced when she was seventeen.

To say her parents breakup at that stage in her life messed her up pretty bad, is an understatement. No Cinderella story there.

But in her article Peggy says “Cinderella is a symbol of the patriarchal oppression of all women, another example of corporate mind control.”

Gee, as I remember, the Prince actually SAVED Cinderella from her wicked stepmother. What was Cinderella suppose to tell the prince?

“Buzz off! I’m going to the dance alone; I don’t need YOU Mr. Prince Charming!”

Little girls have wanted to be princesses since the word was invented. Disney only saw the big bucks in it. No corporate mind controls here, just lots of sales.

Peggy also talks affectionately about how in the 1990’s the third-wave-feminists, (I guess that means I was in the first wave) embraced words like “bitch” and “slut” as terms of affection.

Right--- women are really getting equal here; they can call themselves sluts anytime, just like the men do.

And then it dawns on her that all these little girls running around might go from pink…to sexy red, and then to porn stars, as sure as the sun shines.

This woman works herself up into a real nightmare. All the time her little daughter is happily playing princess and waving wands, and going to Princess Parties.

I felt like sending here a get-well card.

In the end, I am all for little girls playing princess. Come on…this is really getting silly.

All daughters should be the “princess” of their parent’s eyes, especially their fathers. There is nothing wrong with fantasizing about being a beautiful fairy tale.

Most of us grew up thinking there was a Santa Claus didn’t we? Hope and faith that life will turn up good things come with the package of imagination.

If you can stay there, it can help you through the dark hours.

And if they grow up believing that their father thinks they are very special, they are less likely to grow up to be “bitches” and “sluts.”

It will be Daddy eyes that guide them, not Walt Disney.

And if you are lucky enough to have a loving Dad, who will always see you as his little “princess,” odds are, you will grow up to be a very capable woman someday.

And you will smash Barbie’s head in. (No…just kidding)

You won’t be afraid if your daughter wants a pink bedroom, because you know, it’s just a phrase she is going through. She is only doing what comes natural to her.

So I’d say, go ahead and read Cinderella to her, just mix in a few Harry Potter books, the new Peter Pan books, and maybe some Stephen King to get her ready for real life.

Mix the pink with some green and purple. Kids are real flexible.

I was very happy to have discovered this that the whole Princess thing was driving the feminists crazy.

Therefore I suggest that all conservatives from now on address all liberal feminists with the world “Princess” in front of their first names.

Princess Hillary, the Princess of Pink.

If you are a feminists, go ahead and put Punk-ass in front of it. Show us how tough you are.

Much better than Madame President.

Nobody’s Perfect; Peggy also stated; “According to theories of gender constancy, until they’re about 6 or 7, children don’t’ realize that the sex they were born with is immutable. They believe they have a choice: they can grow up to be either a mommy or a daddy.”

What loony psychiatrist came to this conclusion?

I found this statement really funny. Poor Peggy, she had no clue she was of the female “sex” until she was seven? Perhaps this explains that those women who are “feminists” were born with a severe handicap and we should all cut them some slack.

Nobody Knows; She says that she doesn’t want her little girl to be a fish without a bicycle; she wants her to be a fish with another fish.

How can you argue with that? She better stock up on fish food.

Nobody Cares; I have lots of Tinker Bell stuff all over the house. I am also a BIG Disney fan. The old Disney. (Actually, the newer Disney is pretty good too.)

Dopey is another character that I identify with because I have lost my car more times than I care to admit in parking lots. In fact, I have “dopey” moments at least five times a day.

Wait, I did remember something. I DO actually like pink ties on men. I think it if the guy is a real man, it makes him all the more sexy. Because he is SO sure of his masculinity, he is not afraid to wear pink.

Then again, if he had on pink underwear, I might gag.

But that’s the only exception.

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Congress Has A Night Out; Nobody Has A Night In

Nobody’s Opinion; Here, in the sequence that I observed it, is a synopsis of the all the political events of the night of President Bush’s State of the Union address, and a nobody’s interpretation from the bleachers, where the home run, sadly was caught by the guy in front of me.

Warmup; Hillary Clinton was on MSNBC being interviewed by the dweeb with the glasses, and made it very clear that she was in control of the country now. She was very impressive in making everyone understand that she now had vast knowledge of who was fighting who in Iraq and Iran, (Shities vs Sunni’s), and that a “military” solution was not the answer.

She did not mention that today Ahmadinejad said that America will be destroyed soon.

: Wow, what guts! She is actually assuming the Presidency by acting as IF she is already President! Might work---she did this by talking about the President’s poor judgment and how he is not doing what she says ought to be done, as if he now has no power at all and he WILL move aside.

After all, she keeps calling him and telling him what she wants to be done she said. She is getting very impatient. (She only mentioned her blog about 87 times.)

Not having read the Constitution lately, she doesn’t care that she is not President YET…and can’t dictate to him. Getting rid of her “Attila the Huness” image is going to take real work.

All said mind you, in a very sweet, Jimmy Carter way. God forbid she looks anything but sweet and reasonable.

Nevertheless, a very clever way to win the election, just pretend you are President already.

Nobody parks her weary and muscle aching body on bed to get ready to watch the game---flipping between stations, just to see the spin.

The Game begins;

; All the black caucus member and celebrities of the Congress came very early so as to get near the Isle. It’s very important to get their faces on camera and also to get President Bush’s autograph when he exists the room.

Nobody: Despite the fact that they hate him with a passion that runs near hysterical proportions, that autograph must be worth something. I was wondering how many would sell their prized possessions on e-bay, and for what price?

If I were him, I would have signed their cards with the name, Pee-Wee Herman.

Enter the First Lady and Mrs. Cheney: They came in to nice applause. The First Lady Laura Bush looked spectacular in a red suit with dazzling buttons, added on in the special effects by some guy in the studio who must have said, “Hey, let’s add some stars to her buttons! Let’s make them twinkle like crazy! ”

Mrs. Cheney was in white, with no dazzling anything.

Nobody: It was the first time in television history that buttons have twinkled! Entertainment was taken to new heights. I expect this novel effect to appear soon on American Idol.

If you were watching their body language, these two women looked like they actually wanted to kill each other, but knew they have to put on a good face for the party. So they just didn’t look at each other.

So, what’s the big fight about? Since I like both ladies, this was not a good sign.

The President Speaks; “MADAME SPEAKER… (huge applause), you’re father would be proud.”

Nobody: Why did Nancy change her outfit at the last moment? Saying she spilled chocolate on her suit, was really funny. She knows we ALL love chocolate. The spin politicians put out is always funnier than the truth.

Remember when President Bush fell off the couch and hurt himself on a pretzel?

We are told that Nancy has told all the Democrats that even though they actually hate the President, tonight they must show the American people that they are true bi-partisan leaders and applaud him when he comes in, no matter how they feel about him.

Which they do---and then they continue to follow Nancy’s lead like puppets through the whole speech. They stand and applaud, when SHE stands and applauds.

No individuals here. But then again, that’s been going on at every State of the Union address by the Democrats ever since, who knows when.

Vice President Cheney nobody noticed always looks like he is bored to death; he has that turtle-looking poker face. He was attacked today by another turtle face, John McCain, who blamed Cheney for the mess in Iraq.

Let’s face it---John McCain is a double agent for Putin.

Anyway, it was a good idea to acknowledge the first woman speaker, even if she reminds you of your local PTA leader, and has about as much sense.

President and the Economy: We must balance the budget.

Nobody: Oh really? When, in 3057?

President: Do not raise taxes. Dick Cheney stands up. Nancy sits, and does not move or applaud. Hillary…smirks. Does not applaud.

Nobody: Oh boy, look out, they will tell you they are going to tax the rich, but no matter what party says it, and it’s always the middle class that gets banged.

The rich hide their money in foreign accounts. We hide our in our closets.

If we get banged any further, we will have to start rationing our drinking water.

President and Earmarks: 90% of the earmarks are never even seen by the Congress he says.

: NOW they admit it? Well, that’s not going to change any time soon.

President and School Choice: He knows the system sucks. Nancy, being a puppet of the school unions, did not clap.

: NO….no way are the Democrats going to improve our schools. Dumb kids are easy to control, and the more people working for the government the more the vast and powerful elite will continue to have power.

It will never change, but President Bush gains a point for suggesting it.

President and Health Care; Well…it needs to be fixed he says, and Nancy jumped so high she almost went out of the screen.

The President also called for Medical Liability reform. Nancy did not like that one bit.

In fact she sort of growled.

Nobody; Since the Democrats are the party of lawyers and get most of their money from suing everyone, this will not change either. Universal health care will be here soon. Get your operation NOW, or you will end up like Castro.

Don’t wait for that heart attack; go in for your by-pass now.

President and the Immigrants: We must pass temporary workers reform, not amnesty.

Nobody: Actually, if he really meant this, it would probably be okay. Canada has a program where the illegal’s work for so many months and then HAVE to go home.
But, that won’t happen here, and he knows it, so why not say what the American people want to hear?

It sounded good. I wish it were true. But, not only will you not hear too many democrats talk about immigration, I doubt if you hear too many republicans say much either.

The American people are REALLY angry about it, and they know it, so they will just give it lip service as before.

In the meantime, if your kids don’t learn how to speak Spanish, they will have trouble getting a job.

President and Energy: He mentioned it all…solar, wind, nuclear, batteries, ethanol, and horses--- (wait, he left that out.)…but THIS time he did not mention drilling in Alaska.

What, did he decide to drop that?

When he mentioned global climate change, all the Democrats leaped out of their seats as if they had just witnessed Babe Ruth’s home run record finally being broken., or they had just heard that the 22nd amendment had been repealed, leaving it open for Bill to run again.

It was truly amazing that Ted Kennedy stopped reading.

Nobody: Great---we spend enough now for gas, just how much are we going to get socked for paying for all this NEW technology, and how many people are going to be killed by driving tiny little itty-bitty cars?

And where are they going to put all those discarded batteries? Colorado?

I thought they didn’t want to pollute?

I suggest they all donate their big pensions for more research.

President and Iraq; He was great here. He really hasn’t changed his story since the 9/11 attack. And much of what he said makes perfect sense.

It’s pretty clear the President is right on this one. And the Democrats are not. When he stated we needed victory, Nancy did NOT stand up.

Good thing too. We might have mistaken her for being something she’s not, which is pragmatic, honest, smart, etc.


NOBODY goes for popcorn break; Okay, he was doing great, spoke well, looked good. If taken literally the speech would have been a home run, but then again, how can we believe any of our politicians when they all have betrayed us in so many ways. Where are my glasses? Where’s the Advil? Where is the Pepto?

End of Intermission

President…continues; He goes into how we need volunteers to go and spread democracy all over the world, more money for aids in Africa, and to cure malarias in Africa, and also, we should give trade and deficit relief to the debtors of other nations.

Nobody; I personally could have done without this part.

He should have said “I forgive all credit card debt for all Americans due to the fact that you are so overtaxed that you cannot even afford to live anymore on what you are making, have no money like the rich to buy stock.”

“Therefore, as a National Security problem, I, as President will issued an executive order that all America’s credit card debt will be forgiven.”

Well, why not?

Okay, here comes the multinational corporation’s globalist agenda.

The middle class will get even poorer because we will have not only 92, 000 more troops to put into our military, but thousands of “paid volunteers” signing up to go all over the world and hand out American taxpayer’s money.

And just what is it in Africa that the all the rich people want so badly that WE the American people, people who can’t afford our own drugs for our own illnesses, have to fork over to supply other nations with free drugs, in order for the rich to get what they want?

Which is who knows what? Diamonds, oil…land? Military bases? (Sigh)

In the end, it was a great speech, until the end part where WE once again are to support the whole frigging world.

I’m getting a little tired of the world getting so much from us, and we getting so little from our leaders.

Which means, the illuminati, are in power, and yes the rich are getting richer, the middle class will be drained of every last dime and their even their children’s dimes…because the New World Order is coming to us all.

But before that, we will be attacked.

Jack Bauer has warned us, and every one knows the jihads are already here.

President Bush ended with: The state of the union is good.

Nobody says; It is about to change for the worst, pass the vodka.

Nobody’s Perfect; After his speech, came a Jim Webb democratic rebuttal. He mentioned New Orleans, (which was not Bush’s fault) and how a CEO now makes 400 times the average company worker. (This is true). What he doesn’t say, is that the democrats will do nothing about the REALLY rich, it’s the rich middle class they will tax. You are rich to them if you make over $30,000. A year.

But then he stared talking about how he used to wait up for his dad at night, who served overseas in WWII.

My husband pointed out that this guy was about thirty, and probably wasn’t even born yet.

He showed a picture of his dad, and said he took it to bed with him every night. (Yes, it’s getting that bad.)

He was also a Vietnam veteran. (This means he’s against Iraq) I’m sure he knew John Kerry.

President Bush took us recklessly into the war he said.

And if he doesn’t listen to us, “We will show him the way.”

He failed to mention where they would take him but it was a clear threat to President Bush to not try for victory, or he would get taken down.

Nobody Knows; Just how much joy our enemies got out of seeing half our Congress siding against the President and his war in Iraq. They are salivating with visions of their victory dancing in their jihads’ heads.

Nobody Cares; …I’m finally speechless.

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Nobody's Absurdities, No. 34: State Of The Intrinsically Perverted Union

Nobody’s Opinion:

Today, January the 22, was according to experts who get paid millions to research such important matters, the most depressing day of the year. So in order to not rock the boat, I decided to go along with the herd and searched the web to find evidence of this day full of Prozac promise, and found, not to anybody’s amazement, the resonance of whatever killed the Romans, come full circle…

Which is to say--- many say the Romans were so busy having sexual orgies, that they had no energy left to defend their country, therefore, because our culture is so “decadent” in at least many Muslims eyes, Western civilization will be destroyed by….

Brittany Spears?

Here are a few of the warnings of perverted human behavior from today…and if they don’t depress you, then you are just too happy because you just got home from an orgy, where five girls ravished your body. (At least you THINK that’s what happened because you were too drunk to remember.)


The big news, that is so disturbing thousands of hard men are working diligently into the night to correct it, is the subject of “coming” to your home theatre soon….HD-DVD/ Blue-nay porn.

Wow, try THAT on your new 70” plasma TV! What could be wrong with that?!

The problem is that the new crisp and revealing picture is showing so many things that were once easy to cover-up.

Huge blobs of cellulite on thighs, razor burns, pimples, winkles around the eyes, warts, nose hairs, varicose veins, cesarean scars, stretch marks, and leftovers from yesterday’s co-star, are seen blown-up ten times bigger than your head.

What’s a porn star to do?

Even the silicone lines are showing up, and many girls are rushing to have MORE plastic surgery. This is a serious problem.

But have no fear…one girl said she just puts on more suntan makeup.

I want to know, how is she going to keep it on? Mix it with concrete?

And speaking of perverts, Devlen, the guy who decided he wanted two little boys in Missouri to keep as his “pets” so he just kidnapped them, was wondering just how he was going to tell his parents about what he had done.

Can you imagine this? He had no remorse about the poor boys parents, or the poor kids he screwed up for life…just how he was going to explain things to his mom and dad.

The bad news is, that he has decided to start talking to reporters, so that he can give every slimy detail of what he did, and the poor kids will have to suffer everyone in the world knowing how they were sadistically abuse, AGAIN, in horrible detail.

Somehow, I think this niceness that we’ve seen from the parents will begin to disappear, don’t you?

And because it will sell papers, no one will stop it.

Not depressed yet? Well, just wait…there’s more.
Broadway has a new hit! Yes! It’s about teenagers and the “feelings” they are having going through puberty. And it’s all about…sex.

But they gave it a Hillary Clinton title: “Spring Awakening”

How stupid.

Some guy masturbates in the middle of the stage, and sings about how wonderful it is while girls are dancing around him! Yes, sexuality is talked about…homosexuality, bestiality, just all the wonderful things you can do to make yourself feel good.

I bet Bill Clinton was there on opening night.

I was about to be shocked by this and disgusted, when I remembered that this was done once before, on at one time the longest running musical on Broadway, “Hair”

Because only on a Broadway musical could you see a whole flock of people stand naked on stage every night. (I bet Bill Clinton was there every weekend.)

Yes, Hair launched the whole hippie, leftist, commie, let’s all have sex because it’s so natural, screw religion, generation of baby boomers who grew up to rule our nation.

It also made having sex without having to take care of the consequences oh so fashionable.

For instance, one of the actors lines: “I wish my mom and dad would make a speech to their teenagers and say “kids, be free, be whatever you are, do whatever you want to do, jus so long as you don’t hurt anybody.”

Pretty much the liberal’s motto of today.

I remember one song in particular
Sodomy, Fallatio, cunnilingus, pederasty (men and boys)
Father, why do these words sound so nasty?
Masturbation can be fun! Join the holy orgy Kama Sutra, Everyone!

Why, EVERYONE was singing it!

Bill Clinton sings this in special occasions

I think the adult baby boomers missed “Hair” they just had someone write another one so they could go and get titillated again. Is it any wonder New Yorkers elected Hillary again even knowing she could have cared less about New York?

They want the oral sex King BACK in the White House!

Spring Awakening will be the biggest hit at the Sundance film festival next year. I’m getting depressed just thinking about it.

Not depressed yet? Well, there’s more.

A pig farmer in Canada, has admitted to killing 49 prostitutes and drug addicts, and then was upset because, as he put it, “I was going to do one more and make it an even 50, but I made my own grave by being sloppy.”

What did he do? Forget to put a couple of heads in the sausage maker?

I think they should put him on the American television hit Monk as a guest. Let him “kill” that final prostitute, (of course, she would not really die.) And then let Monk figure out the crime, and at the end of the show, kill him…for real.

They could put real bullets in the gun. Then, he wouldn’t have to face his parents. Everyone would be happy.

But because there is no death penalty in Canada, the people who ate Robert William Pickton’s products from his pigs which were made with the remains of all the bodies of these girls, will have to write him letters in prison, before they come down with mad cow disease.

Also, the parents of these girls will forever have a vision of a man who had a sex toy attached to the end of his gun.

Now, that was depressing.

And just to show you that I am concerned for your metal health, I will not mention that the illegal immigrant who molested a four year old actually WANTS to be sent back to his country, so he won’t have to go to prison here.

And then, after a week, he will come back and do it again.

Yes, welcome back to the nation of perverted justice, where Presidents who make adultery and fallacio “cool” and catholic Priests who molest little boys never have to go to jail, and women teachers who molest little boys get off with community service, and Paris Hilton and Brittany Spears are America’s daughter’s role models.

Wake me up when today over, will ya?

Nobody’s Perfect: This is what really depressed me today. Hillary has a new sound bite to make us all forget her past: She told Brian Williams someone she knew said this to describe her once:

“I’m the most famous person you don’t really know who I really am.”

You mean it gets worse?

Nobody Knows; Abortion is the second most performed surgery in America.

Nobody Cares; The average duration of a marriage before a divorce use to be seven years. It will now be reduced to one month due to HD TV, which will save many men child support checks.

Sunday, January 21, 2007

Hillary, Let's Chat!

Nobody’s Opinion:

Well Hillary! You announced today that you want to chat to me! The middle class nobody out here who has had to watch you on TV for over a decade! Boy, this is a first!

How marvelous! I saw that you came out last Saturday on the internet, with a full green lawn of grass and nice green trees behind you, at your house in Washington, D.C...

Hey, honey, who IS your gardener? Send him over to my house. Any man who can make trees and grass stay green in January is worth being paid in pesos.

So Hillary, just when was this “Presidential exploratory committee” video made? Last summer? Or was that just a sweet computer summer-simulated background insert to make all of us out here in the middle of America feel better while we are falling on ice and waiting for the next electrical grid failure?

Was that an allegorical background symbol to make us all think you are “the new spring beginning?”

I think you should have put a deer grazing on the grass. Or better yet, had Bill out mowing the back yard lawn, and picking up dog piles: while helping the Mexican gardener.

So Hillary, when you become President, are you going to mandate “solar panels” on every home?

And are you going to do all you can to give all women in the world free abortions on the American taxpayers money again?

I know it really pissed you off when President Bush shut down that program. Correct me if I’m wrong, but didn’t you help get that wonderful program into China…protecting the woman’s right over there to get rid of all those little girl babies, with OUR help?

Are we going to get free abortions here? Will all babies be mandated to be in federal schools by the age of one?

How thoughtful of you Hillary, you know most of these young people have no clue how to raise a child.

Seriously Hillary, actually sweetheart, I’m so glad you’ve invited me into this “conversation” because you have never wanted to converse with me before!

If I e-mail you, will you e-mail me back?

I heard you say in your “Hillary’s imitation of Oprah Winfrey’s cozy chat on the sofa” video, that you grew up in the middle class in Chicago; therefore you really want me to feel close to you! How sweet!

Okay Madame Hillary…let’s talk, “let the conversation begin.”

You say you want my opinion on quality affordable heath care. You know Hillary, before you and your husband were in the White House, I had a wonderful doctor. Insurance was pretty cheap, drugs were cheap, and the doctor could spend as much time as he wanted with me. Then somewhere while you and your husband were in office, we got the HMO’s. Oh sure, it sounded great at the start.

So what if you only pay $20 co-pay? Your doctor can only give you about 7 minutes to figure out what’s wrong with you. Doctors cannot do much of anything in that time frame except tell you about their golf game. Then they take an uninterested educated guess at your complaint, and give you a drug.

Now, after the Clinton dynasty, if you go into a hospital, you could die with all the mistakes that are made.

So when you become President, can I go to your doctor Hillary? That would be so nice of you. Because with universal health care, it’s only going to get worse.

I blame this on you Hillary. You have made ONE big FUBAR out of the whole medical system. After you were stopped with your plans, somehow you went in through a back door.

This HMO stuff happened on YOUR watch. And don’t tell me you weren’t co-partners in the White House with your husband.

You know my cousin has his own business, but he and he wife could not afford medical insurance. He had a heart attack recently, went to the hospital, sat there for two days, and a doctor from India came in and ordered tests, but when he found out that my cousin had no insurance, he was released in ten minutes. They kicked him out.

If I were him I would have said “hola” to every single nurse.

So Hillary, can I send his bill of $60,000 dollars to you at the White House? Because he made less than a Mexican mowing lawns last year.

I just knew you’d understand.

Hillary, I must tell you, you sure let us all know that when you said you weren’t some bimbo sitting at home baking cookies, you weren’t kidding!

I heard you say the other day that you should always, “Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer.”

Is that why Bill and Daddy Bush, are now best friends? He doesn’t mind one bit when you and Bill say such nasty things about his son, not one bit.

So, are the Bushes your friends, or enemies?

You also have another saying, although you don’t dare tell us, but go ahead; we’re having such a nice private little chat.

You’ve said, “Create a problem, then come in with the solution.”

That’s the motto at all the Yale and Harvard nude parties. You learned that from Bill, didn’t you?

Well, that really worked with our medical system. And it’s has also worked with the problems in Iraq.

You and your husband just let bin Laden and all the terrorist situation get SO bad that no matter who won the Presidency, they’d be in such a hole that YOU would have to step in and fix it all! Right! How clever. Who thought that up, Bill?

Your husband even bombed Iraq and some other countries just to get them lathered up with hatred.

Yes, you were well aware that the Twin Towers were probable targets, because you tried so hard to warn the new President, didn’t you?

You even decimated the whole military down to no more than a Boy Scout troop, so that after 9/11, we had to use our National Guard after the attack…people that are not trained to fight in a war.

Now you’ve always been a big woman’s libber and a proud one. I used to be one so I know just where you’re coming from.

We all know, that as a feminist who wanted to be President, and lacking the charisma, that you had to get there using a man. Actually, I would have taken a more direct approach and tried to do it on my own.

But then again, I’m not you, thank goodness.

Now, how about the way you, as a stand up feminist who has cared about “woman’s rights,” said nothing about Bill’s philandering, the allegations of rape, and the lying to grand juries. In fact, you have done nothing but protect him.

Any feminist woman worth her salt would have headed for the divorce court.

We all just thought that you kept quiet, not because of your love for Bill, (because he had been cheating on you ever since you met him) but because of your desire for power.

And Hillary, you were pretty well spoken on the Video, but you are wise to know you cannot win on your own strength. Your speech ability is not exactly college material.

Obama can talk rings around you. Better not debate him. But of course, you won’t have too because you have more money, whew! I bet that’s a relief!

I’d rather listen to President George Bush make his speech “blunders” then have to listen to you drone on and on and say absolute nothing worth listening too.

Not to mention you cannot for the life of yourself stop saying “uh” in each and every “uh” sentence, because “uh” you are really not smart enough to “uh” stop this terribly bad habit, that “uh” you should have gotten rid of in “uh” college.


I went to your website, and all the video’s you lost all your winkles. What, are you ashamed to show your age? Is this vanity?

Well, love the touch-ups dear. Too bad Vince Foster couldn’t see you now.

But Hillary, since we are talking, I’m not sure it was such a good idea to compare your self to Margaret Thatcher.

Please Hillary, I’m here to help you. The difference between Margaret Thatcher’s IQ and yours is so great a gulf; I doubt that even your husband could disguise it.

Which is why, I’m sure you always stay very well hidden behind your bodyguards.

The years you have waited, the insults you’ve had to put up with. The lies and the cover-ups---covering up all Bill’s bimbo’s, all the “I’m not running lies”: covering up Vince Foster’s “death” by having to get up late at night to shred papers.

All the years of pretending you are a middle class patriotic American, when you are really a partner in a socialistic/communistic, third way takeover of the world.

Well, I have some nobody advice dear.

You should have married Jimmy Carter. You would have had a much happier life.

Oh, I wouldn’t let Bill pick your Vice President. Just a thought.

Well, thanks for the chat Hillary. Let’s do it again.

Nobody’s Perfect; Hillary has to pretend now that she sleeps with Bill. Ha! For a woman to stay married to one man who from the beginning of their relationship never to have been faithful to her, makes her a pretty sick cookie, or gay, or a power hungry elite psycho.
I’d say, it’s a combination, let’s not limit her.

How much hypocrisy can one nation bear?

Nobody Knows; Who is going to be her running mate? Will it be a woman/black (and half white) Obama? Will it be a southern lawyer, lower than pond scum, John Edwards? Will it be Joe Biden? Or Richardson the Mexican?

Or Arnold? Which would assure her California?

Or will it be Bill Clinton, her husband, thereby making it certain that if she is killed he will become President again.

Is there any where in the constitution that says that if the President dies, the vice President can’t take over just because he was President?

My husband I had an argument about this one. I suppose it depends on who’s interpreting it.

Any comments?

Nobody Cares: I’m getting sick. This is starting much too soon. I might need serious drugs myself before the whole thing is done. I might overdose on aspirin.

Oh, I forgot, the last two Presidents have made it a point to pardon drug lords.

I’d say by that action that drugs are here to stay.

Hillary should be selling bongs soon, on her website, along with discounted trips to China.