Friday, August 21, 2009

Nobody's Fool: Gov. David Paterson

Nobody's Fool:
Gov. David Paterson

New York's Gov. David Paterson has reported a serious national concern, and felt it was his patriotic duty to tell the press that yes, there has been, and continues to be, an attack of white zombies.

He is very concerned, and also very mad, that due to white zombies attacking him on every corner, he MIGHT not be re-elected. And that's just the start.

He warns that his very dear friend, Massachusetts Gov. Deva Patrick might also lose his re-election due to the vicious hatred of white zombies...

White zombies are ....EVERYWHERE!

But it gets worse.

He claims that the President, Mr. Obama, is also in grave danger. Because white zombies especially hate anyone playing around with their cat nip, and because Obama has threatened to take all zombies off the least those over seven...they are out to get him too.

Yes, it's been reported that the White Zombies are out to get Obama in a vast Right-Wing Zombie Conspiracy.

Mr. Obama ran to the church, who he is sure will bear him no false witness, and the church has promised to protect them all from the evil white zombies, just as long as they get on Obama's medical plan.

So, if you are black, and you see a white zombie coming around...the best thing to do is...

Go talk to your parakeet, and tell him Barney Frank would rather talk to his kitchen wall, and probably does.

(Okay, that makes no sense, but it's Friday night...what do you expect?


Thursday, August 20, 2009

Nobody Reports Clinton Not Having Sex...Again.

Nobody Reports: But somebody should!
"Now, I'm going to tell you this, and I want you to listen...I did NOT have sex with that...
MS Kim Jong-Il..."


Wednesday, August 19, 2009

The Squirrels in ObamaScare

Nobody Cares; What do these three pictures have in common? They all remind me of Obama's Health Death Plans...I mean...Health Care plans, which by all accounts, are really squirrely.
A good American with common sense will tell you that if it smells squirrely, and looks squirrely, then it probably really is squirrely! Americans don't need a weatherman to know which way the squirrels will bury their nuts! And they certainly don't need a squirrely dictator deciding who gets "care" and who doesn't.
Just because he will not personally review every case doesn't let him off the hook now, does it? What was Hilter doing while the Jews were gased? Playing with his dogs?
Have I got that right?
Obama's has announced on all the news networks that--all you crazy people saying out there in middle America saying that Obama wants to set up death squads are just plain, wrong.
Nobody will be determining who will live and who will die...there will be no "death squads" That's just a lie! You people are really dumb if you believe that! Why, even the associated press is announcing it, now, shut up and pay attention!
You've got bigger things to worry about! You must get your flu vaccine...but you better hurry! It's in great demand, we don't know if we will have enough for all of you! In fact, the shipment is....LATE!
Yeah, that marketing approach worked with the first Mario Brothers Video Game...I won't tell you how long I stood in line for that sucker.
So, America...take a good look. What do these three pictures have in common? They all represent the upcoming American, "coming to your rationing neighborhood soon," Obamascare.
I think they speak for themselves.


Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Amnesty for Blacks, Don't Worry...Be Happy!

Nobody Knows: If you are black, and feeling that you have gotten unjustly pulled over by cops and have been given unwanted traffic tickets, that you just didn't feel like you wanted to pay for, so you didn't...then I have great news for you!

If you move to St. Louis, you won't ever have to pay another ticket again! Go ahead and park that Caddy in the handicap lane! Go ahead mamma! You go girl!

In 30 municipalities (consisting of mostly African-Americans) around St. Louis and the surrounding area, traffic ticket amnesty was granted to all outstanding warrants. All you had to do was show up, and give a few bucks, and aaaaaallllll that money you owed the city was excused.

Obama be good. Obama be praised! Praise the Lord, we have a black President who will do us right!

This was a blessed community effort by a group called Better Family Life, and it was held over a three-day period, last week. All you had to do was stand in line...and those lines were loooooong. Over 8,000 people were counted in Pine Lawn alone..and that was the first morning, before ten a.m.

"Lifting these warrants will lead to employment, lifting these warrants will lead to housing, (?) and lifting these warrants will lift the fear of being arrested." said Mr. Clark, one of the "community" promoters of this grand endeavor to let black people off for breaking the law.

And, as we heard Obama say just recently, black people getting arrested is just plain..."stupid." They always have to be afraid of getting arrested when committing a crime, and that's just not right.

It's outrageous.

At the same time, Dan Isom, St. Louis's Police Chief, says that since the city is now on a tight budget due to the obvious fact that they can't collect any money whatsoever, due to fact that blacks feel they don't have to pay traffic tickets like the rest of us...he now insists that all group gatherings (like tea parties) in the city, will have to PAY for police security.

Obama be clever, Obama be cool, Obama make all of you white people look like fools!

I might add that the cities where mostly whites live, were not included in this amnesty three-day program.

And that's a blatant discrimination.

Frankly, this whole thing made me sick to my stomach.

Obama is trying to gain his tribe back. Some of them were figuring out that this Universal Health Care program would kill their grandma too...just maybe.

Good move there, Obama! Except, now, when black people WANT a cop around...they may not find one. Even black cops need a paycheck.

Amnesty is just getting warmed up. And if they can't outlaw the teaparties, then they will just make them so expensive that they won't have them...OR...people will start bringing their own protection, and that's exactly what they want.

Obama IS the Mama, who will protect us ALL!

(And by the way, if you are black, and do not have any white freinds, guess what? We get tickets for really stupid things we didn't do, also...just so you know. Not that it matters, or should...or ever could.)

But you already knew that, because you're not dumb, and neither is Obama.

Go ahead...go ahead...go ahead...go ahead!...(rappors, join in...) you go! Go Obama, Go Obama! Go ahead and call me Fred...Go ahead, go ahead, go ahead and bang your head....


Monday, August 17, 2009

Readers Digest, Bites the Dust

Nobody Flashes: Readers Digest, bites the dust.
There is a mournful cry throughout the land, when the last conservative magazine for the poor, in fact the ONLY conservative magazine left in this politically correct world...files for bankruptcy.
Be rest assured, just like National Geographic, the Readers Digest will be completely rearranged into the new liberal magazine for the new left and their favorite....cooks.
Made up mostly of that one especially cheery Latino gal who has politicians on her show every morning and lets them make cookies with know...what's her name? The gal that flips taco's in two seconds flat? You know her name. I've been trying to forget it, and I am doing an excellent job.
Now all the "hero" stories we all loved about the soldiers and brave Americans will stop. In their place will be the new International hero's. The brave grandmother who refused that hip replacement just so some poor Mexican children could be treated for the swine flu. The doctor who works for free in Watts. The Nurse who gave her kidney to save the rare sea turtle.
The new vocabulary will now be in Spanish too...
So, buenos...pinata Taco's! Another American Institution bites the dust!
Let's go crazy folks!


Sunday, August 16, 2009

Nobody's Opinion: Knowledge IS Everything

Nobody’s Opinion: I just love it when things just fall into place…don’t you?
Like those paper-maze puzzles you did as a kid. You followed the path and it leads to another path, and then when you linked them up they all came out to the same place, right smack in the middle.

They used to have them as place mats in family off-the-highway restaurants to keep the kids busy. The waitress hands the kids some crayons, and then the adults could actually rest, at least until the kids got bored again.

So, where I’m I going with this? Hand me that crayon.

This afternoon, I watched a film called Knowing with Nicolas Cage. The “tag” to the movie says, “Knowing is everything.”

Boy, ain’t that the truth.

Basically, it’s another, the world is going to blow up, all the people on the planet are going to suffer and die movie. If you don’t want to know what happens, read no further.

Anyway, unlike Independence Day, where the people of the earth defeat the aliens, in this movie, it’s a big old sun-burp that basically incinerates the earth, and Nicolas Cage happens to figure this event out by figuring out numbers left on a piece of paper by some little girl fifty years ago. But these movie aliens only want to save two members of the human race in order to replant them on another planet.

Of course, they are kids. And as the world is being blown up, the father is told he cannot come with the kids to the new planet. He must “let go” and accept his death.

Now, there is PLENTY of room on this new planet, and the aliens have a LOT of big super space ships…so, that makes no sense…unless you, as the producer, have a more important “point” to make.

As I draw my red crayon down the left hand of the paper, I am reading today, in Jonah Goldberg’s masterpiece of research: Liberal Fascism. And I just happen to be on the chapter called, “The Eugenic Ghost in the Fascist Machine.”

His research points out that Liberals in America were the fathers of that crummy idea of getting rid of “races” and undesirables---and how Hitler took the ideas of some of these “socialist” nutcases and used them in his “master race” plans.

Here, in 2009, the “master race” is anyone who goes to Harvard, but that’s another blog.

Starting upwards with my black crayon from the bottom, there is Obama and his “progressive” and caring Congress of “Universal Health Care” soldiers, who, no matter how sweetly they suggest that the old should not make way for the young, it stills comes out to the same message---Buckle up you old people, and less than worthy souls. Quit being so selfish and get off the planet…it’s for the survival of the human species.

Sarah Palin had it exactly right.

In power-hungry halls of progressive rulers, social engineering is mandatory in order to preserve the state: the state in which they play God.

Obama will tell you that our “elite” rulers don’t want to kill anyone. But if you read this book, you will find, that time and time again, leaders from Woodrow Wilson, FDR, Hitler, HG Wells, Holmes---they all believed in preserving a superior class of people.
Somehow Barney Frank got into this maze of superiors, but there's another puzzle.

I see now that my lines are connecting right in the middle, and that’s always fun, except I’m not that little kid anymore, and this is a group of leaders who will do anything they can to convince a people that its only right that many of us should die (sooner) in order for the young to live.

At the end of the movie, Nicolas Cage lets his son go with the aliens while he quietly goes back to his preacher dad, to embrace and accept his death, because they are all going to meet up in heaven.

Then they all die.

You know, I like a good sci-fi movie just as much as the next guy, but I am really getting tired of governmental social messages being put into just about everything we watch.

Knowing is everything. Knowing the plans that your government has for you should be right up there at the top of the lists, and we deserve to know the truth.

Genocide is still genocide, no matter how it’s packaged, and we are being programmed…to accept our fate. Spreading the wealth around is bad enough, but dying in order to make room for the young and to balance a budget, is going much too far for most of us, frankly.

There is another saying that I like even better...”The truth shall set you free.”

Okay, I made it to the center. How about you?
Need a crayon?