Saturday, March 06, 2010

Nobody's E-Mail




Nobody's E-Mail:
It's Saturday night, and I'm just about as tired as a wormturd. (I just read that word in a Stephen King novel...blame him.)
So, I'm just going to paste up a couple of things that I got in my e-mail bucket of fun.
Yep, that me...expressing how I feel about Obama and his CARE so far, and his joyous fact that we only lost 36, 000 jobs last hour, due to the snow.
In fact, Obama is so concerned about that, he has called for a summit on entrepreneurship....with the Islamic world!!He wants to make sure THEY get jobs!
May a thousand camels barf on his Sunday Lobster Dinner.
(Now, where's that wormturd?)

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Friday, March 05, 2010

Our Fast and Reliable Government...

Nobody Wonders:

Is it me? Farouk Umar Abdul Mutallab was caught on December 25, 2009, trying to blow up a plane over Detroit.

It is now, March 5, 2010, and already they have put up 40 of these x-ray machines, with 150 to be deployed everywhere soon. To be use randomly, no doubt, on little old ladies and young girls with young figures, more than likely. They might throw in a few businessmen to make it look good.

Uh.....mmmmm...

It was almost as if they were just WAITING...in some bunker somewhere...for this "attack" to happen.

When does the government EVER do anything this fast?

I'm just saying, they fail at everything, but when it comes to taxes and taking our freedoms away, they work like lighting.

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Nobody's Absurdities, No. 71: Choose Your Pilot Well








Nobody's Absurdities:
Yesterday, the top story on the FOX evening news---was that some air traffic controller let his kid say some message like-- "Flight 348, you are clear for takeoff." The "controller father" was instantly ostracized and sent to be punished, probably by the CIA, deep in the dungeons of the Chicago Mob offices, under strict military secrecy, and tortured...we will never know.
Why...this was of national security concern! Your government is protecting you from evil-minded parents, who are trying to teach their kids what's it's like to work for a living.
Never mind that our local libraries are promoting "get to know your community workers, comrade children," with cool fliers. The "take your child to work day" has been around for quite some time...it's part of the "get the mommy's out there, agenda....just like the women in Russia, " Introduced, if I remember right, when the Clinton's were in office.
And once upon a time in America... children did work and help their parents. Today, they are just expected to put up their X-Box.
So...did the plane crash?
No, there WAS no national security problem. The pilot laughed. Two (men) adults, knowing exactly what was going on, and seeing absolutely nothing dangerous about it.
But there was a gender problem. If a woman controller had done this very same thing...she would have been praised, probably invited to the White House, and it certainly wouldn't have been used as the top news item of the day to get your mind off of the REAL changes that Obama was doing to our National Security.
It got your mind off the communist coup being done minute by minute---by minute.
The real story's lead last night SHOULD have pointed to the National Security problem, which happened in Chicago. Chicago is growing a whole brand of raciest Muslims right in our mists...(They grew one right into the White House)
Who's to say that these Black Muslims will not want to join with their "brothers" in the East, to take down this raciest and Zionist America? They say it, they preach it...and yet...Obama is looking at our e-mails for "white home- grown terrorists."
You know we're not in Kansas anymore when the conservative FOX News' lead-off story is about some kid saying "you can take off now" on a microphone, instead of the story of over 20,000 black racists gathering storm in Chicago.
So why would they do such nonsense? Because the kid said "Adios" at the end.
This is the way they do social engineering....very...subtle. The merging of America with illegal immigrant slaveocracy from South America is on both parities agenda. We need to merge with Mexico...to save their "jobs." People in America must get used to becoming a bi-lingual country.
No use of a good "subtle example" should be passed up.
On the common sense side of things...let's not forget that there was a young "girl" named Vicki Van Meter, age 11, who actually flew a plane across the United States and also to Scotland, with the help of an instructor.
God forbid we act as adults in this country and teach our children...anything. That's up to the state.
We should be encourage women and kids to be pilots if they want to be...free to fly the world...not women who don scarfs, and follow the path of an ALLAH world,. Woman who will forever be condemned to becoming the slaves of men.
So, are the black racists in Chicago going to make good community workers? Right now, they are working perfectly in their community to further Obama's cause.
Obama, who is piloting this plane to crash in Allah's flames.
We need to grab hold of the controls before it's too late.

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Thursday, March 04, 2010

Nobody Wins: Gates Replaces Gore




Nobody Wins When Al Gore is Replaced by Bill Gates

Gee....the global warming nuts are in serious danger mode. Due to a hard winter, a few "Oops, we didn't mean to get caught trying to hide REAL scientific data," and a whole lot of people not wanting to give their thermostats over to Al Gore---the Bilderburg group of, "We need to grab this moment of power, and we need to do it NOW!" is in serious jeopardy.

Since Copenhagen went down as the biggest waste of Co2 in history, (right up there with the last gathering of the 111th Congress) desperation of the global "elites" has been deeply felt, and Al Gore's Inconvenient Truth is being banned from schools as we speak.

Okay...so it's only one school on Gilligan's Island, but-- that's one too many.

Still, don't hold your breath that the tide has finally turned on the guru of nine-com-polar-bear- poop--- Al Gore.

No, he is getting help.

They have found another messenger....a real GOD....a man who, along with GE, IBM, and a few other of the Fortune 300 who rule the world, is going to come to "our" rescue. That lovable school-boy, "Oh gosh, I have a another wish for the planet besides owning the biggest monopoly in the universe and enslaving all of India"---Bill (I have a wish) Gates.

Yes, Bill told the audience of the TED conference recently (Totally Elite Dimwits) that due to the fact that the WEATHER is keeping billions of starving people all over the planet from bringing their crops to market, we need to do something. Never mind that the Jews took a sand- filled desert and made it into abundant farms to feed millions of Muslims somehow, it seems, no one else can do it on the planet without Bill's help.

According to Bill, man-made global warming is putting too much CO2 into the air, and we have JUST got to get that CO2 down to... Are you ready for this? ----Zero (Psst...don't tell the trees.)

Again...Zero...And we can do this.

(Okay, the only way we can get C02 down to zero, is if we all die, including Bill--- but that's a mute point when your Bill Gates and you have a WISH.)

Think I'm making this up? See Bill's new Inconvenient Wish...here!

Bill Gates, the man who believes I'm sure, without any argument, that he is the most intelligent and generous man to ever have walked the planet, (And if he gets by with this he could be right.) has a plan. He wants to build a series of a few supercomputers all over the world, that will make energy for the whole planet, and spread this energy into every home in the world. He suggests we take all the nuclear waste out of deep freeze, dig a bunch of DEEEEPPP holes, stuff them in, and then build his Supercomputers on top. He's already working with Russia on this.

What's the next step? Well...Bill runs his whole house on computers...all 345 ( there may be more since last I read) rooms. Why wouldn't he want to put everyone's house on computers? If your Bill Gates...the temptation is just too hard to resist.

Think of it. Every home will have Bill Gates' new Microsoft energy Window's thermostats, which will, just like his computers, have to be replaced as soon as it is installed due to newer Bill Gates' version of Windows Eight...to run your whole household!

Get the newest data, and if you DON'T...your whole house will be shut down. And God forbid you should have any lights in it but those new, nifty, GE bulbs...or your whole house will shut off...and your toilets will stop flushing.

I don't even want to go there.

BILL GATES won't even have to send you a warning if you don't update. Your refrigerator will lock down until you get the right death- killing GE bulbs installed in every lamp.
Your shower will shut off...and be regulated by Bill himself. UNLESS of course, you get his premium systems, or belong to the company one of the Fortune 500. (Union members, all of Congress, and Goldman Sachs of course, will all get free energy.)

Imagine...it's 2013 (Wow...we were NOT destroyed in 2012!) and your heater goes off. You go to your Microsoft thermostat, which keeps your home at 65 degrees in the winter. But that pesky global warming is still here, and it's five below zero outside. So, you call Microsoft.

****************************

"Hello?"

"Dyessss...kin I elp u?"

"My heater went down..."

"Please leee meeee install the latesst tichnology. I can't do tat until you buy the up-dated software insurance."

"How much is that?

"Four- hundred and tweenty duollars."

"That's extortion! This is a brand new thermostat!"

"Pleease call Mikrosoft...to get help."

"I thought you were Microsoft!!!"

"Okey... you must send your thermostat in to be feixed..that will cost you eight hunderd dolar."


Impossible you say? Before you think I'm crazy remember a few things.

Bill Gates wanted to take over the world...and make it paperless. (Read his books) Now--- do you remember watching the Twin Towers come down? Do you also remember that the city was covered in tons and tons of paper? Why do you think there was so much paper? Our paper use has tripled since the invention of Word.

Also, the latest version of Bill Gates energy "computers" to control your home, will become outdated every single year. You will not be able to keep up with it. Think of what your energy bill will be if run by Bill Gates.

Just recently, Bill Gates suggested that the world population can be controlled with vaccines. (How convenient for him, since he's already in the vaccine business.) But...he's pretty nebulous on just how that works.

Common sense says vaccines saves lives, which would ADD to the population...right? Is Bill actually on the sterilization bandwagon with Osama's Czars and just doesn't want to admit it? I don't know, do you? From this nobody's view, I'll take my chances with watching my own breathe escape from my body, rather than trust a handful of global megalomaniacs out to get rich by controlling the world and every single move everyone in it makes.

So, when you hear Bill Gates say that we need to get CO2 leverls to zero, and the world's population can be controlled with vaccines...ask yourself---just how smart is Bill Gates?

And just how dumb are you?

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Wednesday, March 03, 2010

Nobody Flashes...John Adams


Nobody Flashes!
I just got this e-mail...thanks to Pat.
"In my many years I have come to a conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a Congress."
John Adams

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Tuesday, March 02, 2010

Nobody Wonders What Rahm Is Saying...


Nobody Cares: Wow...this picture was just TOO good to pass up, don't ya think?
Nobody Wonders just what Rahm was saying to Nancy...
"Mmmmm....have I got a stimulus package for YOU!"
"Wanna hop in my naggur and feel my health care nugget?"
"Go on...say it...it just gets me so excited...go on...I love it when you talk nasty...say...Tea Party Nazi's....whisper it...go on...just once..."
"Wouldn't you like me to "shove through
my big 'crisis' into your public service box?...Mmmm?"
"How about a free ride on your new Jet? Lets' stop and get a room in Las Vegas and charge it to Harry."
"Go on...did you do BOTH these guys at once? Naaaawwww...."
"God, you smell just as good as an Obama slam dunk after his morning basketball workout...as good as another eight years in that closed door room..we're we ordered caviar room service...remember that table? "
Okay...that last one was completely uncalled for...Nancy would never make it on a table...
"Hey, meet me in the Oval office after this...I know a perfect spot, where no one would look for us because no one looks in the same place twice."
"Is that "Ode to Botox" you're wearing...or is that beeswax I'm smelling?"
(Nobody Makes this stuff up)

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Monday, March 01, 2010

Nobody's Perfect: Build it, And 'They' Will...Come







Nobody's Perfect:




Today's Nobody's Perfect contest goes to our elite and money-spending greedy leaders, who have decided in their infinite greedy wisdom, that although we CANNOT yet replace the destroyed World Trade Center with anything but...sidewalks...ten years later---

We CAN and WILL build billion-dollar embassy's all over the world...like this new "green" embassy that is going to be built in London.

Which is only preceded by the huge billion-dollar US embassy built in Baghdad...complete with swimming pool big enough for the Sheiks and Nancy Pelosi's family members, who number in the hundreds of thousands....

America...land of the greedy politicians...home of the suckers.

I can't wait to see what they build in Haiti...Charlie Rangel is in dire need of a new vacation home.

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Sunday, February 28, 2010

The Gold Goes to ....NOBODY!





Nobody's Opinion:
Wow...nothing like starting back up writing...trying to get back into the "seat" of daily musings, right under a Stephen King full moon...but, better than never I'd say.
Some time in the year 2014, when I turn on my 3-D TV, (I dream) and the Moscow Olympics are being held in Russia, and more than likely...Communism will be the new and latest political "survival" kit being kicked into global gear...I will think back and try to remember just what was I doing during the LAST Winter Olympics, and I will remember...
Oh yeah...that was the month that there were Giant Beavers and Moose being floated around the ice under the dome in Vancouver, while giant Las Vegas girls with red hair...were floated up high in the top of the tent pretending to be very sexy--- Maple Leafs!
If that doesn't make you want to visit Canada, I don't know what will! Giant beavers and floating Maple Leaves full of beautiful women!
My lasting thoughts of this year's winter games will be that Canada wants us to think that all they have in Canada is Canadian Mounties, shortages of condoms, lots of white people who like play hockey, and a deep impression of William Shatner making love in a canoe.
If Canada had NOT won the final Ice Hockey Game, the earth as we know it, would have ceased to exist.
I will also remember how amazing it was, that with nothing but images of mostly white people gathered to compete in the Winter sports...not one person cried "raciest white people!"
Imagine!
It was also the month that, while nude people stood around in Sydney, Australia, and were told to hold hands, the straight people didn't want to hold the hand of the nude gay person next to them...which of course drove the artist crazy,( so he says)...but I think it was just a ploy to make all those people stand out in the buff for longer than twenty minutes so that he could get a REALLY good look at all the babes.
Yes, that guy (the photographer) should get a gold metal for "the most imaginative way to get women to take their clothes off!" My friend amfortas, was no doubt In Sydney that day, if not participating...enjoying. I bet he walked for...miles....
It was also a most frustrating month that I traded in FOUR computers within a three week period, due to the fact that BEST BUY got a bad batch of computers...sort of like...bad batch of dog food.
What can you do? It's a full moon.
Al Gore also declared that it was the warmest month on record, even though while most of the world as we know it, was under fifteen feet of heavy snow. Al declared that the earth was warm...leaving out that pesky little fact that in order for snow to STAY on the ground, you need VERY cold temperatures..he just insists that all that moisture from warm oceans is causing the snow... and therefore, those of use who ignore his facts, are...criminals.
I don't think he has enough jails to hold us all, do you?
Just a few days ago, in this month of February, I watched a whole day's worth of weather terror, thrown out in a minute-to-minute update of weather absurdities.....that Hawaii was going to be smashed under a terrible tsunami.. right after Chile's earthquake....and every channel was tuned to capture the devastating blow...only to finally report a wave no bigger than the one I make in my bathtub when I get out of it.
Obama even made a looooog walk out of the White House down to the end of the driveway and announced, "We're ready for it."
Yeah...sure we are.
Obama, (please don't make me call him President...you can't make me. Nobody named OBAMA should be called the President of the United States...so leave me alone)
Anyway, King Obama Hussein held a ridiculous Marathon on Health Care one cozy afternoon in order to show that he is the King, and he will listen to us, but he won the election so #&$*# you all.
All the while this went on, you could tell someone was prompting him what to say in a very well hidden ear phone, because he would listen...and then talk---and mention things like Wal-Mart, and the fact that John McCain lost the election, almost in that order.
Speaking of John McCain, he has introduced a bill to go after all those vitamins and supplements we all depend upon to survive the heavenly fast food that makes us all sick because most fast food has the nutritional value of a basketball doused with mayonnaise---therefore, we need to get our vitamins from other sources.
Thanks once again John...you're so handy to the "cause." ---whatever that is.
Even scarier than an Olympics in Moscow is when I noticed that NOBODY reported about the fact that for the FIRST time in AMERICAN Television history, a simulation of a CYBER attack on the United States was broad casted on CNN for all the world to see...with a whole slew of very REAL, not actors, but REAL top cabinet and Washingtonian goons...basically saying if hit with an attack, the world as we know it would cease to exist.
Much like Canada losing the hockey game.
Their solution? More power...of course. Or more hockey.
Okay. Maybe in four years I'll be to old to remember all this crap. But, there is one thing I most certainly will remember.
Tyler's loves me.
Who's Tyler?
Tyler came over last night. He is the five-year-old child of my son's girlfriend at the moment.
And he and his little three-year-old sister came to my house for the first time.
You see, Tyler is just one of the many kids in this world who's parents are divorced, and the kids are ripped away from their fathers, and their old rooms are changed, and they travel from one house to another, and they are ....lost.
When they come to MY house...they feel "found." Why?
Simple. I play with them! And I have fun doing it!
So, out of nowhere, Tyler was walking into a bedroom full of kids toys and bunkbed, (Okay, I have a room just waiting for grandchildren...I admit...sneaky.) as he was walking down my hall...he stopped, and asked me..."Are we family now?"
Well what in the world am I going to say to this young man--- who I know is hurting so badly inside some idiot doctor has put him on drugs.
NO?
"Well, of course we are family!" I said
And then he said, at the top of his lungs..."I LOVE YOU!"
"I love you too!Give me A BIG hug!"
And the memory of that sweet hug I will take with me to Moscow. It was a gold metal night.
Well, I may have not won a gold metal in computing...but I have an Olympic memory of playing with two adorable kids, who reminding me just how much joy there is when you see life through a child's eyes.
And yes, I'm back...(until the next crash.)

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